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Just how far would a man go to get a woman into bed?

116 replies

newlifenewname · 10/09/2007 10:07

I am quite surprised to find that I have probably turned into a one shag only date despite my efforts for this not happen, so please tell me just how sophisticated a man's tactics for bedding women might be?

My date went to a fair amount of expense taking me out, picking me up and taking me home over two dates and said some pretty forward looking stuff and now he seems to have disappeared.

I just want to know the reality.

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Cappuccino · 10/09/2007 10:10

is this after your thread yesterday? I thought he had texted back?

I did speak to dh about this and he laughed at the very thought that you would phone the woman afterwards

you would be too busy laying in bed thinking 'Go me, I had a SHAG' to consider communicating, which would be the last thing on your mind

sorry about him

sorry about men in general

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ArguidaCod · 10/09/2007 10:10

ABerdeen

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KerryMum · 10/09/2007 10:11

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

WelshBoris · 10/09/2007 10:15

You really really need to chill


You shag the bloke once and you spend the next day either texting/thinking about texting/worrying about him not texting


You come across as needy and clingy and desperate

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Cappuccino · 10/09/2007 10:15

Boris is actually a man btw

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Carmenere · 10/09/2007 10:16

Unfortunately they have mechanism in their head that actually allows them to almost believe the lies they are telling you in order to get you into bed. So there is every chance that he may have being genuine and he may still be, it is less than 48 hours afterwards.
This is easy though. If he doesn't contact you again, he is not right for you, decision made. And you had a good shag, result

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WelshBoris · 10/09/2007 10:17

Yes, so I know about these things.


If I shagged you on a Saturday night then had a few texts and a photo >I cant beleive you sent him a photo btw< then I'd probably delete you from my phone and take out an injunction.

Enjoy the fact you got laid ffs

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newlifenewname · 10/09/2007 10:18

Cheers WB, maybe I am so don't you think I might be posting here to try and deal with it a bit better?

I'm just comparing it to all the other days when he texted quite a bit is all.

I was used and lied to and abused in my last relationship, am just trying to protect myself a bit. I clearly don't understand this stuff otherwise I wouldn't be where I am now.

Thanks Cappuccino

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Cappuccino · 10/09/2007 10:19

Boris is harsh

she would be too busy belching and watching the footy to be texting some bird back

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newlifenewname · 10/09/2007 10:20

WB, we both send photos on a daily basis

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afquestionsnamechanged · 10/09/2007 10:21

nlnn. Give him 3 days, be calm about it. He's probably thinking that he'll take you out next weekend but arrange it on Thursday or something. Sometimes people have a run of busy days and text less.

DO NOT text him again. Wait till the next one. Don't assume he'll treat you like your last partner did, give him time.
Please! for your own sanity. I'm sure he'll call in a few days.

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mymama · 10/09/2007 10:23

I agree with WelshBoris.

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FLIER · 10/09/2007 10:24

nnnn, how long have you know him for and how often did you text you prior to date 1 and date 2?

Just asking so we can get an idea of how things were pre-shag.

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WelshBoris · 10/09/2007 10:27

Regardless of what happened previously, you're stressing about this too much. I'm not having a go at you, I'm trying to save you from yourself

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newlifenewname · 10/09/2007 10:27

FLIER, was internet dating over about 2 months emailing, etc.

Phone and texts for about 2/3 weeks. 1st date on Thurs last week and 2nd date last Saturday.

I played very hard to get right up until now and was pretty non-committal all through the date in order to try and work on previous mistakes and give myself time to assess what I want. I don't know if I want long term with him, I just don't want to have been just a shag.

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WelshBoris · 10/09/2007 10:30

If you keep texting you'll piss him off.


If you are just a shag on this occasion, learn from your mistake.



2 dates should not equal a shag

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Cappuccino · 10/09/2007 10:31

no you should wait longer

god I have been married so long I think it would take me about 6 months

3 if he had a scottish accent

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FLIER · 10/09/2007 10:34

Thanks nnnn. Feel heart sorry for you, but you really do need to try and switch off from it.

Or,
I hope that there is a reason for him not getting back to you but why don't you text or email him and ask him out on a date?

Its the only way you have of knowing-and what do you have to lose? You're already feeling pretty shit about it all, you did like him, so why not give it a go?

You're a hot woman, and if its meant to be, and all that....

hth

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WelshBoris · 10/09/2007 10:37

Yes if it's meant to be and he wants to have a relationship with you then he will.


He wont be persuaded by texts or photos.


You need to think more of yourself, concentrate on other things today instead of looking at your phone and worrying about him.

Please

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mymama · 10/09/2007 10:37

What do you want from him?

It is just over 24 hours since he dropped you home. He'd shagged all night, hardly any sleep and had to go to work. He is probably shattered.

He might be trying to play it cool.

24 hours is not a long time. I don't think you are a one shag only date.

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expatinscotland · 10/09/2007 10:39

I've known men who travelled thousands of miles for a piece.

Must have been a good one!

Two dates? Not very far.

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newlifenewname · 10/09/2007 10:39

Okay, i'm going to keep on trying to be cool.

It was only about 3 texts yesterday after all and at least one was in reply to him so I don't think I have made too much of a prat of myself yet.... I hope.

I keep thinking maybe my varicose vein put him off It puts me off.

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newlifenewname · 10/09/2007 10:40

So are we saying here that sex on 2nd date is super bad?

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FLIER · 10/09/2007 10:40

I don't think he'll have noticed your varicose veins


hope all works out for you

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mymama · 10/09/2007 10:42

A varicose vein would not put him off. He probably din't notice it. Too busy looking at your boobs .

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