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getting frustrated and diheartned with possible blocked tubes

(2 Posts)
stuckLM Mon 15-Jun-09 11:22:31

hello my name is Laura and me and my partner have been trying to conceive for two years and 2 months. Since we fist started trying i have always felt that there may have been something wrong. Within the first couple of months we think that i may have miscarried as i had a very bizzarre 'period' it was really painful and had huge clots in it (but i will never know).

Following this we just carried on trying and it took me another 2 years to become pregnant(april 2009) at first they thought i had miscarried and then when they finally did a scan and we found out i was six weeks pregnant but it was an ectopic. I had a laproscopy to remove the ectopic and my left tube.

I had a follow up appointment a copuple of weeks ago and my mind is full of questions. The doctor i saw was extremely negative and didnt really offer us much hope at all. He told me that it was a right mess down there and that i had lots of scar tissue and that everything was everywhere. i think he said y bowel was under my tube or something i dodnt know. they also removed a large ovarian cyst on my right ovary. (i still have both my ovaries which is good i suppose). the surgeon seems to think that my only remianing tube could be blocked as well. i gotta have a lap and dye to see if this is the case.

I think the tube is blocked as it took us so long to conceive and i am still young. i have read at it does take some woman 2 years to conceive but i just have a feeling. and i am sure the surgeon wouldnt have been so negative if he thought we had a chance.

i just dont know what to do anymore its to hard for my partmer to talk about at the moment. and my family just dont seem to grasp the concept at all. i can understand why my partner feels so sad because i do to but i need support and he told me last night that i more n less couldnt talk to him as it made him feel miserable. i really need some help at the moment and was hoping that some of you could offer me some support that i really need at the moment.

ihearthuckabees Mon 15-Jun-09 16:01:24

Hi stuckLM, so sorry to hear about your difficulty conceiving. It sounds as if the surgeon hasn't really helped matters by not explaining what he found very well. The lap and dye procedure should give you a clearer picture of what's going on.
I have had a similar experience to you, although I already had my DS. My tubes are also very damaged and very scarred, probably due to a difficult CS birth with DS (although they can never say for sure what the reasons are). I had the lap and dye procedure, and it gave the surgeon a reasonably clear picture i.e. showed that my tubes were very likely both blocked.
I was told that I would be a good candidate for IVF given that my ovaries were OK, and DH's sperm was also ok. (The only reason I couldn't conceive was the damage to my tubes). I decided not to go ahead, but if your hunch is correct, and it is your tubes that are the problem, you may also be offered this option and have a good chance of getting the treatment on the NHS (as you're young and (I'm assuming) don't have other children). Hope this offers you some hope, and also your partner.
I found that not knowing whether I could conceive was harder than knowing that I couldn't, IYKWIM. Once I knew, I could decide what to do about it, and it felt like I was making a proactive choice not to have IVF, rather than everything being in the hands of fate. I'm not saying it was an easy choice - it wasn't - and it has taken some time to get used to the situation, but at least I feel in control as much as I can be.
Hope this helps. Let me know how you get on. Hope your partner can be there for you.

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