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Ex moved in to help with childcare. Should I tell tax credits?

(13 Posts)
Nonononon Thu 14-May-20 13:29:52

Thought I'd ask on here before I ring them and get left on hold for an hour.

I've posted about my situation before.
Me and dds dad have been separated for almost 5 years. Since separation he has lived with his mother. Due to lock down he has moved in with us to help look after dd whilst I'm at work (carer) as his mum/dd grandma didn't want dd in her house.
He's just started to get furlough and pays some gas and electric as 'board' but that's it.
He's been sleeping on the sofa the whole time and there's absolutely no way/chance of us getting back together as a couple.
We get on fine and it was either this or I'd have to give up work altogether.

I'm just about to renew my tax credits (and I know some of you will say I should have done this when he every first moved in but I didn't really think about it as didn't think it'd be going in this long and have been more concerned with dieing these past few weeks so forgive me for that) do I need to let them know? He's bearly a lodger never mind a partner, but then, he is dd father so I can imagine them not believing that.
It's shit, I don't want him there any more, he doesn't want to be there anymore but his mum won't have him back until the government says it's safe for households to mix and I need him/her for childcare. And no, he's far too childish/immature to get his own place. So it's my sofa or the Z-bed in my fucking space that want back anyway.

What's the best thing to do?
And please, no sarky responses. It's not needed and I'm on edge enough as it is right now.

OP’s posts: |
Nonononon Thu 14-May-20 14:35:49


OP’s posts: |
ComtesseDeSpair Thu 14-May-20 14:50:12

If it’s very much a temporary thing then I wouldn’t bother even calling. Considering the extenuating circumstances it’s not exactly the crime of the century and I can’t imagine the top of HMRC’s priorities to worry about. Similarly, I’ve moved in with boyfriend for the duration of lockdown but he hasn’t contacted the council to have his single person discount removed because it’s a temporary situation and I’m still maintaining a home elsewhere.

I think it’s more of a concern to you to have a plan in place (including alternative childcare arrangements) for making sure he moves on as soon as rules are relaxed and ensuring he doesn’t take the opportunity to get his feet under the table.

ComtesseDeSpair Thu 14-May-20 14:50:52

Single person council tax discount, that should read.

MrsTerryPratchett Thu 14-May-20 14:53:02

He's not living there. He's stuck there because of COVID. And you're not in a relationship.

This is exactly why people shouldn't tell in their neighbours when they don't actually know anything.

Dazzband Thu 14-May-20 14:54:36

I agree with PP. I wouldn't bother letting them know as it's temporary situation.

Chalkduster Thu 14-May-20 14:57:49

Could you employ him as a live-in nanny?
You might get childcare allowance for this?

Chalkduster Thu 14-May-20 15:03:52

Does his mum live alone now to claim a single person discount with council tax?
What address would he put if he applied for UC or got a job?

Nonononon Thu 14-May-20 15:05:56

Ah thanks so much for the replies!

Yes it's 1000000% temporary. He knows this and he's keen to get back to his house/own life too.
You're right, he's stuck there due to covid this isn't something I ever imagined would happen. Thankfully this past year we have straightened things out and as are both single, it felt like the right choice at the time, and well, it still is the right choice really but we didn't know it'd go on this long!

I mentioned the my worry about the tax credits thing to him yesterday and he said the same, that they won't be worried/have time to be worried about things like this right now. I just get paranoid and don't want to be landed with a huge debt because of all this but then what do I say?
I can't even imagine trying to explain this situation to HMRC..

OP’s posts: |
MondeoFan Thu 14-May-20 15:06:49

I wouldn't say anything if only temporary after all they aren't cutting tax credits even though I'm not working atm as they say online it's temporary so don't need to inform them. I wouldn't make things difficult for yourself personally.

Nonononon Thu 14-May-20 15:07:52

Ah his brotber also lives with their mum so no single person discount for her.
He uses her address for everything as thats where he usually lives, he has a job but is currently furloughed.

OP’s posts: |
Nonononon Thu 14-May-20 15:10:00

I wouldn't make things difficult for yourself personally

This is what I felt like I'd be doing but I also have this gnawing feeling of wanting to do the right thing too -- and not wanting to get fucked over for this is a few months time--

OP’s posts: |
Northernsoullover Thu 14-May-20 15:10:04

You'd be put on universal credit if you told them. I wouldn't say anything. Its temporary, extenuating circumstances.

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