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Has anyone else not got anyone they desperately want to see after lockdown?

(33 Posts)
sweetkitty Thu 30-Apr-20 23:05:24

Just that really, people keep saying oh who will you be going to see first after lockdown and there’s no one I’m really missing. We don’t have any close family really and have always been on our own DH and I and our four DC. I have my Dad who over the years hasn’t been great, we see him maybe 3 times a year, if he visits he’s desperate to get away if I phone he hardly asks about us it’s all about him or more about how much he hates Boris and Donald. My SIL is a weird one she’s having a mid life crisis has reached 50 and is a grandma but in denial, she’s never out the gym and lives on kale and of course if you don’t you get a lecture and she hates the fact we’re younger than her (yes really)! Last year we kept asking to visit (we live an hour away) and kept getting excuses so stopped asking.

I have some close friends I’ll see but that’s about it, feel quite sad really especially for the DC having no grandparents.

OP’s posts: |
AppleJane Thu 30-Apr-20 23:44:16

If this pandemic was happening in the future and your DC grown and no longer at home you'd be wanting to see them first. That's me. But if this was happening a few years ago I'd probably be like you.

PumpkinP Thu 30-Apr-20 23:45:13

Yep haven’t got anyone at all to see..

BenjiB Thu 30-Apr-20 23:56:45

Not really. My parents are over 70, haven't seen my dad but I’ve seen my mum a few times when she’s dropped stuff to the house if she’s been out. I’m not a hugger anyway so having a chat on the driveway has been fine.

sweetkitty Fri 01-May-20 00:03:57

Feel odd buying cards for my Dads birthday “To a Wonderful Dad” eh no your alright in that you didn’t hit or abuse me but you emotionally neglected me let me go hungry a lot and live in a mouldy cold house. Now you can’t really be bothered with your grandchildren” there’s not really a card for that.

OP’s posts: |
Excited101 Fri 01-May-20 00:11:34

I feel a bit like that. I love my DM dearly but we chat on the phone, it’s fine. Lots of my friends live far away so I don’t see them very often, I have no grandparents left and other family I’ll just see when I see them. I don’t really miss anyone, and I’m a bit worried I should. I’m lonely from being without a partner but I always feel like that.

gluteustothemaximus Fri 01-May-20 00:12:30

No family. No friends. Everyone I love is here on lockdown with me (DH and 3 kids).

Witchesandwizards Fri 01-May-20 02:42:41

I emigrated to NZ in October, leaving behind my elderly parents - dad is very frail with Parkinson's so even struggles to speak on the phone.

I have flights booked for me and the kids to visit in July but it looks extremely unlikely that this will happen and my heart is just about broken. If anything happens while I am here and I can't get back it will destroy me.

I have another thread in relationships (bit of a rabbit hole so don't read if you are busy!) that explains how unhappy I am here without Covid, this has just pushed me over the edge.

MummyPop00 Fri 01-May-20 02:48:45

Nope. Because as Jean Paul Sartre famously said: ‘Hell is other people’ (includes estranged family members in my case)

Cissyandflora Fri 01-May-20 03:03:02

Me. No one really. I’m seeing the dr tomorrow hopefully though.

Ohffs66 Fri 01-May-20 06:02:01

Nope. I'm quite looking forward to seeing some of my work colleagues and a couple of friends but I'm not actually missing anyone as such. I get on fine with my family but we are not close, I see DM and DB maybe twice a year.

ArriettyJones Fri 01-May-20 06:06:41

I’m getting quite used to video call socialising and could carry on like this quite happily for a good long while as far as talking to people goes. Three of my closest friends are overseas anyway. I do miss cinema and theatre, though.

AfterSchoolWorry Fri 01-May-20 06:10:01

I have my siblings and nieces and nephews, but people in general drain me so I don't care about the rest! 🤭

RingtheBells Fri 01-May-20 06:11:50

Not really, we usually see adult DS about 3 times a year, we speak about every week or two on the phone and it would be nice to see him at Christmas.

DF is estranged and last see him about 4 years ago, no idea where he is now, DMIL is 200 miles away so only see her probably once a year. DM and DFIL are dead now, other family members we hardly see anyway.

DDIJ Fri 01-May-20 06:11:53

Nobody here.

BooseysMom Fri 01-May-20 06:54:32

I love lock-down simply because there's no pressure on us to see family. It's the most liberating feeling but also a bittersweet pill as you know at some point it will end. It feels like a different world now. I won't go into why i don't want to see family as no one is bothered about that but it's a great thread op.

YgritteSnow Fri 01-May-20 06:57:26

I'm not desperate to see anyone. I only ever saw family members every few months anyway as they live so far away so it's not like I had regular contact. I'm locked down with my children and they would have been the only ones I would have been desperate to see.?

YgritteSnow Fri 01-May-20 06:59:14

Not sure why there's a random ? there 🤷🏼‍♀️

onlyreadingneverposting8 Fri 01-May-20 07:05:54

The only person I am desperate to see is my own dentist!!! I've had lots of problems with my teeth in the last few months and had crown treatment out on hold due to covid. I've had a filling gal out during lockdown and I don't want to see a different dentist at some hub!!

Family wise there's no one - don't have a good relationship with them and haven't seen siblings in years. Spent a lot of my adult life moving round so don't really have any real friends - just the ones you have a 5 min conversation with at the school gate.

cptartapp Fri 01-May-20 07:09:00

My parents are dead. I haven't seen my DB in two years, and we only see PIL and my my nephews every 3-4 months anyway. This separation is really no big deal for us.

ImDillDandin Fri 01-May-20 07:12:56

Like a PP, if my DC were still at home (one is, 2 aren't) I wouldn't be too bothered but I'm desperate to see the absent ones. I'm LC with my mother and sister and my brother lives abroad so rarely see him. Will be nice to catch up with a few friends when this is over but there will be no rush.

CeeJay81 Fri 01-May-20 07:37:44

Only a friend. My family are all far away, so used to going a few months without seeing dad, mum or brother. I don't drive though, so I rely on trains and that's what makes me anxious, even in a couple of months the idea of going on a train seems scary.

The only person id like to see now is a friend, miss popping round for a cuppa every now and again. She's my only proper friend really. i go out for a meal with some work colleagues a few times a year but that's it. We did have one planned end of march, so god knows when that'll happen again. I am still working though, so that is my lot of my social life, I'd be lost without it.

I'm more missing not being able to go anywhere outside this tiny little town(would be a village in England), not having a car will add to my risk of contacting the disease after lockdown, which is already high due to my job.

RingtheBells Fri 01-May-20 07:52:00

onlyreading. I also am desperate to see my dentist, my bottom denture is very ill fitting as I had another tooth out and I can’t eat properly with it in, I had planned on getting a new one sorted out about Easter time when extraction had settled, usually involves about 4 appointments for moulds and fitting, I fear now it won’t get done as when they do open it will be difficult to get any appointments. I did see somewhere they would be lucky to open by end of year.

ifonly4 Fri 01-May-20 08:09:40

We are lucky as we've actually got quite a few who want to see us, but it's how we see them with social distancing.

I've seen my Mum every week as dropped off shopping at her door, but I guess she's the first we'd plan to see as she'll need it most having hardly seen anyone for three months.

CromartyFinisterre Fri 01-May-20 08:34:13

There's no one I'm desperate to see. My dad lives with us anyway (which is nice, I would definitely be worried about him on his own), my mum is dead. DP's parents live 100s of miles away and we only see them once a year anyway.

It'll be nice when my sister and her kids can drop round for a cup of tea and a slice of cake again but I'm not sure I'm desperate to see them grin

My friends...well I'm in daily communication with most of my closest friends so I'm not missing them as such. Again, it'll be lovely to see them properly but I can survive at the moment.

MN is terribly over-dramatic about these things.

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