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In so much debt I don't know what to do

(40 Posts)
sosadandashamed Thu 17-Feb-11 21:11:20

Don't know if Im posting in the right placed but here goes.
I am in so much debt I feel like it is taking over my life and I don't know what to do.
Simple fact is my outgoings are more than my incoming, Ive robbed Peter to pay Paul and it has snowballed scarily in the last few months.
I owe money for overdrafts, credit cards, payday loans, water rates, council tax.
In fact the only thing Im not behind with is my rent thank god although I got a letter yesterday saying it is being increased from the 1st of April.
I just don't know what to do or who to turn to and I seriously feel like doing something stupid.
I could ramble on but doubt anyone will read it.
I just feel helpless and so ashamed my life has turned out like this

3nationsfamily Thu 23-May-13 13:24:40

This is a ZOMBIE thread. OP was 2 years ago

leaderscorp Wed 15-May-13 04:58:46

Have you consulted debt relief expert already? If not, then I suggest that you should see one.

Ghostsgowoooh Fri 26-Apr-13 04:15:50

I am with Christians against poverty at the moment. They are good, they deal with my creditors, have gone through incoming and outgoings with a tooth comb and given me a budget. They take a set amount each week from my bank and spread it out amongst my debts so I should be debt free in 1-2 years. They even put someone's aside for me on savings which will be going on Xmas pressies for the kids.

I have been with before but I left because I didn't see eye to eye with my case worker and also because my dp at the time did everything he could to make me leave them, he used to spend the money the budget money down the pub.

Cap really are good. I know many of their volunteers in my area anyway as their local office is close to where I live

maigwa Thu 25-Apr-13 14:47:39

Message deleted by Mumsnet for breaking our Talk Guidelines. Replies may also be deleted.

nothingoldcanstay Wed 30-Nov-11 20:51:24

My advice would totally be to go to Uni. You don't actually pay any fees till you earn over £15,000 (may even be £21,000 these days).
I'm better off going to Uni 8 hours a week then before when I worked as a 32 hours a week as an LSA plus weekend job. I get £3000 3 times a year + a grant of £300 twice a year. lump sums really cut bills down to size. Can now get housing benefit and obviously students don't pay Council Tax. Still get child tax credits and as I'm not working can also get free school meals. Also entitled to student overdraft of £1000 interest free (this bit is worrying actually).t's 3 years breathing space and then you might even stand a chance of a better job at the end.

prayingmantisgroupie Tue 29-Nov-11 11:27:59

Old thread I know, but to anyone in a similar situation, please be aware that Harrington Brooks are a fee charging company. You're much better off going to CCCS or CAP - why would you want to add fees to your debt?

<voice of bitter experience>

Ivette Tue 01-Nov-11 18:44:38

call Harrington Brooks, they are great, I am paying 50 pcm and everything is taken care of, co debt collection agencies calling me anymore!

dementedma Sat 27-Aug-11 22:39:00

we are on year 5 of a 6 year debt repayment plan with payplan. They have been brilliant. We started out owing £18K and are now down to just over 3K and tentatively beginning to think there might be light at the end of the tunnel. it's feckin hard going though and has all but brought us to our knees at times.

madmomma Mon 22-Aug-11 21:00:34

Oh yeah - duh! Hope she's ok

Lilyloo Mon 22-Aug-11 19:16:59

This op is from February

madmomma Mon 22-Aug-11 18:56:32

OP you must get to your GP and get some anti ds if you are feeling suicidal. You may only need them for 6 months, but you have to take some action about your mental health. Once you are feeling a bit better in yourself, you'll find it easier to move forward with sorting the debt.

wickedorwhat Mon 14-Mar-11 18:21:11

10000 grand is not that much sad. there are a lot of people in more debt than that. i say you need to get angry and dont be intimidated by these sharks. ok so you spent more than you could afford. most of us do. my dh s business folded when a company went bust and did nt pay him it was a lot of money about 300,000. he had a credit card and a car finance and he just said f... off to them they have pestered him but they give up eventually. these card providers and others just sell the debt to other blood sucking agencies in the hope they can bully the money out of people. im not telling you what to do only do what you can, im only saying to you that you must not let them grind you down. they can have their money when you can afford to pay them. good luck

collision Mon 28-Feb-11 22:44:46


namechanged1234 Sat 26-Feb-11 17:14:32

Sorry I can't offer much practical advice, but have you checked to see if you're entitled to any benefits? If you're on a low income then I would have thought you could get help with housing/childcare or something. I think the government website has a calculator or something that works it out for you.

addy911 Wed 23-Feb-11 17:14:07

Paying £1 to each creditor will not make the debts go away! Your best bet it to fork out a one off fee of £90 and do a Debt Relief Order through your local CAB. You can't afford a DMP, an IVA or Bancruptcy so you really have no choice. You will have to be firm with the CAB to get an urgent appointment, but i suggest you do it tomorrow. Your car is safe,as you need it to get to work, and i presume its not a Bentley? Asking for advise is the hardest bit so well done, now you need to get it sorted once and for all, not go putting the inevitable off for another day by paying a pittance and expecting your creditors to accept this indefinitely.

LordofthePies Tue 22-Feb-11 21:09:15

Contact your nearest CAB and get an appt asap.Its
free advice and they will be able to look at your whole situation and advise on your best course of action.

They will also be able to do an income maximisation to make sure you are getting all the benefits you're entitled to.

Its tough, but you've already made the first move by posting here.

Good luck

purpleturtle Tue 22-Feb-11 19:17:15

Please go and get yourself some help with it all - you sound totally overwhelmed. If your expenses exceed your income, then your creditors will accept £1 a month, which, although it won't clear your debts in any great hurry, can at least give you a bit of breathing space to work out the best way forward.

feckinpenniless Tue 22-Feb-11 17:19:32

Sosadandashamed - just picking up on what you said about college... someone in your financial position would probably be eligible for a full grant from the Open University. Their website is excellent and there's an eligibility checker for fnancial support here: shtml

WhatsWrongWithYou Mon 21-Feb-11 21:46:04

Just wanted to point out that some of your debts are more pressing than others (apologies if you already know this).

It might seem that a large amount you owe on, say, a credit or store card, or to a friend, is the most important one to clear, but the debts it's important to prioritise are your rent, council tax and fuel bills.

This doesn't mean you should go straight out and pay them all off somehow, but you need to show these creditors you are taking the matter seriously and intend to do something about it. CAB have some information here.

I would strongly urge you to visit your CAB in the first instance; they will either help you to draw up a budget and make realistic offers, or, as ABD says, advise on bankruptcy/DRO. Or refer you to a reputable debt management company if appropriate.

Try not to dwell on feeling bad and wishing this had never happened; you're doing something about the situation now and that's a positive thing.

Fizzylemonade Mon 21-Feb-11 21:09:44

Firstly, well done for seeking help, it is too easy to bury your head in the sand.

I second what everyone else has said, check out MoneySavingExpert website and contact a charitable debt management company.

Having worked in Council Tax, I will tell you that if you fall behind with that and don't contact them they can apply to the court and have their money taken directly from your salary. It is a set amount, set by central government and is quite crippling, so please sort this one out first.

Good luck with it all. Post back here and let us know how you get on.

NoMoreChocBiscuits Thu 17-Feb-11 22:18:45

We have some debt trouble and looked at national debt line (our local CAB was so overwhelmed they'd stopped taking on more debt cases at the time), but weren't happy about paying them to sort it out so we did it ourselves.

you must prioritise (sp?) your debts, rent and CT first, utilities next then other debts, such as cc and loans. Contact everyone you are indebt to as they will more willing to deal with you if you do.

So rent's okay (for now) so move onto council tax. Talk to your local council. Can you get help by way of CT benefit? Or arrange a payment plan with the council?

Onto utilities. We pay a set amount for gas and electtric each month. This tackled arrears in managable amounts, while putting something in for new charges. Now that the arrears are cleared, the set amount has dropped and averages out over the year (ie we over pay the gas in summer which helps with the excess in Winter).

The credit cards were the toughest to deal with, but we were persistant and after sending detailed budget sheets in, we now pay a minimal amount each month.

Communication (and sheer bloody persistance sometimes) is the key. If we had just buried our head in the sand we'd have been utterly up sh!t creek and beyond by now. Some of the companies you have to deal with won't like it (mostly the banks), but if you stand firm they will see you are making an effort.

Also don't pay a debt with another debt (not easy I know).

Being in debt sucks the big time. We never planned on ending up like this, but no one can see the future eh?! Deal with it now, before it gets worse, and eventually you will see the debt getting smaller.

Sorry about the long post. Good luck and I hope you get the help you need.

KazBarTheFriendlyGhost Thu 17-Feb-11 22:15:52

sosadandashamed - I sent you a PM.

I paid £170 per month for 4 months for some company to arrange an IVA for me, during this time I stopped payments to all creditors, changed telephone numbers, changed bank accounts - as this was the advice given. Also, I was asked to forward all letters chasing payment to them - in prepaid envelopes supplied by them.

IVA company took 1st 3 payments as fees, and after 3 months they approached my creditors requesting meeting. At this meeting they proposed a new payment plan to all creditors - 2 out of 5 creditors rejected the proposal and as those 2 creditors made over 75% of total debt - my proposal was rejected! I was then told, that after paying the 3 months, they could not help me further and suggested I try for bankruptcy!

Fat lot of good that did, because in the 3 months I had accrued late payment fees, interest etc!

Anyway, 3 days before dd was born - I called each creditor individually, explained circumstances and said I intend to pay back money but just cannot at this rate - can we re-negotiate. They accepted my offer, after going through all my income and outgoings, froze all interest and agreed to review every 3 months.

Now, I'm managing finances better, I'm happy and have no one chasing me for money every day of the week.

I'd suggest contacting your creditors directly in the first instance to see what they can do for you..they want the money, they dont want to write this debt off so therefore will be more understanding...although I laid it on thick....I'm due to give birth any day now, I'm stressed out etc etc

Sorry for the long post, but the above helped me immensely

BeenBeta Thu 17-Feb-11 22:14:23

I dont know exactly. The CAB link I gave has some details but I'm sure you would have to prove what your income and outgoings are.

You have to fill in a form and then the Official Receiver will assess it and take over yor financial affairs. You will not be left destitute and with no money to live on.

sosadandashamed Thu 17-Feb-11 22:05:33

What information do I need to give to apply for a DRO? Do I have to do a budget or something or provide bank statements?
I have less than £50 per month disposable income

BeenBeta Thu 17-Feb-11 22:00:50

IWillCount - unfortunately your experience is very common on an IVA or debt management plan. IME most people only last 1-2 years.

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