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I don't know how we're going to cope financially

(63 Posts)
TeapotsInJune Tue 30-Oct-12 08:42:07

Does anyone else get this mad sense of panic just build up and overwhelm them completely? In utterly dire financial mess at the moment and trying to sell the house but no one wants it.

The ridiculous thing is, on paper, we both are well-paid!

YellowSun12 Fri 23-Nov-12 13:05:16

I'm exactly the same - and I feel that I should know better than to get in this mess. It's doing my head in, I'm really down about it. I keep redoing the budget but just can't make things balance.

Loveweekends10 Thu 01-Nov-12 05:21:06

Spending diaries are really useful. I always write down what I've spent in a little book. ( dh laughs at me) but it keeps me in check. I stop and think oh no I have been to tesco 3 times this week so then I use what I've got already.
Can you do child care vouchers through work that saved us a lot of money.
Also try to save a contingency fund as it means you don't default to credit cards all the time.
If you have credit cards switch the balances to 0% where possible. Store them in ice in freezer it makes you then have to think before you buy.

Violet77 Wed 31-Oct-12 08:06:07

I agree with the back to basics, pull it all apart and work out where your cash goes. The small amounts will make a difference.

I got out if a mess many years ago by cutting all spending out for about six months then curbing spending after that. I was single and could live off about ten pounds a month after the fixed costs. Its not nice but it ment i could keep my house and cleared thousands in debt.

It changed my view on debt at a young age.

Good luck

ClareMarriott Tue 30-Oct-12 18:15:15

Dear TeapotsInJune

To be honest, there has been a slight drip feed of information from you , so the advice provided so far may be slightly askew. Firstly, I'm taking it you have a house on which you have a mortgage but are presently living in your parents house which is the house you want to sell but because of its present condition has not had any/many viewings ? How long has it been on the market and does the asking price reflect what that type of property is being sold at ? As you yourself say it could do with a bit of work on it so has it been impossible to find time to do this ? Do the photos the estate agent has taken show it in its best light? Have you looked at the council tax position on both properties ? Are the building and contents insurers ( if different ) on both properties aware that one is not occupied all the time, because cover could be restricted if left unoccupied for a period of 30 days. Two cars have been written off - can your DH's parents help with any finance for a second hand car ? How may children do you have and could any nursery fees be renegotiated ? You're a teacher, what does your DH do ? Painful though it will seem, it does seem a case of you and your DH sitting down and going through EVERYTHING to see if you have everything you need but not what you might have doubled up on or nolonger need. Can you live on the food you have in your cupboards for a time without doing a shop ?

RowanMumsnet (MNHQ) Tue 30-Oct-12 16:50:57

Hi there

As this one isn't really an AIBU, we've moved it to Credit Crunch

Best of luck to the OP.

PickledFanjoCat Tue 30-Oct-12 15:30:18

Whoever said price as a doo-er upper was spot on Teapots.

I think we have very similar situations, although im not actually asset rich as my flat is in negative equity and no one wants it.

TeapotsInJune Tue 30-Oct-12 15:28:14

Thank you smile Asset rich and cash poor is about right, really.

I honestly can't fave moneysavingexpert (wimp!) but thanks. Have reduced the price on our house and someone is viewing on friday - please keep everything crossed smile

oohlaalaa Tue 30-Oct-12 13:16:54

I worked as an estate agent for five years, but made redundant three years ago, and since worked in a different field.

If it's in an okay location, and not overpriced, it should sell. It might take a year though. I agree on changing agents, you need to have someone you like dealing with.

I agree, it's better to sell cheap, than accumulate high APR debt. Personally I'd try to sell privately, rather than via a company.

I do think you need to make every effort to visit property at weekends, and try and make it smart from the outside at least, if at all possible? Would you be able to do it up, a bit, for Spring 2013. Can you afford to hang on to it till then?

oohlaalaa Tue 30-Oct-12 13:05:56

You have a guaranteed income coming in each month, from both of you, so I think you can get through this. From experience, it's much more hellraising when one of you is self-employed or unemployed. You also have your parents property, and no doubt some equity in the mortgaged property.

Please don't panic, you are honestly not in dire straits.

Can you use a baby sitter, for part of the week, instead of nursery? This is usually cheaper.

Is there anything you can do to your mortgaged property at weekends, just to make it look a bit loved, with minimal expenditure. Perhaps weed the garden? Clear out any junk?

In the past we have had to borrow from my parents. It sucks, being a grown up, and not able to stand up on own two feet, and having to swallow pride. Can you borrow from DH's parents? It's better than payday loans.

It might sound ridiculous, but what can you sell on ebay for some quick cash?

Can you do private tuition in evenings?

Check out the credit crunch forum on mumsnet, I prefer it to moneysavingexpert. It has some great advice for cutting spending, to the bare minimum.

Loveweekends10 Tue 30-Oct-12 12:46:10

Moneysavingexpert. Go to debt free wannabe forum.
Keep a spending diary and do a statement of affairs so others on that forum can have a look through it for you.

Whoknowswhocares Tue 30-Oct-12 12:45:43

Cricket???? Damn autocorrect! Crikey!

Whoknowswhocares Tue 30-Oct-12 12:43:22

Cricket it is really hard to give advice without the facts! A thought though....
As you don't want to live ling term in your parents house, sell it now. Use the money to pay off the debts that are stupidly high apr, get yourselves sorted re cars and rent somewhere for 6 months using a little of the capital. Then make the decision to either do up and make a better sale price on the other house or sell it at a reduced price. Once you've got clear, then you can buy a new place as you will have what's left of the capital, no mortgage on the old place and the aforementioned 2 good salaries!

RichManPoorManBeggarmanThief Tue 30-Oct-12 12:40:11

Agree with Niceguy- seems you're asset rich but cash poor (assuming that House 1 isn't in negative equity and House 2 is mortgage free).

The mortgage payments on House 1 are still largely interest so you need to sell it quickly. If you hang onto it for another year, you may be in a position where you would have been better off taking a lower offer and not having the cash outflow. Als, with it not being lived in, and no maintenance, the condition will deteriorate and so will its saleability.

niceguy2 Tue 30-Oct-12 12:34:41

I was just about to suggest one of them companies who will buy it cheap.

Obviously you won't get anywhere near the price you'd get from a private sale but in your situation it may be the best way forward since you already have your parents house to live in.

Plus cashflow seems to be what's killing you and if you have enough equity left, you could even pay the car off which would help a lot with the monthly outgoings.

Hard to know for sure though without knowing the specifics but that's what I'd be trying to do in your shoes.

SoftKittyWarmKitty Tue 30-Oct-12 12:33:07

If you're considering selling to a company that'll offer you 80% of the market value, why not instruct your agent to drop the price to, say, 90% of the market value and ask them to really push it - maybe hosting an open viewing once the price has been reduced and pushing it as a project family home? That way you might get more interest.

Also agree with MSE as a source for great advice. Do an SOA and put it on the Debt Free Wannabe forum and you'll get loads of advice on how/where to cut back, advice on getting rid of your pay day loan etc. You'll probably get suggestions you hadn't thought of. If you start off by saying you we're upset last time you were on there as you had a bereavement and posters were very hard on you (or whatever happened), so you took a break for a while but really need advice, I'm sure they'll all be extra nice to you.

RichManPoorManBeggarmanThief Tue 30-Oct-12 12:29:50

Ok- it just seems a bit mad that you have two houses, one of which is possibly owned outright (your parents ex-house) and you still have cash flow/debt problems. If I'm reading this right, and apologies if I'm not, it's quite a first world problem, if you don't mind me saying.

Remortgage the house you're in with (say) a 1 year "no replayment" holiday. Use the cash to do up house 1. Sell house 1. Repay mortgage on House 2. Or just flip house 1 now as a do-er upper. In any event you still own house 2 (the one you're living in)

TeapotsInJune Tue 30-Oct-12 12:16:18

We own it but a remortgage isn't really an option at this stage - the last thing we need is extra debt!

I think we'll have to sell it to a company just to get it off our hands really sad

RichManPoorManBeggarmanThief Tue 30-Oct-12 12:14:38

If your parents are dead, who owns the house you're currently living in? Could you remortgage it to get cash to make your other house saleable?

TeapotsInJune Tue 30-Oct-12 12:03:02

We can't, mummy - it isn't really liveable and we can't afford to get it so.

Plus, the mortgage company would make us have a b to l mortgage which would defeat the object!

Duchess, thank you - the problem is, it really does need big things, bigger than we can afford. New carpets/laminate. New ceiling hmm new bathroom, the list is endless, to be honest!

Just had a letter from an insurance company about my car accident, I need to go and cry now!

oldnewmummy Tue 30-Oct-12 11:47:12

Could you rent out the house you're not living in?

TheDuchessOfEarl Tue 30-Oct-12 11:43:42

That last post made me sound like much more of an arse than I actually am (I hope)

TheDuchessOfEarl Tue 30-Oct-12 11:36:21

Teapot If you want, you're welcome to pm me a link to the Estate Agent pics of the house, I'll have a look & tell you what would make it more saleable. I'm not an Estate Agent or Property Developer but have managed to do up and sell a few houses - setting the ceiling price for each street.

TeapotsInJune Tue 30-Oct-12 10:04:39

Thank you smile

GrendelsMum Tue 30-Oct-12 10:03:34

If you've got money worries, you really can't do better than ask for help on the MoneySavingExpert forums. I particularly recommend the Debt Free Wannabee section of the site - those people have seen far, far worse financial situations than yours is likely to be, and have been able to take steps to sort them out. There's a real sense of optimism on the board, and they will really be able to help you without judging you for having got into the mess in the first place.

janey68 Tue 30-Oct-12 09:58:10

I think you've been given some really good practical advice on here.
The main thing I want to say is that it's easy to feel overwhelmed, but you WILL ride out this difficult time.
You are in the situation of many middle earners where you earn too much to qualify for any help, but pay out shedloads in mortgage, bills, childcare... I remember that time well. I found it soul destroying on one level to be working so hard when for a couple of years my earnings were totally swallowed by childcare and commute. On another level though it was ABSOLUTELY the right thing to do- several years on I now reap the benefits and have a good career and income, so try to hold onto that long term view.

You've been unlucky in having several incidents which have knocked you back. Use the advice on here to try to make some immediate cutbacks (phones? Sky tv? Food shop?) Also do some longer term planning for once you've got through the immediate difficulties

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