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Help please, I am really desperate for some advice

(33 Posts)
mummyoftwodarlings81 Tue 25-Jun-13 10:38:18

I have just lost my job and for the first time im on benefits but this doesnt cover my mortgage my mortgage was taken as soon as the benefit hit my account which has taken all the money in my account and had left me over my overdraft.. this was two weeks ago since then i have had no money and with two young children I am desperate for any advice from anyone that can help.

I lost my job on the 3rd of May and due to the fact id only being there 13 months i didn't get any redundancy payment i called my local council for help and they had a food service that provided food for 5 days i have managed to make that last two weeks and i am currently trying to sell everything i own and the childrens toys and clothes due to a couple of sales i have managed to buy milk and bread.

I have always worked so benefits is a minefield the service i used for the food is a one off service that i cannot use again i'm am desperately in need of money to feed the children and pay my household bills and i am really unsure of what to do

Also i would like any advice on selling my items i set up a facebook page as i couldnt pay the fees on ebay so any help with this would be greatly appreciated

I am really surprised how quickly this has happened i have never been out of work before so thought i would get something straight away as i have both qualifications and over 15 years experience in my role... I also thought i was been sensible putting money away fr the children rather than myself but when i have tried to access this I was told i couldnt as its in a child trust fund but surely the children need the money now to help house and feed them so if anyone knows anyway i can get to this money this would be of immense help

Any advice would be great as i really dont know where to turn

lubeybooby Tue 25-Jun-13 10:51:18

Are you getting tax credits and child benefit? I think you can also get your mortgage interest paid for a certain amount of time. No advice on selling items but good luck

cariadmawr Tue 25-Jun-13 11:17:04

First phone and get advice on tax credit payments , contact your mortgage com go through your bank account with a fine tooth comb check all dd you may have something leaving your account you forgot about . Apply for crisis loan with the social they surely can't leave children go hungry .
Do you have family who could help even with a small food parcel it all helps . I know how you feel we lost a business back in 2001 And both if us had always worked and had no clue where to start . Do you have employment ins on your mortgage be careful ours would mot pay out as we were self employed . Phone all your service providers explain your situation ad for payment cards so you can pay when your money comes to you rather than get charges with the bank . Good luck honey it does get a BIT easier x

cariadmawr Tue 25-Jun-13 11:28:10

Sorry also forgot to say if you have children of school.age have you applied for school dinners this would mean atleast dc would have a hot meal at lunch time that would ease the presure on you at least till the.hols . Do it today and tell school you have applied it should start tomo . Please excuse typo on my phone and it got mind of its own !!!!

BCBG Tue 25-Jun-13 11:34:47

where in UK are you?

mummyoftwodarlings81 Tue 25-Jun-13 12:08:41

im in leeds... thanks for all the help definitely some things to be getting on with

do you know where you apply for school dinners this would really help with my five year old x

cariadmawr Tue 25-Jun-13 12:13:47

The school has the form or your local council office take proof of benefit with you and they should be able to start the claim for you .

mummyoftwodarlings81 Tue 25-Jun-13 12:30:09

thank you for your help at least my little boy will eat tomorrow... really worrying about this evening but hopefully something will sell in time
i was really blase about the recession as it handnt affected me but now im in a situation that i never though would never happen to me... the children used to get weekly treats on a friday that cost me between £20 and £40 and i used to think nothing of it now im absolutely desperate for some shopping and would think £20 would feed us for the rest of the week it has really given me a reality check i used to waste loads of money im just hopeful that can get myself out of this situation and soon but i know if i do i will be much more careful
I cried two weeks ago getting the shopping from the local council it was such a god send and when i used to shop in luxury each week i never appreciated it

cariadmawr Tue 25-Jun-13 12:57:02

Glad could help just that little bit wish I was closer could share what available with you xx have you told family and close friends just how bad it is I am sure someone would help you x would the hv be able to help x
I really hope it gets better soon x

Charlesroi Tue 25-Jun-13 13:54:01

I'm so sorry you are in this position and I hope you get a job soon.

In the meantime every quid counts so, as others have said, call all your service providers (Sky, mobiles etc.) and ask if you can get some help/suspend the account for a while (or you'll have to cancel). Cancel the direct debits so your bank can't charge you. The main one is obviously your mortgage provider - maybe they can give you a payment holiday?
You should get your council tax covered but do chase them up (I know they can be a bit laissez-faire with other peoples lives).
I know BT do a budget tariff for people on low incomes (don't ditch the broadband - you'll need it for job hunting)
The water company should be helpful and they can't cut you off anyway. Gas/elec shouldn't if you've got kids in the house.
If these companies start getting arsey the CAB may be able to help you negotiate with them.

If you can get an interim job I'd take it, given all the crap that's going on with benefits atm. Remember you might get working tax credits to help.

Have you got any Tesco clubcard points or similar? Might help get a bit of shopping in. Shop later on in the evening when the supermarkets do the reductions and you'll save loads.

Finally (and I know this is probably an awful thought right now) don't be afraid to ask neighbours,friends and family for help. You are not asking for a luxury cruise - just a bit of food/a tenner to tide you over.

Wishing you all the best. Things will get better

specialsubject Tue 25-Jun-13 13:57:12

did you put everything in a child trust fund with no other savings? Was it not made clear before you signed to do this that a child trust fund cannot be accessed?

lots of things you can do better next time, but that doesn't help now and none of us are born knowing how to manage money. Get to citizens advice, call your service providers and explain the situation, cancel any i-phone or TV contracts that you may have. Do NOT go for payday loans or any loan sharks. Talk to your bank.

good luck.

WorkInProgress Tue 25-Jun-13 14:14:38

If you are on JSA you can apply for a benefit to cover your mortgage interest. Doesn't kick in for 13 weeks but your mortgage company may be happy to wait until then.Speak to your jobcentre/CAB about how to claim

KnitMinion Tue 25-Jun-13 14:25:11

Try going interest only on your mortgage while you are out of work.

Get your application in for Support for Mortgage Interest it is called. 13 week waiting period, but should be backdated to when you first started claiming benefits. If you tell your mortgage company that you are waiting for this to kick in, they will hopefully accept an offer of reduced payments until the SMI starts being paid to them. Currently it is paid at 3.63%, regardless of what your mortgage interest rate actually is.

confusedofengland Tue 25-Jun-13 15:34:03

Have you got any Nectar/Boots points or Clubcard vouchers you could use? Even just £2.50 could help buy some basic pasta/veg/bread etc

Also, do you know anybody who grows fruit/veg who may have a surplus at the moment? They may give you some in return for a small service such as weeding or dog walking or similar.

I have also found that ringing service providers and explaining your situation is really helpful. I have done this in the past with Council tac & water & they were really understanding & put my account on hold for a month or so. They would certainly rather do this than be sending nasty letters or cutting you off, as this costs them time & money & makes them look bad.

For selling stuff, try Gumtree. Also maybe ask at your DC's school or local church or children's centre if you can put an ad up. I have also joined a local FB selling page aimed at children/baby stuff only. Over the course of about 2 months I made around £150 from selling bits & bobs for £5/£10 here and there! If you have clothes you no longer wear, try or a similar store near you. I think they pay 40p/kilo, so not fortunes, but it all helps.

mummyoftwodarlings81 Tue 25-Jun-13 17:52:01

cariadmawr - Thanks for your help

Charlesroi - Thanks for your help

I have cancelled my landline but i couldnt cancel my virgin tv as they said i had to wait another 6 months as i got a tivo box 6 months previous but i have reduced it to the lowest package available

I only renewed my 24month contract in Feb so i Orange have said i cannot cancel but i have reduced this to the lowest i could

I will cancel the direct debits with my bank on tomorrow afternoon

My mortgage provider have said that they are going to send me and income and expenditure form that i need to send back to them along with proof i am seeking employment they do not offer a payment holiday which shocked me as i have in the past paid two lump sums off when i had save £5000 up so hopefully they will offer to switch to interest only for a period
I have called the council tax office today and i will only need to pay £5.32 per week towards this

I will call all the utilities once i can find landline numbers as my mobile will charge me i am with british gas for both my gas and elec and yorkshire water for my water

I have worked in the financial sector since leaving education but have been applying for these and a whole host of others such as shop assistant prescription delivery etc but i havent had any luck as yet but i am applying for any that i think i could do

I dont have a tesco's clubcard but i do have a boots advantage card i had forgotten about so thank you

the problem with shopping late is two young children and no one to watch them

I dont really have any family that can help my father died 6 years ago and my mother is in france and my husbands family dont really see us now as i think its still too painful and i feel really bad asking my neighbours for money as i dont know them really well and i dont know when i will be able to pay them back

specialsubject - thanks for your help

to be honest i did think i would not be allowed to draw the money and at the time i never thought i would need it

I have an appointment tomorrow at the CAB thought when i went 3 weeks ago they didnt really help but i think i am more aware of what i need to say when i get there now - please see above for reply about bills

WorkInProgress - thanks for your help

I will ask about this tomorrow I think due to being made redundant on the 3rd of May i will still have 6 weeks to wait for this but hopefully my mortgage company will reduce my payments before then

KnitMinion - thanks for your help

I will ask about this tomorrow I think due to being made redundant on the 3rd of May i will still have 6 weeks to wait for this but hopefully my mortgage company will reduce my payments before then my current rate of interest is 5%

confusedofengland - thanks for your help

I have got a boots card i had forgotten about until earlier i dont have any other points cards

I dont know anyone who grows any fruit or veg this would be a godsend with two young children and is something that i always wanted to do but never got round to i wish i had now though

I will be ringing my providers once i have cancelled the direct debits

I will register on gumtree now thanks for your advice im selling thing really cheap but not getting enough interest

Littleredant Tue 25-Jun-13 20:48:55

Two things spring to mind.
Working: Have you tried registering with employment agencies for temp work? The rates mightn't be great, but topped up with child tax/working tax credits, housing benefit etc could keep you going until something more permanent comes along. Might also lead to something more permanent in itself. This kept us afloat during a bad patch last year and is starting to reap dividends now.
Food etc: When you're at the CAB tomorrow see if they can refer you to a food bank if not, they'll be able to advise who can - this would at least give you 5 days worth of basics which may keep wolf from the door until other things kick in. Whereabouts in Leeds are you - any local allotments around? Don't suppose there'll be much surplus veg yet, but might be worth seeing if there's any left out as free to a good home (sometimes happens at the allotments near us Otley/Guiseley way).
Good luck

cariadmawr Tue 25-Jun-13 22:14:08

Jhi sorry just thought if you speak to.the school they should have some sort of.discretionary fund this.would help with school meals.till the free meals kick in .
I'm really seem to have.a idea of.what you do its not easy knowing where to turn on New to mumsnet recently really proud to say there is lots.of people who do ewant to help others even with.just words x

fakeblondie Wed 26-Jun-13 01:32:02

I really feel for you .
if you get in touch with your local churches/ Christian groups I'm sure they would do you a food parcel .

NatashaBee Wed 26-Jun-13 01:36:44

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

ICantRememberWhatSheSaid Wed 26-Jun-13 01:42:19

I guess you may already know but MoneySavingExpert is an excellent website with a great forum. It may be worth a look.

Good luck.

fakeblondie Wed 26-Jun-13 01:48:22

how old are your children ?

LackaDAISYcal Wed 26-Jun-13 02:07:56

Some info on foodbanks in Leeds here and here

Do you have any insurance against unemployment that you can claim on your credit cards or your mortgage?

Is your husband working? Can he increase his hours?

And I'm not sure whether it would suit you or not, but I'm a homecare worker, and care companies are always crying out for good, reliable staff. Pay not brilliant, but depending on the hours you want to work, it will cover your basic food bill for the week. I do evenings and weekends to avoid us having to pay for childcare and inspite of my initial reservations I really love the job.

PM me if you want some details; I'm also in Leeds.

MinimalistMommi Wed 26-Jun-13 09:47:31

Visit this website
She feeds herself and her little one for around ten pounds a week (I forget the exact amount) using Sainsburys basics and they're healthy meals. I know this doesn't help you immediately but if you manage to sell anything it might help.

Do you have any food in your cupboards at all?

MinimalistMommi Wed 26-Jun-13 09:47:43

dreamingbohemian Wed 26-Jun-13 10:10:33

I am so sorry. I wish I had better ideas but I googled some stuff on food banks in Leeds, I hope it's somewhat helpful:

"Any family accessing the Armley food bank has to be referred by an agency or care professinal, which could be their doctor, housing officer, midwife or health visitor. They will be given a voucher stating how many people are in their family, and how many days they need food for. While a survival kit of tins, packet foods, long life milk and other items is put together in used supermarket carrier bags, staff will work to signpost people to avenues for long term help. Food bank vouchers can be used three times a year."

"The South Leeds Food bank is a project started and championed by a partnership of local churches, including Middleton Methodist Church, which Helen belongs to. Deacon Al Henry is in charge of the flock at Middleton. The church, along with partner churches, already provides drop in sessions where people in dire need can take away donations of food."

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