How long to get divorce notice sent initially?

[piperchapman44]

I;ll be using Bury- and I'm want to make sure that my ex doesn't get the divorce through while he has dd over the summer, i was going to wait until september to file but I desperately want to get it started. If I filed end of July presumably he'd get the petition through in August though - or does it take longer? Ideal situation would be for him to receive it from 5th sept onwards and I'm just trying to work out when to file it! Any tips welcomed!

[Minime85]

Why don't you want him to get it in the summer? I'm not in your area but initial paperwork came back within a couple of weeks that has to be signed and sent back to then apply for nisi

[FV45]

I had control over when my stbx received The Petition. It has to be agreed (or not) by both parties before it is filed with the Court. Or have you already done that bit?

Our Petition was filed at the very end of Dec 2015 and nisi arrived in April (Bury St Edmunds).

[FV45]

I mean the draft Petition. It was then changed before filing with the Court.
It took a couple of weeks for the Court to then issue the Petition.

[piperchapman44]

I was going to send it to him at the same time, as he won't agree, he'll go nuts, and it's taken me 18 months to get to this point after taking 7 years to leave him (abusive). I just don't want to be derailed. Is it a legal thing that he has to see it first? Solicitor did tell me that but she didn't put any big emphasis on it.

[piperchapman44]

I don;t want him to get it while he has care of dd (fortnight in late aug) as in front of her he will:
a) cry
b) tell her mummy is ruining our lives by divorcing daddy
c) get angry
d) do nothing with her for two weeks because he's too depressed (although he's not)

So my plan was to file on 30 August ish and send to him additionally so he receives a copy the day she is back at school - then he gets the thing back from the court, and I'll get sol to write to him the week after starting financial negotiations.

Does that work to get a nisi by Christmas ? Then either we'll have finances sorted and can put the house on the market by the spring, or we'll be locked in battle at court, which I don't have a huge amount of control over as I can't possibly house dd near a decent school on 50% plus I work PT to care for her, much as I would like this all over and done with asap.

[2yummymummy2]

If he is abusive and unstable I wouldn't count on him signing the paperwork. It could take a lot longer than you think

Get the papers sent off now. He might never sign the papers you would have to prove to the court that he's been served instead etc.

Warn your dd that he may say strange stuff and act crazy and good luck.