Telling the kids

[CreamTeaTotty]

OK so I'm separating. STBXH had EA for over 8 years. Kids are 14 & 10. What do we / I tell them? We are having sham Christmas and telling them afterwards.

Sources for advice on this please.

[MrsBertBibby]

Resolution's Separating Together handbook can be downloaded here

www.resolution.org.uk/landing-two-cols.asp?page_id=1152

CAFCASS's website is good too

www.cafcass.gov.uk

[CreamTeaTotty]

Thanks for these.

What is bothering me most, is do I tell them about the OW?
I have decided we should separate (he wants cake & eat and doesn't agree but is reluctantly going).
Concerned that I will appear to be the bad person forcing Daddy to leave.

[MrsBertBibby]

I don't think it's ok to tell them about an affair.

But you can't shoulder the blame, either. What does he want to tell them?

[kittybiscuits]

I think at the ages your children are, you can't really pretend it's anything other than what it is. I would just say that he has another partner and you are separating. How did he have an EA for 8 years? Or is it just that you can't prove affair and he is lying?