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Anyone with a similar experience?

(11 Posts)
wendy11 Tue 18-Jan-05 17:37:12

After trying for a baby for about two years we decided to look into why we had been unable to conceive. Various tests and procedures later we were classified with unexplained infertility. The next step was IUI - four unsuccessful attempts later and by now completley disheartened we were placed on the IVF waiting list. We received our letter in April 2004 to let the clinic know when my May 2004 period arrived so that we could start treatment. You can imagine our shock and delight when my period did not arrive and we discovered I was pregnant having conceived naturally after almost five years of trying. Everything progressed normally, apart from the awful sickness morning, noon and night but we figured this was a small price to pay to have our much longed for little baby. At our first scan at about 14 weeks all was well, the baby was growing well and moving around. At the second scan at 21 week there was very little fluid around the baby although he was still growing well and the heartbeat was strong but there was a question mark hung over whether there was any renal function in the baby. After the longest weekend of our lives from Friday to Tuesday we got an appointment at the day obstretics unit in the RVH, Belfast. At that appointment it was copnfirmed that our darling baby did not have any kidneys - a condition know as Potters Syndrome. Our consultant told us this condition was not compatible with life and we would have to make a decision as to what we were going to do. Our little baby boy, Adam was born on Friday 24th September at 02.10am weighing 1lb 1oz and measuring 28m, the day befor my 34th birthday. We were and are completley devestated by our loss. Some days the pain is almost too much to bear, other days we cope better, but we just take each day as it comes. The only thing that keeps us going is that we believe God had greater plans for Adam in heaven than we ever could have had for him here on earth and that we wll always have a little angel waiting for us in heaven. We are now at the stage of thinking about trying for another baby, but our GP has not given us much hope as whatever caused our infertility inteh first place has not gone away. We have been back to see our IVF consultant and we find that we are still eligible for two IVF attemps on the NHS, so we are back on the waiting list but dear knows how long that will take. All we can do in the mean time is keep trying and hope we conceive again naturally although I don't believe we will which probaby doesn't help the situation. Sorry this is so long but it is a rather long story. I would be glad of any comments.

womba1 Tue 18-Jan-05 17:43:44

Wendy, i haven't got anything constructive to say to you, but just wanted you to know that i'm thinking of you and your dh and sending you warm wishes x

hester Tue 18-Jan-05 17:47:26

Oh Wendy, that is heartbreaking. I am so sorry that this happened to you. I am glad, though, that you are dh are finding a way to make sense of what happened, and of keeping Adam in your hearts.

I don't think I can offer any useful comments. Perhaps just that 'unexplained infertility' can mean everything and nothing. I am sure you are exhausted and traumatised at the thought of 'starting again', but it did happen once, you are still relatively young, and IVF success rates are getting better and better. I so hope you get your baby soon. xxx

GRMUM Tue 18-Jan-05 17:52:41

Thinking of you and your husband - you have been through so much.Best wishes for the future xx

wendy11 Tue 18-Jan-05 18:04:40

Thanks everyone. It is good just to be able to put down all that has happened and I know from popping in and out of other threads that you are all so caring. Wishing you all good luck.

runtus Tue 18-Jan-05 18:24:26

Wendy - again no advice or useful info I'm afraid but I hope you feel better now you have actually wirtten it down and it is out in the MN open. Feel free to join the TTC thread and we will welcome you with open arms.we are all in this together and just knowing you are among frineds makes the whole thing so much more bearable.

hester Tue 18-Jan-05 18:26:56

Yes, do join us, Wendy - whenever you feel ready. There is a whole range of experiences on there and you will be warmly welcomed.

Yorkiegirl Tue 18-Jan-05 18:36:35

Message withdrawn

Slink Tue 18-Jan-05 19:14:02

Big hug to you and your DH xxxx

munnzieb Tue 18-Jan-05 19:17:06

oh honney ((((hugs))) don't really have anything constructive to add, but my heart is with you both.

MrsFogi Wed 19-Jan-05 14:56:16

wendy11, I just wanted to say I am so so sorry that this happened to you and to wish you all the best ttc (be it naturally or by ivf). You may wish to put your post on the miscarriage/bereavement thread as there are many wonderful people there who may have had a similar experience but who no longer read the conception threads.

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