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Separating from partner but still fancy him. Help!

(2 Posts)
Nikitasol Sun 12-Mar-17 14:09:35

So after nearly 3 years of screaming rows, sobbing nearly daily and feeling suffocated and unhappy, I've finally separated from my (ex)partner a few weeks ago. I feel a great sense of relief and although I've lost my mojo, the fact that we're note not rowing daily abs I've got time to invest in looking after myself, means it's starting to come back. He is a good man and a great dad but ultimately I think we're not well suited and communicate really really badly despite a lot of couples counselling and individual stuff too. The thing is though that I still fancy him. And now that we've split, my sex drive has returned with a vengeance. I'm finding seeing him to sort out finances or swap childcare is really challenging as I just want to have sex with. Despite the horrible rows we've always had a good sex life and I feel really sad about letting it go. Friends who've separated from their DH and whatever have usually done so because of infidelity or something serious like that whereas we don't have that issue so it feels far more confused as I don't hate him or anything. I just can't breathe in the relationship. Has anyone else had this? What do you do about it? We've only recently split so he hasn't moved out yet - should be another week or so. We've been mostly not around the house at the same time which helps but any advice for how not to fancy ----nail your ex would be much appreciated!

Hermonie2016 Mon 13-Mar-17 09:38:13

Check out hysterical bonding, whilst it tends to relate to affairs I think the feelings are the same.A need to feel secure and not rejected.

It will pass..especially if he's gets awkward over divorce..you start to wonder what you ever saw in him!

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