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Age 37 holding off ttc due to covid...anyone else?

(73 Posts)
universal83 Sun 01-Nov-20 12:51:07

I am 37 with a 7 year old so not getting any younger but decided to hold off trying till next year. I ovulate very regularly and so not too worried about my age. I just had high bp and mild pre eclampsia last time so was always in the hospital and idea of doing all that possibly again in such horrid times just seems scary and heaven forbid I miscarry or have an ectopic.

Anyone else holding off?

OP’s posts: |
Merrythought Mon 02-Nov-20 14:49:12

I think that’s really sensible and it has to be a very difficult decision.
Even with a history of fairly uncomplicated pregnancy, I wouldn’t want to be pregnant right now and we will definitely be waiting to see how 2021 plays out.

Ellovera2 Mon 02-Nov-20 14:55:18

I was at the start but then changed my mind. I had 1 mc in lockdown and am now pregnant. Personally I'm enjoying hospital a lot more - no visitors so not lots of people milling about, no ill people allowed so no sitting next to people coughing and sneezing in the waiting room, infact no waiting at all really they like to get you in and out with as little contact with others as possible.
Obviously the maternity section of the hospital is kept separate from the rest. Different entrance and everything.
Totally understand your decision but it's been way better than I expected, even better than normal!

SparklyOwl Mon 02-Nov-20 14:59:50

What are the quality of your eggs? That’s the important bit. I’d also get your husband’s speed quality checked out. Otherwise postponing due to covid, when the reality is that this will not be over next year, might see you childless.

10storeylovesong Mon 02-Nov-20 15:03:18

Obviously it's a very personal decision and you have to do what's right for you. But I ovulated regularly, had no recognised issues (lots of tests) and no issues with DH and took us 3. 5 years for number 2. Personally I wouldn't be waiting.

Mistymonday Mon 02-Nov-20 15:20:13

38, ttc for 7 months - not waiting as age and in fact for me a great time to be pregnant when I can wfh, avoid commute or office politics.

MangoM Mon 02-Nov-20 15:49:43

We're delaying having our second too. I turn 38 soon so I really wish we didn't have to, but I've miscarried twice in the past and don't want to even think about potentially going through all that without the same support. I also have another child in nursery so very little chance of avoiding all contact with the outside world.

I am a little worried that I may end up timing baby number 2 with a baby boom. School places are competitive enough during normal times confused

PrivateD00r Mon 02-Nov-20 15:58:02

It is a very personal decision and I don't think you should be swayed by what others are doing. I will just say that no, I don't think many are doing the same as I am a midwife and we are incredibly busy, clinics are busier than ever.

HasaDigaEebowai Mon 02-Nov-20 16:01:41

I wouldn't be delaying anything at 37 just in case. This could be with us for years.

OhMickyYourSoFine Mon 02-Nov-20 16:07:54

My friend has just given birth, she’s had a difficult
pregnancy and baby was born preterm, she had weekly scans that her oh couldn’t attend, but has said the hospital have been amazing. On the other hand, my brother and his wife who have been ttc for 3yrs have put things on hold, she’s 32 so has time on her side abit more.
I do know from experience that if you’ve had a previous difficult pregnancy/birth they will be extra vigilant with you during pregnancy.
I don’t think we’ll go back to how things used to be, for a good few years if that.

pollysproggle Mon 02-Nov-20 16:08:45

I'm 37 OP and had my baby in June so pregnant pre covid but had maternity care and baby during lockdown.
Baby was my third so have previous experience of maternity services.
Agree with PP that services are better than usual. Everything quiet, clean and on time. I also had a high risk pregnancy and induction and felt well taken care of.

willitbetonight Mon 02-Nov-20 16:12:31

I wouldn't wait for covid. This could carry on for 2 years yet. I was pregnant during last lockdown. I delivered in July with my husband present and I didn't have to wear a mask. I was seen in person by my midwife for all appointments all the way through and monitored well in the hospital. I was 42 when I delivered. Post natal care has been a bit crap but I haven't actually had any real issues and don't particularly want to see the health visitor anyway.

Axlcat Mon 02-Nov-20 16:34:13

My fertility nose dived at about that age and I’m now facing a childless future. If only I’d known. I would advise fertility tests on a fairly regular basis after the age of 35 as it’s so hard to say without knowing what your ovarian reserve looks like etc

ZarkingBell Mon 02-Nov-20 16:40:05

I wouldn't delay trying to conceive at 37 no matter how regular my periods were. The statistics are very very clear.
Covid could be a major problem for years. It might be fine next year but it might also be a long term nightmare.

Delatron Mon 02-Nov-20 16:43:09

I ovulate regularly and I’m 44. I’m pretty sure I wouldn’t conceive easily though (and have no intention of).

If you’re prepared for the scenario that it might be too late for a second child once this is all over? It’s such an individual thing but can take years for some people to conceive. Especially after 35. I personally wouldn’t be delaying if I was wanting a second as you don’t know how long it will take and you could miss your chance.

You could after lockdown get egg quality checked etc.

MummyOfZog Mon 02-Nov-20 16:43:13

Maybe biased as I'm currently pregnant, but I wouldn't hold off until covid is finished.... could take a lot longer than we all think, and you may easily be sat here in over a years' time still in the same place as you are now. You also never know for sure that fertility is okay - you might ovulate regularly but egg quality really nose dives in later 30s as that issue isn't readily apparent unless you have tests.

FWIW we did talk about stopping ttc for a while at the beginning of the year, but quickly realised covid was going to last a while so kept going. I'm now almost 9 weeks pregnant and not too worried about the standard of care so far - had a normal booking appointment, and husband is allowed to my scans etc. now

FTMF30 Mon 02-Nov-20 16:51:26

I really wouldn't wait personally gor the reasons others have said.

Saratustra78 Mon 02-Nov-20 16:52:04

I’m 42 with a DD who is almost 3. I was lucky to conceive within 3 months the first time, but a horrific pregnancy meant I had to go to hospital for different issues every 2-3 weeks. My issues would be worse next time, as I know would my fertility, but 100% I’m not going to put myself through needing that extra special level of care in the middle of this situation where hospitals can’t even deal with basic stuff. I also did suffer A LOT of neglect from many people involved in my care the last time and I would be terrified to need that care now (plus taking care of a toddler, with no one allowed to come and help)

Saratustra78 Mon 02-Nov-20 16:53:34

I should say, I’d be happy to just have the one I have now; that might be different for other people

ErrolFinn Mon 02-Nov-20 17:05:11

I am still TTC as I think this will be around for a long time and life needs to go on. It's a completely personal choice and you need to do what's best for you.

Redolent Mon 02-Nov-20 17:36:18

TTC in March is one thing (it was all new, and giving birth during the first covid winter appeared a stressful prospect to me). Now it might not necessarily be so bad - the vaccine at least may well be rolled out to healthcare staff and certain groups by the time you give birth. That’ll hopefully ease some pressure on the healthcare system.

Good luck whatever you decide.

littlepeas Mon 02-Nov-20 17:50:20

I wouldn’t wait at 37. I know lots of people have babies at this age and older, but the greater risk and potential difficulties post 35 are real and only increase with each year you wait.

Teakind Mon 02-Nov-20 17:54:09

Just to say regular periods doesn't mean everything is ok. It's a personal choice of course but please don't rely on that to think that conceiving would be easy.

I think this is going to go on for a long time. How long would you be willing to put TTC on hold for?

Aquamarine1029 Mon 02-Nov-20 17:56:08

I would not be waiting at 37. It is shocking how fast your body/fertility can change when you get to your late thirties. I was in full on peri by 40, but thankfully I was done having children long before that.

Rudolphian Mon 02-Nov-20 17:57:53

I did hold off at the start.
It took me three months to get pregnant last year then miscarried at 12 weeks.
We've restarted.
I've just turned 37 and dont want to waste anymore time.

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