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Separated parents, me with possible covid symptoms - what to do with DS?

(13 Posts)
Squooka Tue 17-Nov-20 14:41:46

Hello, sorry I feel i should know the answer to this but DS is due home from school in half an hour and I've started feeling a bit odd. Specifically, my sense of taste has started going slightly strange this afternoon - coffee tastes weird.

I've booked a test for this afternoon and DS's dad has arranged to come and sit with him while I go. But should I just hand over DS at the door and not see either of them until I get my test results? DS is 9 and has ASC and can be very challenging. I assume he shouldn't go to school until I get my results, but should he be isolating here or at his dad's? All v. amiable with DS's dad, he was here for tea yesterday. We've agreed previously that should we (the parents) both get ill at the same time he's welcome to come and be ill here, and the least ill person at any given time can look after DS.

Ay advice on how to manage things this afternoon and the next couple of days would be very welcome. In the meantime, I'll carry on reading the NHS pages looking for answers.

Many thanks

OP’s posts: |
MRex Tue 17-Nov-20 14:45:40

Talk to your ex and decide, your DS will need to isolate so he can go with the ex to isolate or both come to stay with you. Hope you feel better soon.

Squooka Tue 17-Nov-20 17:05:41

Thanks @MRex. Had the test, now just need to wait and see. DS is with his dad tonight but will be back with me first thing in the morning until hopefully I get a negative result and he can go back to school.

OP’s posts: |
iolaus Tue 17-Nov-20 17:33:34

If you test positive as you've had tea the day before with your ex he'd need to isolate as well so it would make sense if you get on that well to isolate as one unit to help your son

cautiouscovidity Tue 17-Nov-20 17:37:11

Your ex needs to self isolate too until your test result is back. As he had tea with you last night and he's in close contact with your DS, you're effectively a single household / bubble so you all need to isolate until your (hopefully) negative test comes back.

alreadytaken Tue 17-Nov-20 17:56:31

Loss of sense of taste and/or smell could be a bad cold but is more than likely going to be covid. So if not feeling too bad now maybe cook up a batch of something to freeze if the freezer doesnt already have a good supply.

If you have any vitamin D supplements take some extra now and go on doing so for several days. Hopefully you have seen all the mumsnet posts and are already taking supplements.

If you dont have good supplies of food in check local facebook pages and your local council websites, there will be volunteers who will shop for you.

alreadytaken Tue 17-Nov-20 17:59:38

Forgot - if you have an oximeter keep an eye on oxygen levels. I gather some phones have the facility to check this, dont know much about phone aps. If your blood oxygen falls to 94 for more than a short period speak to your gp (unless you know yours is normally that low) and if it falls below 90 you should be in hospital.

Squooka Tue 17-Nov-20 18:03:46

Yes, DS's dad is isolating as well until I get my result.

Is it still allowed for DS to move between our households while isolating? We both have cars and can drive him from door to door, avoiding anyone else. He (DS) was very unsettled during Lockdown 1, which manifested in a lot of very aggressive behaviour (my hands are covered in scars from him scratching me) and it would be beneficial to all concerned if he was allowed to move between our houses while isolating (only if he doesn't have symptoms, obvs).

OP’s posts: |
Squooka Tue 17-Nov-20 18:06:28

Thanks @alreadytaken. Freezer and cupboards are full, and I've been taking vitamin supplements for a while. Good tip about oximeter, thanks.

OP’s posts: |
Augustbreeze Tue 17-Nov-20 19:29:06

Here's the recently updated government guidance. Children isolating are not meant to move between houses, but that hasn't been made clear and even now isn't being widely publicised:

https://researchbriefings.files.parliament.uk/documents/CBP-8901/CBP-8901.pdf

MRex Tue 17-Nov-20 19:29:49

You have to do your best, but there are allowances made when you have children with additional needs.

www.gov.uk/government/publications/covid-19-stay-at-home-guidance/stay-at-home-guidance-for-households-with-possible-coronavirus-covid-19-infection

*People with learning disabilities, autism or serious mental illnesses

Not all these measures will be possible if you, or those you live with, have conditions such as learning disabilities, autism or serious mental illnesses. Follow this guidance to the best of your ability, whilst keeping yourself and those close to you safe and well, ideally in line with any existing care plans.*

Squooka Tue 17-Nov-20 21:48:29

Ah thanks very much @Augustbreeze and @MRex, that's really helpful. We will do our best to meet the guidelines while accepting that we may occasionally need to move DS between us for everyone's safety and sanity or just drive to Barnard Castle

OP’s posts: |
alreadytaken Wed 18-Nov-20 07:47:56

Really everyone should be asking themself not what a daft government say but what does the science say. Science says that if you are both self isolating because you have been in contact with each other and your son then driving a child between you only adds to the risk if you stop for petrol. If you do that, say, late at night paying at pump and wearing gloves that are either washed at 60C afterwards or disposed of the risk to anyone else is negligible.

Even if the police stopped you they wouldnt want the bad publicity of trying to fine you and it would be thrown out in court anyway because of the special needs.

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