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Contact arrangements & shared care advice please

(2 Posts)
BamboozledByPaperClips Tue 17-Jan-17 08:59:22

I'm trying to come to an agreement with my STBXH. I'm not sure what's fair on the children, I don't want them to be constantly shuffling between homes mainly because my STBXH suffers from ADHD and life with him has been incredibly chaotic.

We're still living together and we have alternate weekends and he does bath time twice a week, when he can get off work early. I'm proposing that all holidays are shared equally and we continue with the current arrangement but he's insistent on 50/50 shared equally. He wants every weekend and overnights too. My issue with this is the hardest part of the week I.e. school runs, homework will fall to me without any down time with the children.

He currently works 6 -8pm and has done since the kids were born. Although he's now saying he is going to quit his job in the summer to enable the 50/50 set up. I'm a little cynical and feel his main aim is to avoid paying child maintenance, spousal support etc.

Can anyone advise on a happy medium? What would the courts propose in this instance? I'd like to avoid going to court but will do so if needs be. Our youngest is 3 in April and as yet struggles with more than one overnight without me. But equally I want them to be able spend as much time with their dad.

Newbrummie Tue 17-Jan-17 10:56:46

My advice is stay out of court and give the shared care a try ?
For you to get one with your life and not get totally shafted you need him to pull his weight with the childcare

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