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Considering divorce

(3 Posts)
Pepparules Tue 03-Dec-13 23:54:28

I have been married 9 years and have 4yr old dd. I am very unhappy in my marriage, live with my in-laws which I find difficult. Husband is not willing to move out. I have limited freedom and my husband has been verbally, emotionally and physically abusive although I have never called the police. I think he and his family are using me and do not genuinely care for me.
My dd is very happy. I do not know what to do. I cannot leave without my daughter. I have to take her with me, she is my world. What do I do? I cannot bear the thought of losing residence as I am the one who primarily looks after her. I am also very worried that she will resent me in the future for breaking her family up as I would be the one instigating the divorce. I also cannot bare the thought, of not being able to see her every day if we did separate.

I am not worried about living as a single parent as I work, I know my mum and sister would help me out. It is the contact and residence issue that worries me. Also how do I just walk out with my daughter, what if he tries to stop me, this will be disturbing for my child.

The other issue that is really bothering me is that my DD starts reception in sept next year and we have to apply for schools by jan 15th. Divorce will be so disruptive for her as I would be moving to a different part of London altogether.

I don't feel that a divorce is something I can amicably work out with my husband, I am worried about the mess.

Does anyone have any advice as to what I can do to leave and also about having permanent custody of my daughter. I cannot lose my daughter.

pinkpeony Wed 04-Dec-13 15:41:37

op, I would suggest you re-post this or ask MN to transfer this to Relationships, you will get lots more responses there and there are lots of people very knowledgeable about dealing with domestic abuse situations. Sounds like you are in a very tough spot.

JeanSeberg Wed 04-Dec-13 15:43:08

Get some legal advice as an immediate priority.

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