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Ex refusing to sign papers. Shall I laugh I or cry??

(14 Posts)
Heatherjayne1972 Mon 30-Jan-17 20:47:43

I posted the other day about my ex refusing to sign and sent the court papers back and received good advice thank you all
So today he texts me Bearing in mind we split up 2 1/2 years ago and we both have new partners he has decided to contest the divorce (divorce on grounds of his violence and two years separation)
He wants mediation and then to divorce me for adultery ( I started seeing new guy after I left husband)
And he wants to represent himself in court!
He is refusing to sign the papers sent in December so on advice of other posters I'm looking into bailiff services to get the ball rolling
What would actually happen if he does decide to divorce me? Would it confuse the court process I've started

NotJanine Thu 02-Feb-17 13:01:56

I don't really know the full facts, but I thought that if you divorced based on being separated for 2 years that it couldn't be contested? (unless the petitioner was lying)

It would be very difficult for him to divorce you on grounds of adultery as he would have to say when the adultery took place and as this was after you separated then it couldn't be the reason why the relationship broke down.

Heatherjayne1972 Thu 02-Feb-17 13:18:33

No not lying. Split up in 2014. Sold house last September I've been with my new chap 2 years and he's been with his new lady about the same time
He's been violent towards me and is still refusing to even acknowledge receipt of the forms saying he wants to contest the divorce
It's laughable really - (not really it's annoying )

NotJanine Thu 02-Feb-17 14:10:39

sorry, wasn't suggesting you were lying .

I think if he contests it then that means he contests you getting divorced i.e. he is disagreeing that the marriage has broken down. I don't know the facts though, as I have said.
Maybe you should see if you can get some free advice from a solicitor?

NotJanine Thu 02-Feb-17 14:11:26

And I know that you have to find the humour in these dire situations, just to keep yourself going!

AmyMum2mumStoke Mon 27-Mar-17 23:44:40

If he cross files then it becomes expensive as you could both end up in court explaining your reasons for divorce. has he admitted to you in texts or anything that he's had the petition? I'd get the baliff to serve. Does he have the money to spend on an expensive divorce or do you think he's just threatening?

MrsBertBibby Tue 28-Mar-17 18:30:50

You can't get a divorce on 2 years separation unless he agrees.

Did you also tick the unreasonable behaviour box?

MrsBertBibby Tue 28-Mar-17 18:33:22

Also, adultery is still valid for post separation relationships. There is no need for a causal connection between the breakdown and the adultery.

Heatherjayne1972 Tue 28-Mar-17 18:44:40

In the end I paid a private bailiff to serve him papers
It's gone off now to apply for the decree nisi

Heatherjayne1972 Tue 28-Mar-17 18:45:40

I had a signed (by him) agreement to divorce because of two years separation

MrsBertBibby Tue 28-Mar-17 19:17:05

That may not be enough. The fact he wouldn't sign the acknowledgement suggests he has changed his mind.

abbsisspartacus Tue 28-Mar-17 19:19:55

Same here I'm waiting for five years

thebakerwithboobs Tue 28-Mar-17 19:26:09

I know this is not the point really and I am willing to get a flaming but....does it really matter if he divorces you for adultery? I've never been divorced so totally prepared to be told I'm missing something, but does anyone ever ask to see the certificate or whatever? Does the reason for your divorce impact on anything else? Genuine question. You are still married and in a relationship with another man so it's adultery on a technicality (as is his relationship, the hypocritical twat!) but if it means you're rid of him, is there a reason you don't just get him to petition for divorce on the grounds of your adultery and you just go 'yeah, fine,' and then 'good fucking riddance,' under your breath?

Heatherjayne1972 Tue 28-Mar-17 19:36:19

My solicitor seems to think it will be enough guess I'll find out when the court responds

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