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Too scared to get pregnant.

(2 Posts)
foreveroptimistic Wed 17-Jun-09 13:15:13

I have a lovely ds who is nearly 5 and we are ttc no2 we are being investigated by the fertility clinic as we have been trying for a while and things aren't quite right.

I really do want another child, our family doesn't seem complete and I want ds to have a sibling. However I worry (to the extent that I don't sleep) about ds and our yet to be conceived child falling ill or dying. sad I feel that I'm not pregnant for a reason and that having a second child would be selfish and that we are tempting fate.

The awful tragic story of the couple who jumped from Beachy Head struck a chord with me. If ds died I couldn't face a life without him but if we had another child we be forced to endure the pain of carrying on. Given that I feel this way would it be advisable to stop ttc and concentrate on the child that we have? Will ds feel he has missed out if we don't provide him with a sibling?

moopymoo Wed 17-Jun-09 13:24:27

you sound very torn ,and as you know only you can answer these questions. Am always banging the counselling drum here as I am a counsellor but some talking therapy that offers a nonjudgemental space for you to explore your hopes and fears foryour family might really help you see a way through. fwiw i, like most of us, was deeply touched by that story of the couple and could also see that I would feel that way if something happened to one of my boys.

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