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Moving to parents

(17 Posts)
Cindyloo20 Mon 04-May-20 10:54:23

Please don’t flame me for this. I’m completely in 2 minds about what to do.
So my husband has to work away for a couple of weeks at the start of June. Have been struggling with PND since she was born but only recently just reached out for help which they want me to take antidepressants. DD is a terrible sleeper and the only thing that’s gotten me through is the help from my husband through the night as I get myself so worked up with the lack of sleep I struggle to cope. So I’m thinking about moving in with my parents for this couple of weeks but I get really anxious thinking about it incase DD catches corona and becomes poorly.
They won’t be helping with nights which I wouldn’t expect them too but I know they will take her for me through the day to get a few hours sleep in. Also everything is a 2 man job with DD because of her severe eczema and constant itching whilst changing clothes/nappy/bathing.
What would you do?

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PurpleDaisies Mon 04-May-20 10:55:14

I would move in without question.

PurpleDaisies Mon 04-May-20 10:55:49

Assuming your parents don’t have health problems that is.

TARSCOUT Mon 04-May-20 10:57:38

Just go, the are certain times when you have to have help and this is one of them. If you've all been doing as much to keep to the rules as you possibly can that's all you can do. To be honest I would have said tryy a couple of days for yourself first but your anxiety is already creeping up so just make the decision that you are going and just enjoy your baby.

Joywillcomeagain Mon 04-May-20 10:58:17

I definitely would!

Cindyloo20 Mon 04-May-20 11:01:59

Thankyou for your replies, I think I already knew what the answer was but I guess I didn’t wanna seem selfish blush
I should of added that my mam tested positive for coronavirus a couple of weeks ago but is fine now and back to work, she works in a care home which also worries me.

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RainbowDash101 Mon 04-May-20 11:07:19

I think that your mother testing positive for corona virus and working in a care home puts a different slant on it. It’s not clear yet, whether having it makes you immune to catching it again. But she’s also working in a risky environment. I think on balance I’d stay home. 😥

Cindyloo20 Mon 04-May-20 11:10:13

Yeah my thoughts also. The other option would be to stay at my MIL house. She doesn’t work and others in the household are working from home.

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MaggieFS Mon 04-May-20 11:20:09

Based on your update, MIL looks preferable.

Bluebellpainting Mon 04-May-20 11:37:24

I think you need to go to your MIL as there is risk to your daughter from your mother despite her already having it as the evidence regarding immunity isn’t clear. I wouldn’t be worried about merging two households though as you are allowed to provide care for a vulnerable person or for health reasons which I would think this is. But that is my opinion and that is the problem with the rules- they are down to interpretation. The rules may have also changed by then anyway. What does your husband do for work? Would work be amenable to him not travelling due to your own health and caring for his child reasons?

Cindyloo20 Mon 04-May-20 11:46:28

He’s in the armed forces so there’s no chance of him staying at home unfortunately.
Thankyou all for your advice x

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DownWhichOfLate Mon 04-May-20 13:00:31

Off topic: what has the doctor said about her eczema? Treating that might help her sleep better.

Bluebellpainting Mon 04-May-20 13:19:00

@Cindyloo20 Sounds like family is the best option but it may be worth him exploring with his boss if he feels comfortable doing so. Particularly if the trip is training related rather than service provision. My OH is armed forces and was always worried about asking to be removed from a trip but when the time came they were really good at taking him off the trip. They may be more understanding than you or your OH may think. That was my experience but maybe I’m lucky, my OH is in a small branch and really did look after us when the time came. Good luck and hope that you get some form of support.

Cindyloo20 Mon 04-May-20 14:12:46

@DownWhichOfLate she’s under a dermatologist, we are hopefully getting tests soon when this is all over, to see what’s triggering it as it’s been pretty bad. She’s had all sorts of different creams, steroids, antihistamines, different ‘skinnies’. Her sleep is only bad when her skin had flared up but it’s so up and down at the moment, so it’s very unpredictable!
@Bluebellpainting Its a promotion course that he’s doing which was meant to be in February but our DD ended up in hospital with a skin infection so it got put on hold then, I don’t think he’d be able to do it again sad

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Bluebellpainting Mon 04-May-20 14:42:24

Very tricky then. I hope you get to the bottom of your little one’s condition soon. Definitely don’t feel bad about going to your in laws if needed. I think if it is better for your and yours daughter health then it is a very valid reason.

DownWhichOfLate Mon 04-May-20 14:51:49

Are you breastfeeding? If so, have you been advised to try changing your diet and see if it helps? But, yes, definitely go to your in laws!

Cindyloo20 Mon 04-May-20 15:22:05

I’m not breastfeeding, DD is on on a dairy free milk and has been since October but unfortunately hasn’t made the difference sad she’s 10 months now.
Thankyou for the advice, you’ve really helped me out here smile

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