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Really confused and feeling overwhelmed

(18 Posts)
SpongeCake23 Fri 30-Oct-20 07:34:42

We’ve just gone into tier 3 (West Yorkshire) but I’m confused about how the rules are going to be policed.
Already I have a friend living here who claims she is still going away on a mini break to a tier 2 area of the UK as travel is only ‘advised against’ not banned by law. She’s staying in a hotel with her parents who are from a tier 1 area and because they’ve used their address on the booking, she’ll get away with it.

Secondly, bubbles.
People are going out with a friend or family member saying they’re in a bubble when they’re not officially. But the pub or restaurant can’t prove that and don’t question it either if you just say you’re from the same household.

So all of these rules simply rely on people being honest and following the guidelines , which no one is doing anymore to my knowledge. Most people I know are trying to find a loophole.

I feel like I may be one if the only people still following the rules, I haven’t seen my parents since July. How long will this be going on? sad I can’t take much more.

OP’s posts: |
oatmilkisntsobad Fri 30-Oct-20 08:04:17

They won't be policed and yes some people will ignore them. This situation has been so hard on so many people. The only way to get through it is to focus on what you can control and let go of what you can't. You can control and decide how you want to follow the rules. Who you are putting at risk. What your contribution is to preventing the spread and keeping yourself safe. You can write to your MP with your concerns and questions. You can't force anyone else to do as you do.
The Cummings debacle has made many people change how they follow rules. If he can do it and it's ok then why can't I mentality.

annabel85 Fri 30-Oct-20 08:15:52

but I’m confused about how the rules are going to be policed.

Simple answer: they won't be policed any differently than in any other tier. I.e. they won't be policed.

Mindymomo Fri 30-Oct-20 08:31:59

Unfortunately you just have to think about yourself and just hope that the majority stick to the advice. The rules are not going to be enforced. If we go into total lockdown, the people not sticking to the rules will be the first to complain.

SocialBees Fri 30-Oct-20 08:34:43

Stop worrying about what other people are doing OP. Compliance is lower at this stage than it was a few months ago so if you spend all your time thinking about who is or isn't following the rules you'll go mad.

Grobagsforever Fri 30-Oct-20 08:35:44

Thankfully we're not living a police state so the rules won't be policed in that manner.

If you're able to stick to the rules without causing yourself or family serious hardship OP then do so, what other people do is not your concern.

onemouseplace Fri 30-Oct-20 08:46:50

I feel the same OP. I have friends who seem to include in their ‘bubble’ anyone they or their DC want to see.

I’m just trying to follow the rules as best I can at the moment and not get too down about everyone else.

AcornAutumn Fri 30-Oct-20 10:22:38

“ People are going out with a friend or family member saying they’re in a bubble when they’re not officially”

There’s no official register for bubbles!

giletrouge Fri 30-Oct-20 10:44:42

Do what you personally evaluate to be the right thing and squares with your conscience and your understanding. Try not to judge others. Take your own well-being and happiness into account in your decisions.
This is hard.

BefuddledPerson Fri 30-Oct-20 10:51:48

I would say you have to do what you believe to be right but do judge others who break the rules. I judge drink drivers, I judge those who won't stop socialising just now.

I <blame> the government for the mess we are in, but I definitely judge those ignoring the basic rules around social distancing, not travelling once in tier 3 etc.

I think the example of travelling to a hotel from tier 3, that person is a twat. They've no right to lie to the hotel owner/staff. If I knew which hotel I might tip them off so they ask for the address. I'm pretty pissed off all round now.

I get a lot less annoyed about people needing to work or struggling for child care. But there's a lot of selfish twats about unfortunately.

Grobagsforever Fri 30-Oct-20 14:48:58

BefuddledPerson

I would say you have to do what you believe to be right but do judge others who break the rules. I judge drink drivers, I judge those who won't stop socialising just now.

I <blame> the government for the mess we are in, but I definitely judge those ignoring the basic rules around social distancing, not travelling once in tier 3 etc.

I think the example of travelling to a hotel from tier 3, that person is a twat. They've no right to lie to the hotel owner/staff. If I knew which hotel I might tip them off so they ask for the address. I'm pretty pissed off all round now.

I get a lot less annoyed about people needing to work or struggling for child care. But there's a lot of selfish twats about unfortunately.


@BefuddledPerson

Yes sadly those selfish twats are running the country..

Sargass0 Fri 30-Oct-20 16:51:58

When is your friend going away as the rules don't come in until Monday?

lljkk Fri 30-Oct-20 16:56:43

I despair of this need to identify the "bad" people who are supposed to be to blame for virus problem. We're trying to fight human nature when most transmission happens in residential, care or clinical settings.

If you stop worrying about the "bad people" then maybe you'll find some energy to just follow the rules yourself.

GaryTheDemon Fri 30-Oct-20 17:02:59

Well both of those examples are people knowingly going against the rules and lying to cover it up. We’re tier 3 and our hotel auto cancelled when we went into tier 3 as they had our address and aren’t accepting people from tier 3 areas (they’re in tier 2). I would have cancelled anyway as you’re not meant to cross tier boundaries for non-essential reasons. There will always be some idiots but from what I’ve seen around most people abide as sadly as a result the cafes and restaurants are dead

BefuddledPerson Fri 30-Oct-20 18:00:43

I despair of this need to identify the "bad" people who are supposed to be to blame for virus problem

I don't need to identify any bad people, I don't go out looking for them, but I am entitled to think they are doing the wrong thing if I'm made aware of it - and lying to a hotel owner for a leisure trip is really not right.

Ellapaella Fri 30-Oct-20 18:18:19

This is the reason why the virus is rife at the moment. People make their own interpretation of all the confusing 'rules' and ultimately do what the hell they like anyway.
However, you can't control what others think or do and ultimately you just have to do what's right for you and try not to let the actions of others cause you stress.

SpongeCake23 Fri 30-Oct-20 18:39:40

The person in question doesn’t believe they are lying to the hotel as such, because the booking address is the parents one (tier 1) and as they’re going together she believes the hotel will assume they’re from the same area/same household.

OP’s posts: |
Hayeahnobut Fri 30-Oct-20 18:45:37

Hotel friend is correct, travel is not prohibited.

Are you single? If so you could form a bubble with your parents.

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