it was meant to be easier

[Atiredmama]

I split with my ex in June last year after nearly 6 years and two children. He had issues with his mental health and there had been episodes of domestic violence, only a few, while we were together. I left him and moved into a flat and our relationship became fairly amicable.

I am completely miserable. I hate being a single parent. He has the kids one night a week and thinks parenting is a breeze. He has moved on, got his life together, is seeing someone but denying it, living in the house we bought together and I paid thousands to decorate right before we split. On the outset it looks like our split was everything he needed and I'm left feeling like I was the problem. He was the violent one, he was the critical one but sometimes I really do think I was better off in the relationship than where I am now - which is totally alone and miserable. at least then I had company to eat with, someone to watch tv with, someone to help with the kids. Every time he sees me he is completely friendly and I want to punch him. Why couldn't he have been this nice when we were together? He has left me a shell of a person and now he gets to carry on with his wonderful life.

I'm probably going to get flamed for this but I don't even care, it can't make me any more miserable than I am now.

[lighteningirl]

You are looking at this through rose tinted glasses sit down and write a list of the awful things he did the way he made you feel go over the bad bits and remember and reinforce why you took this momentous decision. All things pass and so will this feeling

[Atiredmama]

I've been telling myself it would pass but honestly, life is just getting more lonely, tiring and depressing.