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My solicitor has said supervised contact for OH. His hasn't.

(4 Posts)
Blossom492 Tue 30-Aug-16 23:52:02

A few weeks ago, I came to my mum's with my children. Initially, it was to get some head space away from OH but, as time went on, I realised that I had to end the relationship due to the way he treats the children. He is emotionally abusive towards DC1 and he is so angry with the baby that I had to stop him doing night feeds as I couldn't trust him around her.

Last week, I went to see a solicitor and described some of the things that had occurred. She told me to not allow him unsupervised contact as I see him as a risk to their safety.

Today, he has been to see his own solicitor, who has told him he is entitled to stay in our house until it goes to mediation, he can have unsupervised contact and residential contact. He blatantly hasn't told them the same story as me.

I also rang my HV today to log my concerns. She spoke to the safeguarding nurse and said that one of the incidences I mentioned would have been a police matter if I had raised it at the time, but can now only go on file due to the time since it elapsed (about six weeks. He shook our two year old.)

OH is now saying that, since his solicitor has given him the all clear, he intends to come to my mum's at the weekend and take the children out. Obviously I am not OK with this.

Where do I go next? What do I do? I'm going to tell him he's not welcome here and there's no way I'm handing over the children.

I want him out of his house but he refuses to go. Even though the 2 year old's activities all start again next week and our life is there. He has plenty of money so it's not like he can't rent somewhere. I'm on maternity leave and my contract has ended.

I'm guessing I go to my solicitor again? This time with my list of all of the incidents.

Help please.

Fourormore Wed 31-Aug-16 08:35:17

You don't need to go to your solicitor again about contact. I would just calmly tell him that you have taken legal advice and spoken to your HV and that contact will need to be supervised.

It might be worth speaking to your solicitor about an occupation order. Is the house owned jointly? Are you married? Can you cover the cost of the mortgage by yourself?

Marilynsbigsister Fri 02-Sep-16 05:50:44

Op It's really important to understand that solicitors advise on the law. They are not The law. The only person who can compel you to handover your children is a judge. Until that time because of his behaviour the answer is no. He can apply to the courts where based on what you are saying, reports will be ordered and supervised contact ordered . Until he does that do not let them go.

insancerre Fri 02-Sep-16 06:11:46

I'm not understanding the 6 weeks rule for the shaking incident

I'm pretty certain you could report that to the police now. Which is probably what you need to do if you are serious about his ability to keep your children safe from harm

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