Last Monday - I finally told my husband for the third time I wanted a divorce and manage to mean it. I have a daughter 16 and son 13. I run a small business but my fees run to £100's not £'000's like my husbands. I am 'lucky' enough that we have a spare room and I'm sleeping there and have now been able to move a lot of my things into it. God it's awful, every day he pleads with me to reconsider ( no-one else is involved after 22 years together I've finally seen how EMOTIONALLY abusive and controlling he is) he is devastated and so are the kids but they are leaning on friends and seem to be OK -ish. We are all up and down. Yesterday we had a blazing row but on the whole we are trying to sort this out on a friendly basis....BUT last week he asked me NOT to tell any of our friends -then went and told everyone incl all of my girlfriends - some of whom he then met for coffee! He also asked me not to fire the gun on a seeing a solicitor - then I found out he'd been to see one - even though he'd lied about it he finally admitted it, now he won't talk finances with me until I've seen one.
I am scared, I cry a lot, some days I'm OK and feel strong, others I worry terribly about our future. Overnight I've lost half of my so called friends as no-one will talk to me and no-one has made contact - which makes me feel like a pariah (I don't think I'm a bad person but now I'm beginning to wonder...) but these are the couples we used to see a lot of. he's told everyone first so I don't know what he's said - he can be quite dramatic. I now don't know who to trust - so I've clammed up - some girlfriends are suggesting coffee and now I'm worried that they'll tell husband things so I don't open up. I am seeing a counsellor which is helping. I'm off to see a solicitor who has been recommended but they don't offer a free consultation to begin with so it's £235 and I have no idea how I'm going to pay...
Don't know what my final question is - just needed to let some of this out I suppose.
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Divorce/separation
Separated in my own home - does it get better?
9 replies
positivo · 05/10/2015 08:45
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Richywalters12 ·
13/10/2015 22:58
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