Selling FMH & relocating- legal view please

[lizardqueenie]

Hi there
I'm mid way through divorce & I do have a solicitor. However what I am not really clear on is what effect/ impact if any getting my child to school each day -( DC is due to start primary this sept) has on the expectation that we should sell the FMH & relocate. I've gone back to work FT to max income, increased cost of childcare etc. Attempting to buy ex out of FMH as it is close for school & allows for easy pick up & drop off, plus my parents are close by who can help out too. Ex has offered zero support in terms of childcare during the week saying he can't/ won't/ doesn't see it as an issue. He wants a certain proportion out of the house equity which is about 35%. I would be happy to move but other properties within catchment/ reasonable distance to school would again be out of my budget if he takes equity he wants are not affordable. If I move further away I'm just not sure how on earth to do school run/ get backwards & forwards to work each day.

What I want to know thoughts whether this has any bearing on a court/ legal decision at all? Ex is not swayed by DC's best interests at all but that's another matter.

V grateful, thank you

[lifebeginsat42]

I am no legal expect but as I understand it the needs of the child(ren) will be the most important thing in the consideration of the court. I'm assuming you've already applied for and been given a space for your DC starting in Sept? Therefore if you were to have to move then this would cause disruption.

Can you afford to 'buy him out' of his share of the equity? You may not even need 'cash' to do this as it could be offset against some other asset. Or would it be possible for you to extend the mortgage?

Ultimately though, you are going to need to be able to prove you can afford to stay in the home on your own with income from your salary, CM from him, plus any benefits (tax credits etc) you're eligible to.

I hope that helps a bit, but I definitely think this is worth discussing with your solicitor.

Oh, and sorry to hear exH is seemingly unconcerned in the welfare and best interest of his child. Good job, that you are !!

[lizardqueenie]

Hi thank you

Yes I've tried to buy him out
By offering him some of the equity (I would need the rest to afford to stay there) but he said that was not enough for him. However this is actually enjoy for him to have a good deposit & buy a nice flat. He talks about the "return on his investment"

I get it to an extent but don't understand how he can choose that's what's important over the fact his child will have to move. He could take this offer of equity, allow me to buy him out & we both move forward but he wants more

[lifebeginsat42]

How long were you married? As long as it wasn't a short marriage then the starting point for splitting the equity in the home would be 50:50. How much does he want? His return on investment argument is weak.

You can't understand his lack of concern for his child's best interests as objectively he's just being selfish and greedy. It's gutting that he is so self interested.

I'd deffo discuss this with your solicitor.

[lizardqueenie]

9 years & one DC has primary place local to FMH starting in sept . I have discussed with solicitor - I'm not sure if she is not negotiating hard enough (although I have no idea on these things so I can't really criticise). He wants 100k (tho did mention he may go to 80k) Whereas for 50-60k equity to him I could buy him out, DC doesn't have to move, school run works, I can actually do school run & get to work albeit with my parents kind assistance without having to move.

[worridmum]

but him wanting 35% of the equity is not unreasonable so I assume you were offering him something like 10% (of an averge house would found a decent flat) but it would mean him getting royally screwed as it would not be a fair division of assits.

could you offer him the advance that you first offered and then allow him to keep a intrest in the house for the rest of what he wants so you both get what you want (if a bit later than he wants)

He might end up taking you to court if you were married and could possible get more % of the equity and force a sale of the house or you could end up with a mesher order but that would tie him to the house and would likely end up with him having a much greater % of the equity (think more likely to be closer to 50% of total equity at time of sale not on seperation this catchs tons of people out btw)

[lizardqueenie]

Hi.yes it's not unreasonable that he should want more I just don't know how it's viewed given i earn much less even working FT & he doesn't need as much as that to rehouse himself whereas due to my salary & restrictions I need more. To me this isn't about the money or who has more or less- if there was a 2 bed flag next to the school that would be fine for me, it would be mine & I would be happy, but it's going to be difficult for me to rehouse for much less than the cost of the FMH.

[lizardqueenie]

Thanks worried & BB- would that interest be the same as a Mesher or is this something different?

He seems he may be interested in a Mesher (although I think we both recognise the difficulties CGT for him & me having to rehouse/ re-mortgage when I am in my 50's

Thank you for your help so far