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New Partner will want children and I can't give him what he wants.

(3 Posts)
pumpkin1979 Wed 03-Jun-15 21:35:12

Hey everyone, I am a brand new poster but have read Mumsnet A LOT over the past 6 months for advice (it's been brill, when I've felt that I couldn't ask anyone else for advice). I am recently separated (6 months) and have a new partner. Well, he's not a new partner at all but a very old one; my first boyfriend who I don't think I ever quite got over (that's a whole other story) but things are starting to get to the serious stage, as you'd expect, given the past history, and I know, somewhere down the line, he will want children. He has always talked about this and would be an amazing Dad. We are both 36 but (unlike him) I have been married for 8 years and have two beautiful boys (5 and 4). I actually ended up with my ex because I accidentally got pregnant and (although I feel guilty for admitting this) I love being a mother but I do not want to go down that road again. The nappies and sleepless nights. I'm trying to claw some semblance of a life back. I don't even remember what it was like to be me anymore and I can't go back there. I don't want to string him on or hurt him as he is so emotionally invested but I know this issue is looming on the horizon. Does anyone have any similar experiences or advice? At a total loss. He makes me so happy and I want to make him happy but don't feel like I'm in position to in any way fulfil him. Thanks smile xx

Smorgasboard Thu 04-Jun-15 01:56:03

Unremarkably, the answer is to talk to him to check on the same page.

annielouisa Mon 08-Jun-15 15:53:39

You have to be honest OP because any relationship that is going to work has to be based on that.

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