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18th in lockdown

(36 Posts)
flamingo40 Thu 16-Apr-20 19:19:37

As lockdown had now been extended we will be celebrating my sons 18th just the four of us.
He's had a really rough few years with his mental health and was looking forward for celebrating his birthday for the first time in years with family and friends.
While we are grateful we are healthy I'm a little sad for him.
Lockdown for us has made us realise how close we are and how much we've enjoyed all being together. (Most the time)

I'm after ideas to help make his day extra special.
Decorations are ordered, he's requested certain food for the day and asked us to bake a cake.
I've also asked family and friends to record birthday wishes to send for him.
Can anyone suggest any ideas to add?

OP’s posts: |
BackforGood Thu 16-Apr-20 23:21:02

My dd is 18 (had her birthday right at the beginning of the school year) but she's had 3 friends have their '18ths' since we've all been social distancing.
It is hard.
Are you able to use zoom or webex or hangout or some other platform to get all the family together for a 'party' ?
Not the same, but it it something.

Is it worth making the meal extra special - all dressing up to the nines ?

I know my dd has walked to her friends houses (making those miles her 'daily exercise' and left them cards and chocolate on their doorsteps - just to let them know she is thinking of them really. It is tough.

PumpkinP Thu 16-Apr-20 23:27:02

All 4 of my children’s birthdays have fallen in the lock down sad

BackforGood Thu 16-Apr-20 23:37:46

There's something slightly different about it being your 18th though being able to go out with a legal ID for the first time to get a drink in a pub or go to a club with your mates. smile

PumpkinP Thu 16-Apr-20 23:58:15

True, but any birthday in lock down is shit.

Weenurse Fri 17-Apr-20 00:01:36

I saw a family convert their home, restaurant in 1 room, cocktail bar next room, karaoke another room and night club in master suite.
Would he like that sort of thing?

Ivalueloyaltyaboveallelse Fri 17-Apr-20 00:12:53

It is hard, my DC has autism and finally asked for a birthday party with school friends. Never wanted one before and it breaks my heart we cannot. However I’ve got decorations, party plates etc, presents, cake and cards sorted. Our plan is just to make it a fun day doing things DC wants and after this is all over we’re hold a big fun party with school friends. Good luck OP hope your son has a good day.

flamingo40 Fri 17-Apr-20 08:08:25

Thanks for the suggestions.
We've had other family birthdays in lockdown, but with this being his 18th I just wanted to make it a bit more special.
He missed leaving high school and all that comes with it due to his health. He should be sitting his a levels and was looking forward to all that comes with leaving college too. He's dealing remarkably well with everything. But due to not celebrating lots over the past few years I suppose I wanted to give him an extra special day.
I'll be using some of the ideas given. Thanks so much

OP’s posts: |
Floatyboat Fri 17-Apr-20 08:27:14

Surely just de-emphasise the importance of one particular day in the calendar and have a nice day, making it clear something nice with friends will happen after lock down.

Floatyboat Fri 17-Apr-20 08:28:07

I wonder if you're more bothered about the special day than him op?

flamingo40 Fri 17-Apr-20 08:45:56

We are going to celebrate with family after lockdown.

I posted this thread just asking for any ideas to help make his day a little more special.
I know many of us have had to celebrate whilst in lockdown so I just wondered if any of you had done something I hadn't thought of to make it a little bit more memorable for him

OP’s posts: |
Hercwasonaroll Fri 17-Apr-20 08:46:47

Ask your neighbours to sing happy birthday at a social distance.

TheSmallAssassin Fri 17-Apr-20 08:49:23

We had a Zoom party and disco for a big birthday in lockdown, it worked really well. Message me if you want some tips.

flamingo40 Fri 17-Apr-20 08:52:23

Lovely ideas thank you
I'm sure the neighbours will join in
I'm going to show him the recorded messages from family in the morning, then hopefully do a zoom party with them in the evening with his birthday cake.
That way they can all sing happy birthday
Together

OP’s posts: |
Ivalueloyaltyaboveallelse Fri 17-Apr-20 09:27:00

Nice idea OP. Sounds like you’ve got it sorted.

flamingo40 Fri 17-Apr-20 09:33:07

Thank you. I hope your ivalue
I hope your son enjoys his day too

OP’s posts: |
Breathmiller Fri 17-Apr-20 09:42:17

Have you tried Housparty? Its a fun way to play games together too. They have quizzes and pictionary. We did it with my adult children for Mothers day and it was fun.
I hope your family have a wonderful day.

Unprecedentedusername Fri 17-Apr-20 10:22:26

I had a very significant bday during lockdown. It was the hardest and most upsetting day of the whole thing. Everyone trying to act “normal” and be jolly. People you haven’t heard from in years crawling out of the woodwork. I said I wanted to postpone it and will celebrate at a favourite venue when lockdown is over. I was relieved when it was over. I would do something special on the day but make it clear that the real celebration is at a point in the future. A bit like Trooping the Colour!

flamingo40 Fri 17-Apr-20 11:14:26

Unprecedented I'm coming up to a big birthday too one which I should be in Rome.
I'm
Just going to celebrate later. One big celebration for both of us.
It'll certainly be birthdays we will never forget won't it

OP’s posts: |
MilkNoSugars Fri 17-Apr-20 11:22:10

A new family (board) game to play together?
Special breakfast- my DS requested pancakes.
A delivery of Hettys Kitchen brownies- I was sent some recently, these are the best brownies I have ever tasted!
Zoom/ house party with friends.
Make a collage/ display of pictures of him from birth to now in a nice frame.
Nice walk, somewhere you don't usually go.
Big effort dinner.

Thekindyoufindinasecondhand Fri 17-Apr-20 11:22:49

It's really thoughtful that you want to make a special effort for his 18th! If he likes a certain alcoholic drink you could get hold of some of his drink of choice, turning 18 and being able to have your first legal drink is always important! Make a meal with his favourite food, or do a theme - what was his favourite food as a child? Try and base something around that for a laugh! If possible collect some pictures from when he was little and do a slideshow, he may hate all of these ideas but it's all I can think I would of enjoyed on my 18th!

FoolsLemonTree Fri 17-Apr-20 11:43:56

This might be a daft idea, but would it be worth buying a newspaper on his actual birthday, and keeping it safe so in future years he has a sort of memento of what the world was like on his 18th? As you say, it's a memorable birthday because of the context as well as being 18th!

PumpkinP Fri 17-Apr-20 13:15:41

I like that idea FoolsLemonTree I think that’s a really good one!

flamingo40 Fri 17-Apr-20 14:27:36

Absolutely love some of these ideas thank you

OP’s posts: |
BackforGood Fri 17-Apr-20 17:20:32

I like the newspaper idea too - I suspect when he gets to 40 or 50 ish and starts being interested in a bit or reminiscing, newspapers won't exist any longer.

I also like the idea of getting the neighbours out to sing Happy Birthday. I'd certainly do that for a neighbour in these times - something that is different and positive about these odd times, to counter balance the bad things.

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