DC using screens most of the day?

[UndertheCedartree]

This is not a criticism post or intended to start a bunfight.

I see a lot on here people saying that while they wfh their DC spend most of the day on screens. And they feel guilty about it and feel the DC are neglected.

However, surely this isn't really the case for most DC. And parents shouldn't worry so much. Surely they spend a chunk of their day playing with their toys, doing arts and crafts/colouring/drawing, playing in the garden (if lucky enough to have one), reading books and doing a bit of school work? There's also a lot of decent tv they could watch or educational games to play on the tablet/laptop.

Of course it must be very difficult wfh with DC but I just think parents should stop beating themselves up about it. I'm not in that position myself but I've been at home with mine while unwell with Covid. So they've had to fend for themselves.

[phoebemakesnoise]

My daughter has the option to do all those things, and does. But will still nag me and swing off my leg until I let her play sodding Roblox.

[Rhica]

I'm struggling with this massively. My son is 3 but will not entertain himself at all. For example I will set up paints but he wants me to paint for him or I get jigsaws out but I have to do it with him. It's absolutely exhausting and more often than not I end up suggesting he watches TV or play on his tablet. Then wrestle with the guilt that it has become so default.

[BubblesBuddy]

I think 3 is young to do things on their own. Yes. Being a parent wore me out more than going to work! They need guidance with paints and it’s learning isn’t it. Most people don’t know what to paint when faced with paint and paper. Adults usually supervise at nursery.

[BubblesBuddy]

He would need guidance for jigsaws too if he doesn’t know how the pieces go already. Would you not chat about it to improve language and comprehension?

[ozark]

mine are 12,9 and 11 and spend most of their day play computer games and xbox while on zoom with their friends.
we have all been very lazy and we love it. making the best out of bad situation and actually having time to just do NOTHING

[UndertheCedartree]

@Rhica - 3 is young to do things independently I would say. But they can learn from educational tv shows/games so try not to feel so guilty. It's not forever.

@phoebemakesnoise - my DD's just got into Roblox! Perhaps make it a reward for having spent time doing other things? I know it's not easy, though!

[NerdImmunity]

Youngest is 3.5 and can play independently with Playmobil or Lego etc but not for long and always needs help with something or just generally wants us to play with him. He has access to colouring books, crafts, magic sand, all his toys, puzzles etc but I'd say iPad or TV is the only thing that entertains him for a decent chunk of time if I need to join a conf call (I'm wfh full time)

[Rhica]

He can do all the jigsaws on his own. He won't even scribble though. Just wants to watch me drawing 🙈. Don't get me wrong I'm not expecting to give him a paintbrush and have an hour peace. But I basically play for an hour then say let's watch tv. Never really done that before. Never mind all throughout the day

[Spinakker]

Rhica: Can you set a timer and sit down with him for the first 5 minutes of the activity and then encourage him to carry on without you after that? Maybe set up a bowl of cut up fruit and cheese etc (healthy snacks) at the table to try and keep him there longer. It's really difficult I know. To offer some reassurance my 7 year old was the same at your son's age he wanted me to draw for him ! Rather than draw himself. I did it and eventually he started getting interested in his own colouring etc and from the age of 4 started showing real talent for drawing and now at 7 he's better than me. This phase won't last forever.

Realistically a 3 year old won't ever play for an hour on his own. Even at 5 years old at primary school their maximum attention on one activity is said to be about 15 minutes. Perhaps look at it in 15 minute bursts rather than an hour play time, an hour screen. You could have 2 sets of 15 min activities where you sit down for the first 5 mins each time with him then he plays on his own for 10 mins then a break with half an hour on the screen for him and free time for you. Just some suggestions here as I've got 3 boys myself. good luck ! This time is alot harder than normal x

[BubblesBuddy]

I might take this opportunity to bargain! You draw something and his side of the bargain is to learn colours and colour in sections. (Which won’t be accurate but it doesn’t matter).

What’s his pencil grip like? Can you do little chunks of colouring? So you work together. Would he prefer chunky chalk and a board? Or chunky crayons? Show him what to do and see if he will copy you and offer a reward - tv.