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How to tell dd that Dh is leaving?

(5 Posts)
JustOneMoreSliceOfCakePlease Tue 07-Jul-15 23:06:34

Dd is 6 and a sensitive little soul. Dh has told be he's leaving so I'm currently trying to sort out the finances and can't bring myself to tell dd.
Any advice on how to break the news? I have no idea where to start. I have a ds but he's only just turned 2 so will probably hardly notice as Dh is always working or away on business anyway.

Sweetsecret Tue 07-Jul-15 23:19:34

It is a really tricky one, my DD is 5, and doesn't deal with change well, same as you my DS is 2, so doesn't notice.
I think the best way is for both of you to tell her he is going to live in a different house, but will still see her etc. lots and lots of reassurance, and try and be as upbeat as you can.
My DD, has been up and down, mostly okay sometimes has been angry.
I found being really consistent with visiting etc is the key. Keep a rigid routine so she feels secure.
It is such a difficult time, you need to be super strong for her, and make sure you look after yourself so you an be strong for both of them.
lots of love to you and your DC'S, it's bloody horrendous time.thanks

JustOneMoreSliceOfCakePlease Tue 07-Jul-15 23:22:56

Thank you. I am planning on telling her once school has finished for summer as I don't want her to be upset going into school for her last couple of weeks. I feel pretty ok at the minute for myself, just heartbroken for dc's.

Sweetsecret Tue 07-Jul-15 23:30:19

I know it is so difficult, in the first few weeks I would just look at the kids and burst into tears for them.
Waiting until school finishes it a great idea, as you will be able to concentrate on her and she won't have the added pressure of school.
It does get easier, there were initial tears from my DD, but she has been okay, dealt with it much better than I did. They are amazing little things. Have some fun things planned for the summer hols so you both have something nice to focus on.x

Minime85 Wed 08-Jul-15 06:59:11

So sorry justonce. My dds were 8 and 6. I agree wait until the holidays now. I was in same situation as he chose to leave. My exh and I sat them down together and told them. They were allowed to ask as many questions as they wanted. We told them both we loved them but we didn't want to live together anymore that to stay friends mummy and daddy needed separate house. We told them a week before it happened to allow them to digest it a bit but not too much. They visited his new house before he moved and saw their room.

I would try and do it together if you can as it's not just your responsibility. Books can help too. I had one called mum and dad glue which was great for both of mine. We read it then and a couple of times afterwards.

Make sure the school know. Good luck. And they do come out on the other side ok but be prepared for lots of questions.

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