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These are the stages and costs of my divorce in real time !!

(45 Posts)
Screenwipe Wed 13-Mar-13 11:44:42

I went to the solicitors and asked how much they would charge me to help me get divorced. They quoted an "all inclusive fee" of £450 - including VAT. The all inclusive fee is only all inclusive though as long as I file for petition and my husband agrees to everything. If he challenges anything then there would be additional costs. Then there is the £340 that you pay to the court when you file for divorce.
As my husband and I are BEST friends, he isn't going to challenge anything. On that basis I downloaded the divorce application forms from the internet and didn't bother with the solicitor at all.
14th Jan- I filed proceedings for divorce.
18th Jan- husband received, signed and returned the acknowledgement.
25th Jan- confirmation of facts arrived. I had to wait 9 days from when my husband dated his acknowledgement before I could return this confirmation of facts.
28th Jan - returned confirmation of facts.
8th Feb - received letter confirming that my decree nisi would be pronounced (or whatever the term is) on 20th Feb. It appears 3 weeks have to pass between them receiving my confirmation of facts and the decree nisi.
20th Feb - decree nisi done.
Letter received saying that I can apply for my decree absolute after 6weeks and 1 day which will be 5th April.

numan Fri 21-Jul-17 14:47:46

Can you let me know after how many days did you recieve the letetr confriming your Nisi, my Nisis was pronounced four days ago but have not received anything from the court to confirm this yet

sambrown1 Tue 08-Apr-14 19:10:09


sambrown1 Tue 08-Apr-14 19:09:55

i paid 21k for mine, and been with my present partner for 7 years so deicded to do his online.

paid £198 to divorce online, they drew up the initial writ,
takes it to court, (paid £32 for the birth certificate of his son (15) and his marriage certificate)

paid £141 to the court.

ideal they sent back the warrant.. now i've to find solicitor office to serve the writ.. (anyone ideas on cost).

after that what happens...

LauraBridges Mon 06-Jan-14 14:47:29

Anything just about can be UB. Just about all marriages in the UK you could come up with something. In effect we have divorce on demand after a year. There are legal reasons not to go to decree absolute until you have a sealed consent order but other than that what is on the tread is a good illustration of how to go it alone.

Screenwipe Mon 06-Jan-14 14:19:04

I have just copied this from the Government website

Unreasonable behaviour

Your husband or wife behaved so badly that you can no longer bear to live with them.

This could include:

physical violence
verbal abuse, eg insults or threats
drunkenness or drug-taking
refusing to pay for housekeeping

I googled : Divorce unreasonable behaviour
You may find some more information by doing that.
Good luck

samiara85 Thu 26-Dec-13 02:27:19

Just wanted help with citing unreasonable behaviour, what does the judge deem as unreasonable behaviour? In my case verbal abuse, violent temper, distrust - not allowing me to socialise with friends and lack of support during fertility treatment, also telling me I had to choose between starting a family or a career which led to him moving out. Husband has stated that he will sign undefended. Was having difficulty writing the facts and wanted to ask others that have experienced it instead of unnecessarily paying a solicitor

Screenwipe Wed 13-Nov-13 14:18:47

Just reading posts from other people having problems with divorce.
As my ex and I were (and still are) on good terms, I did my divorce myself.
I didn't use a solicitor, for me it was cheaper, easier and very quick.
Some people choose not to apply for the decree absolute until the finances have been sorted but for me, the most important thing was to be divorced.
Wikivorce played no part in my divorce. I only used them to do my consent order.

Screenwipe Tue 25-Jun-13 08:37:56

20 Jun 13. Sealed consent order received!

Screenwipe Wed 05-Jun-13 15:24:51

2 Apr 13. I emailed Bretherton's regarding the application for the consent order - it was incorrect so I asked for an amended one to sign.
2 May 13. I chased Bretherton's and received a reply saying that they need the original signed copy of my statement of information and consent order. Again, I asked for an amended consent order.
9 May 13. Amended consent order received. We completed it and returned it.
30 May 13. Form A (Notice of intention to proceed with an application for a financial order) was emailed to me. This was completed and returned.
4 Jun 13. Confirmation that the paperwork had been sent to the courts and this bit could take 8 weeks.

babybarrister Tue 14-May-13 22:27:04

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Screenwipe Tue 16-Apr-13 14:09:05

Yes, I am very lucky. At least though people can see how long it takes to get divorced without hiccups. Having said that though, I chose not to wait for the consent order to be signed off. Otherwise I would still be married .....

Lonecatwithkitten Sat 06-Apr-13 16:37:33

screenwipe it strikes me that your divorce is very, very different to the vast majority of people. You are working in a very collaborative way which is why the wikivorce seems to be working.

Screenwipe Sat 06-Apr-13 10:07:21

What is your situation?

Screenwipe Sat 06-Apr-13 10:06:34

2anddone : We are still living together. We are best mates but so many people assume that you only get divorced if you hate each others guts. I really can't be bothered to explain why I felt the need to get divorced, it is no-one elses business anyway. Then people start butting in with you should do this and you should do that, when they haven't ever been in my situation. I have already been to the solicitors to arrange a new will, leaving everything apart from the home and my jewellery to him. I have nominated him as beneficiary on my pensions, life insurance etc. Just got to write a "how to" guide for him now because if I did happen to die before him, he would be useless!

2anddone Thu 04-Apr-13 20:52:50

screenwipe you mention that you haven't told your family or ds that you are getting divorced, can I ask if you are currently lliving together or separately? I am in similar situation

Iplone Thu 04-Apr-13 20:04:37

As a general rule it's best to wait for the consent order to be sealed by court before anyone applies for the final decree, for most it won't be a problem, for a few it can be a disaster, so just be safe and wait.

Screenwipe Thu 04-Apr-13 12:08:35

I re-read the paperwork that came with my decree nisi. Which said the earliest I can apply for my decree absolute is ... TODAY! I thought it was tomorrow.
So, I completed the form and took it to the court. Paid the £45 fee.
They said, lovely we will process this today and the paperwork will be in the post tonight.
I asked how long it would then be until my divorce is final ....
Their reply, today!
When they said they were putting it in the post tonight, I just thought they would be putting confirmation in the post, then handing my paperwork to the judge and that he would sign it eventually. Y'know, that I was APPLYING for my absolute. Not that it is actually processed on the day. So ladies and gents, if my understanding is correct, I'll be divorced by 5pm tonight. Better read my emails now, see if Bretherton's have been back in touch.

Screenwipe Tue 02-Apr-13 13:13:36

31 Mar 2013. I have finally received an email from Bretherton's with attachments:
1) A letter confirming that the person responsible for carrying out my instructions is a Paralegal, whos supervisor is xxxxx xxxx who, as a Solicitor and Partner and head of the department, has responsibility for her work.
Wikivorce claim this doesn't happen and when I spoke to them at the beginning, they gave me the name of the solicitor who would be dealing with my consent order. They stressed that "unlike other on-line companies, we only use qualified solicitors". mmmmm L I E. Still, lets see how it goes.
2) Their terms and conditions.
3) A D81 form, completed by them for me and the husband to sign. Now there are sections on this form that say things to the effect of "Tick the boxes below if they apply". "Has the mortgage company been informed of your intent to transfer ownership of the property"? So the paralegal has ticked the <no> box. Actually, she should have left both boxes unticked as they don't apply. The property and mortgage is already in my sole name, so there is no transfer of property to contact the mortgage lender about. There are a total of 8 questions where the yes/no boxes should have been left empty but she has answerd <no>. To me, anyone then reading this form would be thinking, oh this hasn't been done yet, oh they haven't applied for that yet and maybe put my paperwork in the "to follow up" tray instead of actioning it. Maybe this is nit picking but when you want something to be completed as soon as possible, the last thing you want is someone ticking the wrong boxes and then 6 months down the line saying "oh, we thought we were waiting for this or that to be done before sending the paperwork on". So I have downloaded another D81, filled it in myself and will be emailing that to them in a mo.
4) On their consent application they have emailed for us to sign, they have got my middle name wrong.

As far as timescale goes, if everything goes to plan they think my consent order should be completed in 5-6 months !

Screenwipe Tue 26-Mar-13 13:45:48

Re Wikivorce. On their website and when they talk to you they say they only use qualified solicitors. Once I had paid for my £139 pack, Wikivorce emailed me to say "from now on contact xxx at Bretherton's". I googled this person - who by the way hasn't contacted me at all and she is a Paralegal - not a fully qualified divorce lawyer. I have also googled the person who keeps emailing me to say they are opening a file for me ... she is also a Paralegal.
27 days have passed since they emailed me to say they were opening a file .... I have not heard anything else from Bretherton's. I emailed to ask how long it will be before I get my draft consent order .... not even a reply.

Mimadre Wed 20-Mar-13 23:27:10

STIDW thanks - really useful.

STIDW Wed 20-Mar-13 21:22:09

there biscuit

STIDW Wed 20-Mar-13 21:21:39

If you are in Scotland you would normally need to sort out the finances before the divorce. The Simplified Procedure can't be used when there are children under the age of 16 involved or their are outstanding financial matters. You would need to use the Ordinary Procedure. Most people would require a solicitor to draft the writ to apply unless they happened to be a family lawyer.

STIDW Wed 20-Mar-13 21:16:55

If you are in Scotland you would normally need to sort out the finances before the divorce. The Simplified Procedure can't be used when there are children under the age of 16 involved or their are outstanding financial matters. You would need to use the Ordinary Procedure. Most people would require a solicitor to draft the writ to apply unless they happened to be a family lawyer.

Mimadre Wed 20-Mar-13 19:04:00

Thanks for putting this thread up. Is it possible to do a simple divorce if you have a child and a house with mortgage in both names. I currently stay in the house and pay the mortgage and the plan is for me to change mortgage to my name. Would prefer to do it next year as finance hopefully will be better particularly if mortgage company asks for additional capital payment to transfer.

Is it possible to go for a divorce prior to sorting out the mortgage and can we use the simple divorce route if child involved?

MOSagain Sun 17-Mar-13 18:00:18

all well and good when straightforward and no complex finances. However, I think most experienced family lawyers have seen cases where parties have done DIY divorce (or Wikidivorce) which is ok when its ONLY the the main suit (ie divorce itself) They then haven't properly dealt with the ancillary relief (finances) and then a few years down the line realise they've stuffed up.

Always best to seek advice from a proper experienced family lawyer face to face rather than someone who may (or may not) be qualified over the phone.

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