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dh has just announced he wants to separate as he isn't happy anymore

(10 Posts)
Autumnalhedgehog Tue 07-Jun-16 12:04:13

Told me a week ago was very shocked
I was aware that he wasn't happy very moody etc thought other reasons
We have been married 11 years have 2 kids
What do you do about living arrangements
I want to stay here with girls dh pays mortgage can't afford this house and another one

AmberGreyson Fri 10-Jun-16 07:23:00

It's sad. Don't worry about mortgage, you need to worry about custody. U must gain full custody. Find a good lawyer, recommend to look here . They are real professionals, no doubts (helped with my divorce).

lifeisunjust Fri 10-Jun-16 11:39:15

Why must there be full custody? That is very adversary and not good for children, unless there are good reasons not to share care like DV, drug abuse.

chocolatemuppet Sat 11-Jun-16 14:53:36

I agree. Why 'must' OP go for full custody? If no issues with ex-H, then seeing both parents is almost always in the children's best interests.

Minime85 Sun 12-Jun-16 07:57:17

Best thing for kids unless abuse is to share parental responsibility. You need to try and talk through with oh what will happen. See a solicitor on your own and find out what you are entitled to

branofthemist Sun 12-Jun-16 08:02:04

I would also like know why she must go for full custody?

Is that really best for the kids?

Fairylea Sun 12-Jun-16 08:05:28

50/50 shared custody is the general starting point nowadays.

I would go and see a solicitor and get advice about the mortgage / financial side of things.

I would look on to get some idea of what you might be entitled to benefit wise without your husbands income (it's anonymous and you can enter your figures in hypothetically).

ivykaty44 Sun 12-Jun-16 08:11:59

Op this must be a big shock for you both emotionally and financially

Do you work? If so you need to look into claiming tax credits and working tax credits

Your ex will need to pay 25% of his net income to you as maintenance

You would be encouraged to sort out residency of the children between you so that both parents play an active role in the dc lives. Lots of shared care is done as every other weekend, shared care during school holidays and shared bank holidays etc.

Oh and make sure you put in for tax credits and child care tax credits now, apply for the firm's today and get the ball rolling - then you will know how much you are entitled.

Put in to your district for ,25% reduction for lone adult in household.

Once you have then established your income you will know whether you can afford to stay move etc.

This is all the practice stuff

But emotional feels will come into play with both of you.

Men rarely leave without having someone else involved, you say he's been moody lately, has his appearance smartened? Aftershave being worn? Could he be playing away?

SavoyCabbage Sun 12-Jun-16 08:21:03

Don't worry about the mortgage but go for full custody is rubbish advice.

ThisIsStartingToBoreMe Sun 12-Jun-16 08:45:03

What's custardy?

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