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Feel so stupid

(12 Posts)
Stupidandmiserable Thu 09-Apr-20 12:22:07

Not sure what I want amount of Thai thread really, just to share my misery I guess. I know no-one can give me an answer.

DP is highly vulnerable so we've both been shielding as much as possible. I can't completely (pregnant so have to go to appointments) and after each appointment I've been isolating myself from him for a week (should be more I know but that's another issue) - staying in the spare room, not using the kitchen or living room etc. The current isolation period should end tomorrow. Anyway, this morning our supermarket delivery came and the driver asked if I could give him a hand to carry stuff, so, without really thinking, I went over and took some bags.. he handed them to me and spoke to me while he did it (which I wasn't expecting) so I've basically screwed up my quarantine period and don't know if I should isolate myself for another week sad. I know it's not the end of the world but it is MISERABLE isolating from DP, but what if I don't and then I've got it and DP catches it? sad Urg. Just really kicking myself..

Anyway.. not really looking for answers or anything, just sharing my misery and self hatred..

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Stupidandmiserable Thu 09-Apr-20 12:22:53

Not sure what I want out of this thread

God, I am stupid.

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rottiemum88 Thu 09-Apr-20 12:25:19

No point kicking yourself over this to be honest OP, what's done is done.

Out of interest, if your DH is the vulnerable one, shouldn't he be the one isolating (e.g. to one room of the house) from you, not you having to hide yourself away? That doesn't really make sense to me

Stupidandmiserable Thu 09-Apr-20 12:28:16

@rottiemum88for most purposes it amounts to the same thing.. the biggest thing is the kitchen though.. he's doing all the cooking and then serving to me (lucky me!), I couldn't really so the same to him in case I've unknowingly got the virus.

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Spied Thu 09-Apr-20 12:32:46

What an idiot of a delivery man.
He shouldn't be asking for a hand and I'd be tempted to report him in case he delivered for us again.
I do however think at this horrible time we are feeling extra extra on-edge and I don't think you need to start over.

Stupidandmiserable Thu 09-Apr-20 12:36:11

Yeah, it was stupid if him but I don't really feel I'm in a position to criticise.

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CatherineOfAragonsPomegranate Thu 09-Apr-20 12:38:55

What is your husbands vulnerability if you don't mind saying OP?

Stupidandmiserable Thu 09-Apr-20 12:47:34

@CatherineOfAragonsPomegranite - He has an autoimmune disorder and takes immunosuppresant drugs. On top of that he is recovering from CFS and trying really hard to get as well as he can before the baby comes.. so even if the virus doesn't hospitalise or kill him it could really knock him back in his recovery which would have a massive impact on our lives. Gah!

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CatherineOfAragonsPomegranate Thu 09-Apr-20 13:20:08

Ahh so sorry to hear that. In any case you really shouldn't blame yourself for slipping up. You're not stupid but it takes considerable time for us to adapt new behaviours when we get used to doing things a certain way.

If it helps, I ordered pizza yesterday, heard the guy approaching the door. Didn't bloody think, just instinctively opened the door. Guy had been attempting to leave food on doorstep but no, I reach forward all stupid smiley face and 'retrieve' the pizza from the bag. It wasn't until I saw his look of annoyance that it occurred to me what a div I was. Was really annoyed with myself. But I did it on instinct! Loads of people will fkup so you're not the only one. Plus he shouldn't have asked you to help anyway!

I also have Asthma, auto immune thyroid disease, fibromyalgia and CFS and I had the virus.

Now, this is just me, also the crucial thing is I am not taking immunosuppresents though I'd love to. But I caught it and 16 days later I'm not too bad. Up and about. I'm really surprised.

My point is you have to cautious, but no one knows how it will affect them. Contrast myself with my fit (kick boxer trainer) no underlying conditions ex (who gave it to me) he is still in bed and on day 21. Has had the ambulance out.

So try not to forward predict the worse and be easy on yourself and congrats on your pregnancyflowers

CatherineOfAragonsPomegranate Thu 09-Apr-20 13:27:29

Just thinking that actually doesn't sound reassurring.

The point I was trying to make is it doesn't necessarily follow that underlying condition=will die or suffer worse.

I know several people one with lupus who has recovered with no hospital intervention and one who is still in jospital with no underlying condition.

Sorry if I'm digging a hole here. Basically hopefully nothing will come of your faux pas but even it does, nothing about this epidemic is your fault or all within our power to manage despite the best of our intentions. So please do not let anxiety result in you blaming yourself. I'm sure like many, you are doing the best you can and being pregnant at the same time!

Stupidandmiserable Thu 09-Apr-20 13:30:33

Thank you CatherineOfAragonsPomegranate - really appreciate your reply and really glad to hear you're doing ok after having had the virus smile

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Stupidandmiserable Thu 09-Apr-20 13:31:52

No worries @CatherineOfAragonsPomegranate - I took it as intended.

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