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Divorce/separation

Collaborative law - anyone tried it?

5 replies

thegirlfromthehill · 28/01/2017 21:08

Hi

Has anyone used collaborative law to finalise divorce esp financial arrangements? If so, how was it? And how much did it cost?

STBXH and I went to mediation, but he demanded the process stop and we start over with a different mediator as he felt things were not going his way. So we started the process again, this time with a different mediator, again, picked by him. Months of meetings later we finally come to an agreement - only for him to rip it up and demand yet an even bigger share of the marital pie, no doubt egged on by his spoilt girlfriend (who Daddy bankrolls... need I say more?)

Now he is demanding we 'resolve' our financial separation using collaborative law. But I am reluctant as mediation was supposed to work, but it did not, and really was little more than an expensive waste of time.

However I want very much to get the divorce finalised and therefore need to find the best way to do this.

Any thoughts on the matter will be much appreciated. Thank you.

OP posts:

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MrsBertBibby · 29/01/2017 00:30

As a family solicitor (albeit not collabotative trained) I'd say don't waste any more time and money. Issue your financial application and have done with it.

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blueshoes · 29/01/2017 00:46

Fuck collaborative law. Get thee to the courts.

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Bufferingkisses · 29/01/2017 06:53

If mediation didn't work, twice, go to court. He's looking for the best way to get what he wants. You need to use the option that ensures everyone gets what is fair.

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Hermonie2016 · 29/01/2017 09:19

Completely agree, don't fear the court process.He may need court or the threat of court to get a reasonable deal for you.

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thegirlfromthehill · 29/01/2017 12:51

Thank you for all your replies. I must admit I am daunted by the thought of court, both in terms of my fate being decided by someone else, as it were, and the cost.

I had hoped that he would be reasonable and we could have divorced fairly and quickly without all this legal wrangling, but really that just shows my naivety because a lack of ability to even communicate properly about financial issues was always a problem in our relationship, so quite why I have thought this would change now, I don't know!