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Advice please..

(3 Posts)
4n0nym0u5 Tue 19-Apr-16 14:38:30

Me and my xh have two young children. 3 and 5, both are in school.

Im sorry if I ramble on but its a little complicated!

Anyway, a little background.

he decided he didnt love me anymore and so we divorced!...I since moved on and am with a new partner, been together a couple years.

He got a gf just before xmas, they are living together already and she has 2 boys of her own.

He has a hobby on the side were he coaches kids football, this takes alot of his time up including weekends. When he has our kids he still does his hobby and his gf looks after the kids at their home.

The past few weeks the kids have stayed at his on a sunday and monday night, but this seems to be effecting my youngest as he becomes quite clingy on the 2 mornings he has been at his dads.

At work he has just recently arranged to work from home some of the time, and is now looking at having the kids more through the week. He said he wants to see the kids 50% of the time.

Im not sure if this is a good idea or not?? Im all for the Dad being in our kids lives but is it normal for them to be away from Mummy so long?
I have said Im happy to try it for a couple of months to see if it works, but made it clear that the routine needs to be the same.

I dont really know what is the best for my children?? I really dont want this to impact on their school life

CommonBurdock Tue 19-Apr-16 15:51:13

My kids are resident with their dad (his insistence) so doesn't matter which parent they live with, it's the quality of the parenting that goes on when they're with him that's important. He's got a bloody nerve expecting 50-50 when he's leaving them with gf half the time. No wonder the little one's clingy, he's probably really confused.
Tell him you'll talk about 50-50 when he can prove he's with them handson 100% of the time they are with him, IF the kids are happy to be with him. It's what THEY want that comes first, not his wishes.

4n0nym0u5 Tue 19-Apr-16 16:05:15

I agree with the parental quality, to be honest, i dont know what type of a Dad he is, he wasnt around much when with me, he loves his children, he does...but I think he overlooks little things like a wobbly tooth, if shoes are too tight, he doenst brush daughters hair when shes at his. Maybe im being nit picky but if my children are going to be spending 50% of their time with Dad then id like him to take more attention!

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