This is a Premium feature
To use this feature subscribe to Mumsnet Premium - get first access to new features see fewer ads, and support Mumsnet.Start using Mumsnet Premium
My husband went to see a solicitor yesterday. He told that yes he will have to pay me CM but as I work I will have to pay him CM for the days he has kids. He went on to say that they will cancel each other out so he won't have to give me any. This is not what my solicitor said to me. Surely this can't be right?
I was a SAHM up until October 2015. 3 kids, 12,10,8. He earns £32k, I earn £12k. He works full time. I work part time. He will have kids for tea on a Wednesday and then overnight fri/sat 3/4 wknds. I will have them the rest of the time.
I am moving out with kids next week and now I'm really stressing about money. We had a row about it last night too.
No, he's wrong.
Check the CSA calculator. He pays you a proportion of his wage, reduced by the amount of overnights he has the kids.
Please note this is a MINIMUM expected, not an upper limit.
My calculations make it £100/week from him to you. You certainly don't pay him antyhing.
Stick with your solicitor and get the agreement in writing. That gives your protection, should he decide to not pay. My tosser of an XH moved out of the country. He tried to stop paying for DD when she turned 18, despite her still being in school. He stopped paying the moment she left, and has given her not a single penny towards her university costs, despite knowing he was expected to legally. He knows that I don't have the money to chase him through the courts here and abroad. He also had the temerity to whinge that I wanted everything in writing, as he would 'never not pay for his child'. Yeah - and he also threw in his job so I couldn't go after his wages.
So get everything in writing and don't let him get away with this!
I can't understand the mentality of these men (and presumably some women) who try to worm their way out of CM. These are your children!! Why would you deprive them? And like PP said, these payments are the MINIMUM requirement. A parent who is able to pay more to ensure a comfortable of living for their children bloody well ought to. I can't believe that this toerag is happy for you to attempt to raise HIS children on £12k per year whilst he supports just his own selfish arse on £32k.
Sorry I don't have any actual advice, but I'm really sorry he's being such a shit OP. Don't trust a word out of his mouth, he owes you some CM so just keep at it with your solicitor and ignore his claims to the contrary.
Please login first.