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Petty divorce

(5 Posts)
mylifeisamystery Mon 16-Jan-17 18:31:37

Why do people become so petty in divorce?? Two years down the line and my friends are still arguing about items of little value, while she takes ages to file paperwork. Court dates have been set do you think they will agree before this date?!

justabout2016 Tue 17-Jan-17 04:22:58

It's impossible to know.

In terms of the petty arguments - it's because emotions run high. It's usually about much more than the possessions - more about "winning" in my experience. If one partner feels they've been treated badly, they're unlikely to just want to roll over. As ever it's the lawyers who win in cases like these, sadly.

ThisIsStartingToBoreMe Tue 17-Jan-17 07:58:27

Yes it's more about winning. My friend got taken all the way to a final court hearing and finally agreed to split the assets with 51% going to her ex. He just had to "win" more ( even though it cost him more in legal fees than he'd gained)

mylifeisamystery Tue 17-Jan-17 17:32:45

It seems mad you would think they would split it 50/50 and move on as quickly as possible especially after 2 yrs and both new partners, costing £20k a piece in legal fees!! Madness!

justabout2016 Tue 17-Jan-17 18:31:22

It is, I agree! But you're coming at it from a rational, logical standpoint. I think people see things very differently when they are hurt and feel taken advantage of - or if there has been an affair (or even if there hasn't). When we first split up, my ex was adamant the kids weren't to bring their DS's to my house. Shouted, ranted and emailed. Swore. Until I pointed out that I wouldn't be playing on the DS!

Of course it was about way more than their DS. It was a power thing.

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