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Why is nobody listening?

(67 Posts)
cantata Fri 17-Apr-20 22:34:15

I have lost my job, my income, my physical health and my mental health as a result of this lockdown (to which I am adhering, before anyone tells me that people will die as a result of my behaviour, and I should just stay the fuck at home. I am staying the fuck at home, because I want this to end).

I am not the only one in this situation. Why is nobody listening to us? Why is everyone going along with this narrative about "the British public is happy to be in lockdown"?

Some people might be. But could someone please, please listen to those of us who are not?

OP’s posts: |
PerkingFaintly Fri 17-Apr-20 22:37:58

It's rough. I hear you.

I know flowers don't fix things, but flowers anyway.

cantata Fri 17-Apr-20 22:38:53

Every bit of kindness helps, Perking. Thank you.

OP’s posts: |
terrigrey Fri 17-Apr-20 22:38:55

I'm sorry to hear your situation is so difficult at the moment.
I guess most people are just thinking of themselves and their own situations, I currently don't know anyone who seems to be really struggling with lockdown, apart from the NHS workers I know who are under tremendous stress, but they have the support and community of their colleagues at least.
I don't really know what to say, sorry

Gooseygoosey12345 Fri 17-Apr-20 22:40:16

It's not the narrative I've heard. I've heard that people's mental health is suffering massively, that people are struggling financially etc. Of course there are people who are happy to be in lockdown (I'm mostly ok with it) but from the media I've seen it's been fairly balanced. I hear you, I'm listening. Unfortunately there's nothing that can be done at the moment. What do you think would help you? (Not meant in a snarky way, trying to be helpful)

Milky77 Fri 17-Apr-20 22:40:29

I'm sorry. I hear you.

Ohnoherewego62 Fri 17-Apr-20 22:40:43

I'm sorry you're struggling @cantata.

It really is shit! What practical advice have you been given regarding the job and financial situation?

PomBearsyummy Fri 17-Apr-20 22:42:16

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

EC22 Fri 17-Apr-20 22:42:40

I’m sorry about what you’re going through. I can see via the news/ press conferences that there is quite intense pressure on the government re the easing of lockdown. I don’t see this everyone’s happy narrative at all.
Coronavirus is having a devastating toll on so many people.

Wilmalovescake Fri 17-Apr-20 22:43:43

It’s a funny one- I’ve heard loads about mental health and people struggling. Who are you meaning? Are they people you can stop listening to?

Tatty101 Fri 17-Apr-20 22:45:43

Sounds like a really tough situation.

I agree with PPs though, everything I've seen is about people struggling with this lock down. Is it possible that your personal experience is colouring your perspective?

ScorpionQueen Fri 17-Apr-20 22:47:56

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CognativeDissonance Fri 17-Apr-20 22:52:42

I've noticed it in the onslaught of tv ads showcasing happy jolly lockdown and it makes me uncomfortable. The message is that we're all in it together when the reality is that we're not. We're all doing the same thing but we can't possibly be in it together when it's affecting us in various degrees, some are faring worse than others and I absolutely can see why you feel like you're being ignored sadthanks

cantata Fri 17-Apr-20 22:58:05

Thank you so much for all your kind replies. I was expecting to be flamed, really.

The work situation is a strange one, and not easy to explain. The short version is that I fall between all the stools, so now have no job, but no income or help either.

To answer those who have asked: the current narrative being peddled by the broadsheets is that the public is actually quite happy in lockdown and will have to be persuaded out of it. This is apparently contrary to government expectations. I suppose what frightens me is that, if the government truly believes the huge majority of people are happy with what we have got, there will be no reason to try to find a way out.

I completely agree with Cognitive's comment. We really are not all in this together.

OP’s posts: |
Vinorosso74 Fri 17-Apr-20 23:01:36

It is tough and yes people are struggling. A friend of mine had a virtual counselling session today. She has had struggles with depression before but I do think the current situation has exacerbated it.
I admit I am also struggling with it all some days others are ok. I do suffer with awful PMT and am perimenopausal at present so not a good mix! Sadly my old school friends always see me as being the one who is always ok so when I mentioned it in a group chat I found some days were hard they all sort of ignored it.
People aren't happy in lockdown. My parents (in their 70s and not bad health wise)are finding it hard.
I think the mental health services are going to need a huge boost to help people through and after these times.

xtinak Fri 17-Apr-20 23:08:38

I'm unhappy being locked down. I should preface this by saying I still have my job, which I know is lucky. But other than that it's not good. I don't feel community minded at all, the opposite actually.

SquishySquirmy Fri 17-Apr-20 23:11:19

No judgement from me.
People are having wildly different experiences of lockdown, we are not "all in it together". I am one of the very lucky ones in terms of the set up I have, but I still have hard days sometimes and I really worry about those who are finding this very difficult for all sorts of reasons.
I am really sorry for your difficulties.

PerkingFaintly Fri 17-Apr-20 23:23:51

The cost to the economy means that finding a way out is very close to top of the government's priorities.

Actually finding that way out is harder. But you can be sure that the government will want things to reopen as soon as possible.

Inthepurplerain Fri 17-Apr-20 23:24:54

No judgement from me at all.

I guess my thoughts on this though are very much- whatever is thrown at me, I still have the opportunity to wake up another day, unlike the thousands that don’t and that’s not even a guarantee.

You will fix this 💐. You’re not alone.

B1rdbra1n Fri 17-Apr-20 23:25:07

The rug has been pulled out from under all of our feet, some people have been lucky and have landed reasonably safely, others have been put into impossible situations, it is very traumatic to be suddenly thrown into an impossible situation, when you are cornered and there is no way out it's normal to feel terror.

Actionhasmagic Fri 17-Apr-20 23:25:25

Journos can write from home I’m sure they are very happy

B1rdbra1n Fri 17-Apr-20 23:28:48

But humans are innovators, ultimately we want to survive and ultimately we understand that we are stronger if we co-operate and collaborate
Remember that necessity is the mother of invention, this is a time of great pressure, a crucible, new things can be born

Sennetti Fri 17-Apr-20 23:30:28

so what do you actually want?

it won't go back towhead we had before, our old 'normal' what is it you want to see?

PlanDeRaccordement Fri 17-Apr-20 23:31:41

“ I suppose what frightens me is that, if the government truly believes the huge majority of people are happy with what we have got, there will be no reason to try to find a way out.”

Don’t let this frighten you. The longer the lockdown lasts, the worse the economy gets. It’s already wiped out 1/3rd GDP and wealth. The government is using all its emergency funds to help people and also borrowing. They literally can not afford to not end the lockdown in line with other countries who are ahead on the curve. Expect restrictions to start being lifted after the next three weeks are over.

SouthsideOwl Fri 17-Apr-20 23:33:37

@cantata I'm so sorry for what you're going through. It's awful. It's tragic for people losing loved ones and I think it's even tougher because it's almost like if someone you know hasn't died as result of CV your state of mind doesn't matter at the moment :/

Just know you're not alone and yes, creating an exit strategy is at the near top of the agenda I think. Deaths will happen unfortunately, dying is what humans do sometimes, as uncomfortable as that is. We need to buckle down until told otherwise and I feel like that time will be sooner than we think. Hang in there cake

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