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It's OK not to have learnt 5 new languages during lockdown

(16 Posts)
CuntyBumpkin Fri 10-Apr-20 12:14:35

I started to feel guilty reading stories online about people working out every day, reading, baking etc.
I felt like I wasn't making the most of being at home and 'wasting' it.

I beat myself up for not being as productive as I should. I'm working from home Mon-Fri and really don't have any energy at the weekends to do anything. The mental toll that this lockdown has taken means I don't have much of an attention span at the moment.

It got me thinking about how many others are feeling that way.

It is ok to not be using this time to solve world peace. It's ok if the only thing you did was shower and binged watched crap TV.

Now I can spend my Good Friday eating Easter Eggs and not feel crap grin

OP’s posts: |
cologne4711 Fri 10-Apr-20 12:43:51

Lots of people have been furloughed, so do have time on their hands, but there are a lot of people still working like you OP, whether from home or outside - and if they are not doing paid work (and often even if they are) they're looking after kids and vulnerable relatives. So a large section of the population doesn't have time on their hands.

user1493413286 Fri 10-Apr-20 12:49:35

I have no motivation to do any of those things; for the people that are that is great and good for them but my main focus is keeping myself and my children on an even keel. To a certain extent I feel like the pressure of seeing people out doing amazing things has been replaced by the pressure to be doing something meaningful at home although I’m fully aware that it’s my choice whether to take any notice of it or not

covetingthepreciousthings Fri 10-Apr-20 12:52:23

I've been furloughed and DH whilst still working can't do any work from home and only doing p/t hours so we do have the time.. but honestly feel like you, that we are wasting the time.

In reality, we aren't, we have two young kids to entertain and keep fed etc.

We aren't cooking from scratch as much as I'd have hoped, but I have started going on Duolingo to practice languages I haven't spoken since high school, as I find it quite therapeutic to zone out.

I feel like we should be doing SO much more, like I'd love to clear out all the cupboards, but there's no where for any of it to go because charity shops etc are closed so I think emptying them and having boxes everywhere would drive me mad.

Anyway you're not alone OP. I think we're all just doing what we can to stay sane.

GaraMedouar Fri 10-Apr-20 12:54:02

I’m working from home full time, covering a chap’s work who has just left (and no replacement yet) , single mum, trying to home school an 8 year old, keep house going etc - I’m getting even less housework done than normal and no I haven’t learnt Mandarin or Portuguese yet! Each evening though I sit down with DD and we watch a film - we do try to get out for a walk though every other day just for some fresh air and exercise. It’s exhausting!

Dk20 Fri 10-Apr-20 13:02:09

I've been working from home Monday to Friday with 2 kids here. At the weekends I havent done anything because I've been so tired - I've had to do longer hours than usual at work. Even one evening this week ds wanted me to do something with him after work, I was so tired and couldn't bring myself to get up off the couch again that my suggestion was to watch TV with him blush
It's the long weekend now though, thankfully I'm off work until Tuesday so actually have time to spend with my family and do stuff! I did a massive clean in the kitchen this morning and will try to get out for a walk this afternoon. I've suggested that tomorrow we will try to make a cake as dessert for Easter Sunday. That will be the height of my achievements during the lockdown.

managedmis Fri 10-Apr-20 13:21:43

Same as DK20 - it ends up being an 18 hour day here too as you have to wfh at nights after looking after the kids all day!

TheGreatWave Fri 10-Apr-20 13:32:28

Phew, I was struggling with the 5th language wink

In reality I am wfh, luckily DH is able to do the childcare, so no splitting myself in two, but that is my main focus.

In a bizarre way though I am getting on with stuff, especially in the garden, I painted some of the fence today, I don't have that guilt that we should be going somewhere as a family so feel I can get on with jobs that need doing.

Egghead68 Fri 10-Apr-20 13:34:39

Yes it’s ok just to get through it in whatever way you can (even if that means binge-watching Netflix). We are all stressed and in shock to a degree. We can do without putting any pressure on ourselves to “achieve” at this time.

TolstoyAteMyHamster Fri 10-Apr-20 13:40:43

I am reading/learning/doing way less than I used to. But I have a full time job which has become considerably more stressful since the office was shut, I have teenagers who need a lot of parenting right now and my volunteering commitments have ramped up due to the situation. I have elderly parents nearby who used to be self sufficient about shopping etc but now need help. I am planning and providing 14 meals a week (with help from the teens) compared to a maximum of five before all this and making sure the cleaning is done (previously, our cleaner came twice a week).

If we come out of this alive, solvent and speaking to each other I will consider that a win. I refuse to feel guilty about not writing a masterpiece or sewing a new summer wardrobe. I don’t think anyone else needs to either. Getting through the days is enough.

CuntyBumpkin Fri 10-Apr-20 13:41:22

I'm so glad I'm not alone.

People on my Facebook are showing the results of their productive days and how much they are enjoying a new slower pace of life.

In reality it's just not like that for so many people.
It's time like this that Social Media is more harmful to my mental health because it has a habit of making me feel inferior.

OP’s posts: |
StillMedusa Fri 10-Apr-20 13:43:55

I'm crocheting a blanket!
My house still needs tidying, but with 5 adults coming and going (I'm the only one not still currently working) it's like painting the Forth bridge.. so I do the basics, keep on top of the laundry and I crochet, play guitar and walk the dog!
I do have garden stuff to do but I'm currently no 186000 in the B+Q virtual queue!

FindHimForThreeKillHimForTen Fri 10-Apr-20 13:50:43

It's ok if the only thing you did was shower and binged watched crap TV.

Honestly, that's not OK. It's awesome - you're already ahead of me for having the shower grin

CuntyBumpkin Fri 10-Apr-20 13:53:30

FindHimForThreeKillHimForTen

gringringrin

OP’s posts: |
Wingedharpy Fri 10-Apr-20 14:18:23

I find that lockdown has made me very "lazy".

I'm retired anyway so don't have to cope with home working or educating and/or entertaining small children, lockdown or not.

Speaking to 2 friends this week (by phone), they said the same thing and we decided it was because all our "deadlines" have been removed.

We've no days booked up to meet folk/have visitors / have workmen in/ appointments of any description so just feel that the usual feeling of "I must do x, y, z today because I've got a, b, c and d coming up next week" - all that has been removed and we've fallen into manana mode.

Even as a retired person, this all feels very different.

Some days, I've not got dressed until 5pm!

CheesyHousePlant Fri 10-Apr-20 18:09:51

Oh good as I have been feeling crap! Also wfh full time, last week was awfully stressful for many reasons and I am so tired after a heavy period.

I stocked up on chocolate and have eaten a box of chocolates, picked up a prescription today and that is it. Just told someone too tired to talk! When I am just on mumsnet and considering a nap. I have eaten breakfast and lunch so that is a win.

Off for a nap followed by dinner and probably a bath and book. Mental work can start again tomorrow.

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