How do you like/dislike my cover

[imnotelenor]

Not my name just how it would go, do you like it? Would it catch your eye.

Is it just shit???

[imnotelenor]

Also pic is of internet, but it will be near enough like it

[ScreamingValenta]

The head in hands would lead me to expect a true-life 'misery memoir' (I don't mean that term derogatorily) - is that the style of the book?

[MrsFezziwig]

The photo makes me think the novel is something gritty about drug taking and ends badly. Is it?

[imnotelenor]

It is! Atleast it's coming across as intended haha

[Tetrapanex]

I like it. I like the font you’ve used in red for the title. It would catch my attention in a shop and I’d pick it up to read the back.

[ScreamingValenta]

It's definitely a cover that will attract readers seeking a gritty style of book. It could be worth adding a few indicators of the subject matter to the image, or as a byline.

[FlyingMonkeys]

I like it! I'd maybe post a little small print blurb over the author name stating 'true life story', 'factual account', 'fiction', or whatever the genre is.

[imnotelenor]

I actually forgot to add this haha thanks guys

[Harebellmeadow]

Looks more like The Horrible Life of . . . Maybe a coloured picture unless the book really is about trafficked women 🙁

[imnotelenor]

I could add some colour thanks

If anyone wants a quick read and give some feedback that would be much appreciated. However it's not the finished draft. Thanks in advance

3rd of June 2002

The vibrations of the latest rock and roll track blasting from the radio, descended into the overcrowded streets of Kennersde. This small town was based just outside of Liverpool, and held only 40,000 residents. In this particular street, the chatter of enthusiastic party go-ers muffled the lyrics to the latest song bouncing out of the radio.

The once barren streets, were know chocked full of residents, getting ready for the party of the year! You see; the queens jubilee was a big deal in this small town, if there was a reason for the town too unite and party, then everybody would rally round to make it happen. Especially in this tight nit community, the atmosphere in the air was infectious, as the sun was blazing, bouncing off everybody’s skin.

Nobody cared about smothering them selfs in sun cream of-course, as they were all too bothered about the party being ready for when the kids arrived home from school.

Folk were hanging banners; laying tables, setting the coolers out for the beers, placing a small but proud Union jack flag, at nearly every seat. The streets were transformed, and something only a small community could possibly pull off.

Mothers were handing out bowls of overflowing salt and vinegar crisps. Closely followed by platters of special-buy chocolate and vanilla cup-cakes, while others grabbed the white paper plates and cups, throwing them onto the decorated tables that duplicated down the road.

A cluster of Teenagers sat on the wall outside number six-two; with the radio blasting out the latest, sugar babes song “freak like me”, they danced and sang along merrily. The elder woman would jokingly tell them to simmer down and play some “proper bloody music” as they would chortle and roll their eyes at each other.

This particular scene was set on an estate called Birkcroft., it was full of brick terraced houses. That were built in 1961 when this knew town was created, because of the overspill from Liverpool.

The houses were everywhere, to your left, and to your right. The same looking houses, where all around the estate. With tiny tired front gardens, a small pavement and then within a few steps you were onto the matured stone road, that you have to walk over carefully, too avoid looking like you had just drank twenty cans of larger. Looking in, it was as rough as a dogs bollocks. But to the residents it was home. Everyone knew each other, and of-course each other’s business. On days like today, everybody would join together like one big happy family.

To Birkcroft, today wasn’t just about ‘the queens jubilee’, it was about something much closer to home. Something for over a decade, the residents had been eagerly waiting for.

[Helmetbymidnight]

Love the cover, cool, confident writing, well done!

[imnotelenor]

Thank you so much that's the first but I've showed anyone apart from my husband. Who just says it great anyways ha. Thank you so much

[EmbraRocks]

Sorry to be pedantic barren streets, were know chocked do you mean now choked?

[FekkoThePenguin]

I like it - are the dimensions right though? It looks too 'square'. The balance isn't quite right - I'd male the photo a little larger and move the author name aittle to the left.

[Snowatdawn]

The cover would catch my eye and not many books do that tbh.

[Jayfee]

Good start but you have quite a problem with punctuation, particularly the wrong use of commas.

[ReadWriteDraw]

I’m really keen to find out what happens! Check your tenses as if switches between present and past. Also look up the rules for dropped in clauses and semi colons - easily fixed

[MsJolly]

Good start but you need to check your grammar, spelling and punctuation

Tight knit
Themselves. For example

[JEMSY30]

Lovely cover would def pick it up. Need to check spelling and punctuation though as few mistakes. But in terms of cover it's great

[imnotelenor]

Thanks everyone, you have all gave me such a boost. My spelling etc is awful, I will get it all sorted before I let it go to the public haha

Honestly thank you all so much!

[LegArmpits]

Also, spelling.

[Helmetbymidnight]

Are you self-publishing? Have you not thought about sending to publishers/agents?

[waterhorse123]

I'm afraid the whole piece you've posted is full of spelling mistakes and grammatical errors. You really need to do a good edit of it. Get yourself a few beta readers, join Critique Circle where you can post a chapter a week and get peer reviews which give you lots of advice on spelling, punctuations etc.
Your story is not ready for publication. I hate to have to be the one to tell you this but you need help.

[imnotelenor]

It's not ready for publication yet, I've always been passionate about writing. But my selling, punctuation and grammar, has always been my downfall.

It will of-course be read thoroughly, and re-edited, and re-edited as much ad I can until it's perfect. Thanks for the advice for the forums, will have a look. Thanks.

[CherryValance]

I think the cover looks a lot more professional than many self-published works, so a great start! Definitely has a gritty feel to it. I would also move the image a little more to the middle, just to balance it out.

A couple of other points to consider: as a reader I would be put off by 'part 1' one the cover. It might well be, and if I enjoyed it I'd probably buy part 2. But if I were taking a chance on a new author I might not bother to buy knowing I'd have to buy a sequel, if you see what I mean. Also, the title is quite reminiscent of Marian Keyes' books, or the recent 'Eleanor Oliphant is Completely Fine'. From the title the reader might expect light-hearted 'imperfectness', rather than gritty drug use etc. But your image does offset that impression somewhat.

I am a freelance proofreader (to subsidise my own writing!). If you'd like to message me the text of the passage you've quoted here, I should be happy to show you what corrections I'd make, just to give you an idea. I'm happy to do that as a favour, although I would usually charge £18p/hr for full proofing and some rephrasing for grammatical sense (not full editing), just so you know what it might cost you in the future. I actually prefer work with a few errors to be honest - it makes me feel like I'm actually making a difference!