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16yo DD breaking lockdown

(10 Posts)
Schmedz Sat 28-Mar-20 17:45:45

I discovered my DD today met up with a friend for a long bike ride and they hugged each other goodbye as usual. The dog was growling so I went to the door when I realised they were together.

I am asthmatic and taking the advice to stay home seriously seriously - both my children know how serious things are in the world at the moment (and the particular danger I would be in if contracting the virus) and yet she chose to behave like this (and I think has been seeing friends on other 'bike rides') she has been taking in past days.

I cannot believe she is so irresponsible and when I challenged her on it, she refused to take any responsibility. I realise teens are egocentric with underdeveloped pre-frontal cortexes, but this utter lack of concern for anyone else has upset me deeply.

What advice do other parents have for me in trying to deal with this?

OP’s posts: |
twinnywinny14 Sat 28-Mar-20 17:53:09

If at 16year sold she cannot be trusted to follow the advice and do as asked then she cannot leave the house anymore. Whether you put this to her and and try to educate her and give her another chance or not is up to you x

TheCanterburyWhales Sat 28-Mar-20 17:54:24

Show her some videos from Bergamo?
Ground her.
Take her phone off her.
Lock the bike away.

The possibilities are endless, and you're in charge, not her.

Aquamarine1029 Sat 28-Mar-20 17:56:33

Time for major consequences. If she chooses to act like a daft child, great her like one. No phone and no going anywhere. If she has no regard or respect for your health, this is the price she pays.

Isadora2007 Sat 28-Mar-20 17:58:25

Agree she can go on a bike ride but to stop the hugging? Realistically the bike ride with a friend isn’t going to make her closer than the advised 2m and it might keep her feeling like she isn’t imprisoned quite so much and a compromise.

Zippyx Sat 28-Mar-20 18:08:46

Ask her what she intends to do if you died tomorrow.

Depending on her response, take her phone and/or bike.

lenaperkins Thu 30-Apr-20 18:20:48

Resurrecting this thread as my DS has run out of the house to see his friends.

Not only that he's got a fucking bus. No gloves, no sanitiser. And no, in case anyone asks, he wouldn't give a toss if our whole family died. That's what he'd say anyway.

I tried to stop him running out of the house, but as he's a foot taller than me, that wasn't going to happen.

Do I phone the police? What do I do? Any ideas?

Schmedz Thu 30-Apr-20 22:38:10

So sorry to hear your struggle. I really wish the police had caught my DD and had a stern word - nothing I say seems to make a difference but she might listen to an authority. If I knew she was meeting a group of friends and where, I would definitely have called the police.
You have a lot of people on your side lena

OP’s posts: |
Isadora2007 Thu 30-Apr-20 22:40:32

I would discuss options for my teenager to socially distance with one friend on his or her daily walk. Or let them get a job or volunteer with a friend. It seems odd that people can see others at work if not working from home, or can be alongside strangers in supermarkets but can’t see friends for a walk. So I’d let them accidentally be having their exercise at the same time as a friend.

Andi2020 Thu 30-Apr-20 22:42:26

@lenaperkins is your ds home yet.
What age is he.
It is very hard for everyone

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