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Am I being stupid?

(18 Posts)
annonxx Mon 27-Apr-20 19:22:33


Partners good friend and work mate has got a bit of an issue, him and his wife have had to leave the house they were in as MIL is in the shielding category and wife works in the local hospital.

They have been staying in holiday let since lockdown but they have to be out soon. My partner has asked if we would offer them our spare room as they have nowhere to go, I'm in 2 minds about it.

Shall I let them stay until the end of lockdown his wife works at the other side of the hospital to the Covid ward so she has had no direct contact (I am aware she may of and not known it) but then me or my partner could of had contact in the supermarket etc? Partner is still seeing colleague as they are working together so they are in contact with each other, I'm not even sure if this is making sense hmm

Any advice would be appreciated.

K x

OP’s posts: |
TDL2016 Mon 27-Apr-20 20:38:22

Regardless of Coronavirus, I’d say no simply because they wouldn’t have a move out date if they moved in with me.

AnneLovesGilbert Mon 27-Apr-20 20:51:13

Ooh no, I wouldn’t.

JKScot4 Mon 27-Apr-20 20:52:49

Do they have somewhere to go after lockdown? Do they always live with Mil?

MrsKypp Mon 27-Apr-20 20:53:11

I wouldn't. Why don't they rent a flat?

Peacenquiet2 Mon 27-Apr-20 21:01:29

God no, that would soon get tedious, I don't like anyone but the people who live here being in my house and even then not 24/7 (like now). It would be a definite no from me

Meredithgrey1 Mon 27-Apr-20 21:03:19

My worry would be that MIL could be shielding for a long time, beyond the lock down. They could be there a while

JKScot4 Mon 27-Apr-20 21:06:40

There’s another thread where OPs Sil/Bil moved in and they’re ready to kill the Bil.
I’m sure they can find a flat to rent.

bulletjournalbilly Mon 27-Apr-20 21:06:51

Agree with others. Whilst it's ok to have them live with you, it would be a no from me OR if they can offer an end date but then I'm prob UR on that as how can they offer an end date.!?

I like my own space too much.

annonxx Mon 27-Apr-20 21:53:04

Thanks for all the replies, I am really edging towards saying no but then I will feel awful that they have nowhere and she is a key worker etc.

They always live with the MIL as they have not long moved back to the area and haven't got there own place yet.

The only thing I can think of is say to my other half they could stay here until they find there own place and give them say a month to do that? I just don't want to look like the bad guy in this! As it must be a horrible situation they are in!

OP’s posts: |
Lunawuna Mon 27-Apr-20 21:58:32

How realistic is that they'll find a place (be able to view it?!) and be able to move in while we're in lockdown? It doesn't seem like a likely thing to happen in that sort of time frame. Their MIL could be shielding for weeks/months yet, depending on how the advice goes.

Fish and guests - good for 3 days. It's far from ideal for them, but you need to think of your own sanity here.

RLOU30 Mon 27-Apr-20 22:05:41

You will feel even worse when your in the position to have to ask them to leave and you will be because it will become drawn out and tedious for you all

annonxx Mon 27-Apr-20 22:17:31

Thankyou all you lovely people thanks
It's going to be for the best to say no! Xxx

OP’s posts: |
RLOU30 Mon 27-Apr-20 22:21:07

Good luck gin sometimes we have to think about our families and this is one of those times don’t feel bad

disorganisedsecretsquirrel Mon 27-Apr-20 22:43:42

On the basis that your husbands work together, I would say yes. There is no corona based reason to say no, only the same reason everyone has. That you just don't want to !

MN probably the wrong place to ask though. Not known to be very hospitable. ..and have a full on breakdown if someone rings the doorbell unexpectedly.. not to mention a full on 500 plus thread about cheeky fuckery if you have the audacity to suggest visiting a new baby before it's 8yrs old. !

Make your choice and own it.. but don't 'blame' covid-19 that's just a cop out.

NotEverythingIsBlackandWhite Mon 27-Apr-20 23:06:55

My ndn has had patients with civid-19 on a non-covid ward. Why would you risk it?

me or my partner could of had contact in the supermarket etc?
But you would have been social distancing in the supermarket whereas in your home you will be in direct contact with a hospital worker.

"partner is still seeing colleague as they are working together so they are in contact with each other"
Is your OH not social distancing from his colleague when they are at work?

"I'm not even sure if this is making sense"
I understand what you are saying but it doesn't make sense to me to take someone into your home unnecessarily who is quite likely to come into contact with the virus.

tumpymummy Mon 27-Apr-20 23:19:02

Personally I would say no but that's because I wouldn't want anyone staying with in my house indefinitely. I would say the same even if the coronovirus weren't around. But with the situation as it is I feel that home is my sanctuary. If they came to stay I wouldn't be able to relax. I would be a big fat no from me, even if that makes me a bit selfish.

AmelieTaylor Tue 28-Apr-20 06:42:14

Make your choice and own it.. but don't 'blame' covid-19 that's just a cop out

Rubbish. Two adults still going out to work, to exercise, to do whatever...obviously it increases your risk of getting it.

That aside though,two people there every evening, every day they're not working...nowhere for any of you to go out for a few hours. Sounds like hell to me.

MIL is going to need to be shielding long after lockdown ends, they're both still getting paid,why can't they rent somewhere? You're still allowed to look at places to buy/rent and to move during LD. I know they've just moved back, but what difference does that make to getting their own place. If they haven't got a deposit maybe you, the in-laws,their employers etc can help then get one together?

It's horrible being the 'bad guy' but better the 'bad guy' now than they shrieking harpy' when they're doing your head in.

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