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Parent-shaming over sending children back to school

(65 Posts)
KayBee183 Wed 27-May-20 16:22:06

Has anyone else been on the receiving end of quite nasty judgement or shaming for saying they'll be sending their child back to school or nursery on 1 June?

Parent-shaming levels do feel particularly high at the moment...

Do you find it upsetting?

OP’s posts: |
DDIJ Wed 27-May-20 16:24:10

No, I havent, but who have you discussed this with for them to comment?

PickUpAPickUpAPenguin Wed 27-May-20 16:24:25

I've seen both parents who are sending them in and not sending them in shamed. You need to try and 🤷‍♀️ hmm whatever your choice is

ScarfLadysBag Wed 27-May-20 16:27:39

Coronavirus has been an absolute gift to the type of people who enjoy nothing more than being self-righteous twats. Look on the bright side: the shamers are doing you the favour of letting you know they are bell-ends and thus can be safely removed from your life.

Waxonwaxoff0 Wed 27-May-20 16:27:49

I don't discuss what I'm doing with anyone but I've seen a lot of comments on social media along the lines of "why would anyone send their children back to school right now."

cadburyegg Wed 27-May-20 16:28:19

I was called a “dangerous buffoon” on here last night for stating the reasons my 5 yo would be returning to school hmm

ScarfLadysBag Wed 27-May-20 16:29:05

@cadburyegg Was that by Bertie Wooster?! Buffoon grin

Smellbellina Wed 27-May-20 16:29:58

No I’ve seen a lot of ‘do what you thinks best for you and yours’, where have you been getting these types of comments from?

stayathomer Wed 27-May-20 16:34:34

I dont know that I'd go as far as shaming but people feel very strongly about choices in this pandemic. After a few of those conversations with friends I realised people should just be left to rant or justify their choices- it's what they want and need (plus all peoples situations are so different)

DominaShantotto Wed 27-May-20 16:39:55

Seen a lot of it about - or indirect shaming sharing really emotive and factually dubious articles wondering (in that delightfully passive-aggressive way) "how could anyone want their child to go to a school like this?"

I've looked into how the school are managing things, read their policies regarding how they're implementing bubbles etc and mine are going back. Would I rather they were going back in to their class of 30 friends with the curriculum as normal? Yes - but that's not an option and this is the better option of those available for my family and their circumstances right now.

Pipandmum Wed 27-May-20 16:40:51

No but then I've only spoken to my friends about it and we are all of the same mind about it. Our kids are older Y10 and 12 and we are confident in our school's precautions (only going back one day a week initially) and ability to keep apart.
They also have good systems for the lower years so would be ok with mine going back if they were of that age.

Magicbabywaves Wed 27-May-20 16:43:02

Our class WhatsApp was pretty ‘firm’ on its viewpoint that it was too early. Those of us sending back kept quiet on there and spoke to each other.

BlingLoving Wed 27-May-20 17:01:10

I haven't seen it in real life but lots online. I suspect it's happening in real life, people just aren't as blatant about it.

howdidwegetheremary Wed 27-May-20 18:31:25

I read one post on here that said perhaps those not sending DC back are probably worried that theirs will be missing out on something.

They are your DC so your choice. At some point we will all have to try to return to some sort of ‘normal’.

I agree with the reasons for opening as some children will not have the same provision at home as others do. It’s vital.

Uhoh2020 Wed 27-May-20 18:48:32

Yes I've seen from some mums on the class WhatsApp not directly but more indirect comments "like I'm keeping little Johnny safe not sending him out to be killed by a virus " yet the same Mums are having gatherings and also saying they cant wait for the pubs to open and enjoy a night out! hmm

ChippityDoDa Wed 27-May-20 19:01:12

Yes, on our school WhatsAp. Lots of passive aggressive comments about “well, I personally love spending every minute with my kids, I’m not sure why any parent would want this time to end...” 🙄

Alex50 Wed 27-May-20 19:07:30

That’s just awful 😞 my heart goes out to parents with young children, just ignore them, they are either terrified or just self righteous, do what you think is best for your child, better to send now than in September as loads of bugs will be about and hardly any children will go on Monday flowers

BillywilliamV Wed 27-May-20 19:10:11

They are just validating their decision by rubbishing yours! Ignore, ignore,ignore,!

SueEllenMishke Wed 27-May-20 19:15:41

Our class WhatsApp was awful too. A handful of parents shouting about 'health before wealth' ... Parents who are furloughed or SAHP. They're so blinkered in their view and can't seem to see the situation from someone else's perspective. I've had to mute it for my own sanity.

Uhoh2020 Wed 27-May-20 19:21:30

I had to leave 1 group when the comparison was made between sending your child to a class room of 10/15 children was equivalent to leaving your child in a supermarket for 6 hours a day with hundreds of different shoppers! Other comments like I'm not sending my child in because if they fall over no one will help my child and they'll need to clean themselves up when our school have confirmed that would not be the case!
All waiting for September when it will be magically "back to normal " by then.

Legallybleachblonde Wed 27-May-20 19:26:39

My DS5 is going back on Monday. Any decision I make regarding him I base on my gut feeling of the situation. At his infant school, only Reception are going back (not Year 1) and the kids are being put into 'bubbles' of no more than 15, with each bubble having their own drop off and pick up times. The communications from the school have been excellent throughout and based on this and the science, I am happy for him to go back on Monday.

Pippapotomus Wed 27-May-20 19:33:55

I didn't dare put on the class WhatsApp that I'm sending mine in on Monday. I don't have a thick skin unfortunately.

One twit, who has form for being a dick, said 'it's everyone's personal choice about going or not, but [she] actually likes spending time with her DC.'

It's absolutely the right choice for us. We all had the virus here, and DS had a positive antibody test. So the chances are he is fine for at least a few months. He would also massively struggle when he does go back if he is off any longer.

Alex50 Wed 27-May-20 19:40:31

Lucky you, I wish I had a positive antibodies test

BringPizza Wed 27-May-20 19:49:47

One twit, who has form for being a dick, said 'it's everyone's personal choice about going or not, but [she] actually likes spending time with her DC.' good for her.

Ours isn't reopening but I would send mine if it was.

NiknicK Wed 27-May-20 19:54:20

No, I’ve actually had the opposite and had my parents judge me for not sending my ds back to school. He goes to a specialist school so is able to go back next week but he was struggling so much before coronavirus and the school isn’t the right setting for him. I’m WFH so there’s no need for him to go back until September yet my parents think they know best. I’ve also had a few questions and judgements from a couple of so called friends who have chosen to send their kids back. I haven’t judged them what so ever and haven’t said anything negative or implied otherwise yet they can’t seem to understand why I won’t be sending my ds back. So it goes both ways.

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