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If you live alone, how are you coping with the isolation?

(7 Posts)
Destinysdaughter Thu 23-Apr-20 14:14:37

I've had only one face to face conversation with a friend since this began ( she lives 5 mins away and we kept our distance), I'm not working at the moment. The days feel very long and although I have planted some veg and cleared out the pantry, my motivation is very low right now. I have joined our local Mutual Aid group as a volunteer, and delivered some groceries to an elderly couple, which felt good.

I used to do a lot of Zumba classes which don't really work so well online.Im comfort eating and putting on weight. I'm doing Zoom Pilates which are good, and making sure I have a phone conversation most days.

I'm quite up and down, some days I feel grateful for what I have, others, I struggle to just off the couch. I've not seen my partner for 6 weeks and as he's working harder than ever, our phone conversations often feel quite strained. Hardest thing tho, my little sweet cat died last week and that's been really hard to deal with.

I know that this situation is difficult for everyone in their own ways, but just wondered, those of you on your own, how are you coping with this?

OP’s posts: |
FOJN Thu 23-Apr-20 14:49:15

I'm so sorry to hear about your cat. Under normal circumstances we'd get a comforting hug from those closest to us, it must be really difficult to deal with that sadness on your own.

I live alone too. Most of the time it's OK and like you I make good use of the phone but I'm also struggling with motivation, it feels like life is on hold and I can't get stuck into anything because I'm waiting for it to restart.

I'm not as active as usual so feel sluggish and I haven't weighed myself to see if I'm gaining weight, I don't really want to worry about that at the moment.

I do have a dog though and that forces me to get out for a walk, I live in a small town so I see plenty of regular walker's to pass the time of day with which I'm sure makes a massive difference.

I remind myself everyday this won't last forever. I try to set myself tasks to complete each day, no matter how small. There are days when it's been as simple as shower, get dressed, walk the dog and eat.

Sending a virtual hug,

Moondust001 Thu 23-Apr-20 15:02:57

I'm sorry to hear about your cat. I have a dog and he's a source of constant entertainment - and disruption.

Honestly, I'm perversely kind of mostly enjoying it, and have no idea where the time is going! I work, and working from home managing a huge UK anti-poverty initiative. That keeps me busy. But with the "no commute" life I can start early, finish early, sit with my kindle and dog in the garden enjoying the sunshine... I have more time to cook nice meals, and I can even fit in a bit of weekday housework (which I'm normally too tired to do) so that my weekends are almost all mine to enjoy. With the exception of one person, my closest friends and family are spread across the globe, so social interactions are usually via technology; and my nearest neighbours aren't that close as I live in a relatively rural area, so I am used to not really seeing them or really getting on more than a basic acknowledgement if we happen to pass somewhere.

That said, I am one of those people with disgustingly resilient mental health. I think I once managed to get depressed for a couple of hours. I've seen too much in the world to get thrown by much. I think it must be awfully hard for people who aren't as resilient, and that isn't a fault, just a fact - just as some people aren't physically as resilient (and I am not - I am disabled).

CountryCousin Thu 23-Apr-20 15:22:41

Many commiserations on the loss of your cat, OP, that's awfully hard.

I'm not very impressed with myself tbh. Usually I find my own company perfectly tolerable - but usually I'm planning a trip, and considering new things to wear, and trying to meet deadlines ... People to impress and perfume to choose and stuff I need to keep up with far away from home.

Now ... I am self-isolating as I find myself at the intersection of far too many at-risk groups. Thoroughly pissed off to discover that medically I'm on the cusp of being actually old. (Have come to this thread straight from the Topshop website.hmm) Sick to death of hearing about other people's brand new, instagram-able fitness regimes - I'm exercising way less than usual. And have already exhausted my previously inexhaustible appetite for cake. I decided to skip alcohol for the duration of lockdown; it only amplifies whatever I'm feeling, and at the moment I'm mostly horrified, and trying not to become hopeless.

Have scarcely spoken to anyone other than my closest relatives via FaceTime/phone. The only thing I'm currently useful for is arranging food deliveries for them. Groups I ought to be actively involved with have annoyingly taken to FB, which I cannot stand, so I'm being stand-offish.

I am spending too much time on MN and other screen based distractions ...

emmathedilemma Thu 23-Apr-20 15:42:16

ok but starting to crack from looking out at the same view and not getting much of a change of scenery due to exercising locally. I'm still working full time but from home but i'm used to travelling and seeing people at the weekend. I've had plenty of zoom entertainment and spoken to people that i've not spoken to as much in years. I tend to see neighbours and people from the gym if I go out for a walk so just someone saying hello in passing is nice. I'm the sort of person who talks to everyone and anyone, in cafes, on the bus (I could never live in London lol!) so I'm missing that sort of interaction with people. I've had to stop buying wine in any quantity as that was becoming too much of a habit and I'm exercising much less than usual due to the gym being closed and no garden.

Destinysdaughter Thu 23-Apr-20 17:14:21

Interesting to see how you all are coping with it. I find writing a list of things to do in the morning is helpful. I'm limiting how much news I watch now, having obsessively followed it previously. I've bought some nice things for the house online from Laura Ashley and Debenhams who are both having sales and I've devised a Zoom Pub Quiz for my Women's Group tomorrow night!

OP’s posts: |
Bluebellbike Thu 23-Apr-20 17:21:08

I live alone but not isolated as I'm still working (Care Worker). My life has not really changed much in the basic sense. Except shopping being more problematic. I'm missing going out to the pub and extended full day walks. I had my 60th birthday with no real celebration earlier this month.

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