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I literally can’t afford to live anymore.......

(279 Posts)
Beaniebeemer Tue 02-Mar-21 18:54:59

Things have just gone to shit over the last year. My DP tried his hand at being self employed after being made redundant a year ago but he’s been ill recently (mental health, sectioned) and the business wasn’t viable so he’s unemployed now. I work part time earning about £800 a month. We have two children. A mortgage and a lot of debt. The house has about £100k equity but it’s tiny and we can’t downsize. I really don’t want to lose the house as the mortgage is cheap and rent would be so much more. We are in the universal credit system but I'm unsure what money we will get going forward. DP is getting ESA and he’s applied for PIP but I believe that takes ages. We probably need £2000 a month to survive 😢

OP’s posts: |
Findahouse21 Tue 02-Mar-21 18:57:11

£2000 is quite a significant budget - what are your outgoings?

Love51 Tue 02-Mar-21 19:01:50

My mum was in a similar situation when I was a teenager. The thing that made the difference was selling up. She was able to buy somewhere smaller and cheaper on just her small salary.

Missreginafalange Tue 02-Mar-21 19:03:02

Sorry to hear you are struggling. Does your husband want/is able to work now?

Just a thought what about becoming a delivery driver (if he can drive or have a bike) for just eat. Deliveroo or Uber? Can be short term or long term and gets paid weekly in arrears? Would help start bringing some money i

Motnight Tue 02-Mar-21 19:03:49

Sounds really hard, Op. Can you increase your work hours?

PattyPan Tue 02-Mar-21 19:04:29

Can you remortgage to release some of the equity, or increase the term to reduce the monthly payments?

Itwasgoodwhileitlasted Tue 02-Mar-21 19:04:31

Entitled website will tell you what benefits you may qualify for.

Contact your local MP about waiting for the pip assessment. They might also refer you to a food bank.

Beaniebeemer Tue 02-Mar-21 19:04:40

Mortgage is £500
Debts cost about another £600
Council tax £172
Gas electricity £85
Water £30
Tv licence / sky - £54 I can’t cancel sky I’m in contract I’ve tried 😢
Life / house insurance - £46
Cars tax and insurance X2 £80
Fuel - £100
Sim only mobiles x 2 £20 each so £40
The rest goes on food or other child related things......

OP’s posts: |
Reinventinganna Tue 02-Mar-21 19:04:44

Can you not work full time?

TierFourTears Tue 02-Mar-21 19:05:14

2k more, or 2k total?
I'm sure you've done these iterations, but any chance of picking up more hours at work for you, or getting a FT job that brings home more? Is everything you can cut back to the bone?
Have you talked to whoever has your debt about at least freezing the interest?
One PT salary with a mortgage is unlikely to be an easy balancing job. I hope someone with better ideas comes along soon.

clipcloptrop Tue 02-Mar-21 19:05:39

Can you get rid of a car??

MarieFromStTropez Tue 02-Mar-21 19:05:53

£100k equity? Jeez, how the other half live 🙄. There are people SO much worse off than you.

If things are that tight, then maybe consider selling up and moving into rented accommodation.

TwittleBee Tue 02-Mar-21 19:06:48

I am sorry you find yourself in this situation too. I wish I had some brilliant answer to help you OP. Just couldn't read and run, wanted to let you know we are in a similar situation.

We might have to face that all we can do is sacrifice our homes and somehow move into something even smaller. We have been considering selling and moving back home with the inlaws.

Gazelda Tue 02-Mar-21 19:08:14

Can you ask for a mortgage holiday to give you some breathing space?
Have you spoken to debt management charities?
Do you pay your council tax across 10 months or 12? Will you have a couple of months that you don't pay?

Beaniebeemer Tue 02-Mar-21 19:08:35

I can’t remortgage as we don’t have the income. I may be able to increase the term. I’m on a payment holiday at the moment which gives me a bit of a breather. I’m desperately trying to find DP a full time job as I believe that’s the solution. I may be able to do a few more hours but not anything massively significant. I don’t know what universal credit will pay if he’s not working and I’m getting £800 ish?

OP’s posts: |
Motnight Tue 02-Mar-21 19:08:57


£100k equity? Jeez, how the other half live 🙄. There are people SO much worse off than you.

If things are that tight, then maybe consider selling up and moving into rented accommodation.

Op has already explained that rent will cost more than her mortgage.

What are your debts, Op? Any chance of consolidating them?

OverTheHandlebars Tue 02-Mar-21 19:09:17

Could you look at a debt relief order of some description? Without those payments you might be much better able to cope. If I were you I'd be contacting one of the debt advice charities to go through options.

GBand Tue 02-Mar-21 19:09:20

Can you talk to step change about your debts? People also recommend Christians against Poverty

PattyPan Tue 02-Mar-21 19:09:25

Do you need two cars if your DP isn't working?

MsAnnFrope Tue 02-Mar-21 19:09:46

Is DH well enough to do childcare while you work FT, if you can find something FT.
Also definitely look at whether you need to run 2 cars. Even on good salaries we don’t because it’s so expensive.
Can you look at a debt plan to reduce this outgoing? Better to have a plan than default and screw your credit record.

Ohhgreat Tue 02-Mar-21 19:09:53

First thought is that if your partner isn't working, can you get rid of a car? Or SORN one so you don't need to pay tax etc (obv if you can stop using it)
Contact stepchange re the debts - they can help reduce repayments.

OverTheHandlebars Tue 02-Mar-21 19:10:23

Might also be worth posting on the money saving expert website. They have a section for people with troublesome debt that often gives excellent advice.

Crocky Tue 02-Mar-21 19:10:56

Have you looked to see if you are eligible for a council tax reduction?

mcdog Tue 02-Mar-21 19:11:07

Can you pick up a second job whilst your husband is looking for work? Call centre or fast food place maybe?

AfterEightsBeforeEight Tue 02-Mar-21 19:12:34

I don’t know what universal credit will pay if he’s not working and I’m getting £800 ish?

Do you know there are many universal credit calculators that will tell you the exact amount when you enter your details? Just Google benefits calculator and a load will come up. You can earn £592 a month before your UC is affected, as a mortgage payer.

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