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Wasted my FRER at 9dpo

(116 Posts)
tulips87 Wed 17-Feb-21 10:03:57

I promised myself I wouldn't! But I woke up this morning feel awful, so off I went and POAS and at 9dpo it was a BFN. AF is due in 7 days.
Why do I do this to myself!!
I'm annoyed now and just really disappointed. But the last few days I have felt so tired, off food and sick so I sort of had convinced myself I was. I've set myself up for a bad day. Sorry for the rant!

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heybabes Wed 17-Feb-21 10:08:22

Oh no! Don't worry - did the exact same thing. I told myself this month I wouldn't test until AF or unless I had some really "out there" symptoms. I, like you, have been feeling a bit off recently. Had some really bad nausea around 5/6DPO and sore nipples. But no - a BFN!

I have seen that lots of people get a BFN on 9DPO and go onto have BFPs, it's still pretty early of course. You're not out until AF shows!

missrose0110 Wed 17-Feb-21 10:09:00

Ahh I feel you! I'm 10dpo and it's so hard to resist the urge to test.

When are you thinking of testing again? Happy to keep you company smile

incywincyspiders Wed 17-Feb-21 10:09:14

I just did the same at 10dpo. I have been feeling sick/heightened sense of smell and sore boobs these past two days. Now convinced I'm out 😢 TTC is such a cruel journey sometimes.

mum2bin2021 Wed 17-Feb-21 10:15:36

I did exactly the same as you. Tested early, got a negative and thought oh well, another one bites the dust. A few days later, I was then late and took another test, thinking I was being indulgent and wasting another test - until I turned it over and there was a big fat line. Testing early doesn't benefit anyone as it can lure you into a false sense of thinking you're not pregnant and then going and drinking loads of wine (me blush) when actually you are pregnant. Whoops. Either way, I'm sending lots of baby dust your way!

tulips87 Wed 17-Feb-21 10:18:08

@heybabes it's so frustrating. I went to bed strong last night, no urge to test at all and woke up weak, it's a crazy rollercoaster and I'm convinced our body's play tricks on us with these symptoms! How many dpo are you now?

@missrose0110 I don't think I want to test again unless AF is late. I'm convinced I'm out now so planning for next months BD'ing already hahaha. When are you thinking of testing??

@incywincyspiders it's horrible isn't it! I wish I was one of those people who doesn't think about it, or obsess over it all the time, are the people out there like that though?? Surely the symptoms aren't just in our head, I know what I feel and it's definitely off.
Like heybabes says, we aren't out till AF shows, hoping that will help us through!

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tulips87 Wed 17-Feb-21 10:19:42

@mum2bin2021 congratulations on your BFP!And thank you for taking the time to give us a little bit of hope!! ♥️
Out of curiosity, hope early did you test?

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incywincyspiders Wed 17-Feb-21 10:25:44

It's so frustrating. I paused TTC for a few months but overall we have been trying for 11 months (but only 6 cycles). For the past two cycles when we restarted trying I've been so good in at least waiting til 12dpo. The first one I didn't test. Last month AF was two days late (although I think this was because I've managed to lengthen my LP by taking vitamin C). So I took one at 12dpo (day before AF) and when that was negative I knew that I was out.

I told myself this month I would wait til AF but then the last few days I've been so sick and sore boobs, I was convinced i must be pregnant. But no sad

Everywhere I look there seems to be pregnancy announcements and I'm really starting to struggle sad

incywincyspiders Wed 17-Feb-21 10:28:04

Sorry I just realised that's confusing 😂 we tried last year March/April/May. Then we bought a house so paused then began again in December/January/February.

heybabes Wed 17-Feb-21 10:44:24

@tulips87 I know right? I'm 9DPO the same as you, got the negative test today. Have had loads of typical symptoms and kind of convinced myself that this month seemed like "it". Oh well.

I also got the start of a cold today so maybe that's why I feel off... also looked it up and that's an early pregnancy sign too! What a joke haha.

If it helps, I got pregnant by one accident with an ex-boyfriend about 8 years or so ago (decided not to have it unfortunately) and didn't have many symptoms leading up to it, I just remember I kept feeling that I had period pain but no period.

hopefulTTC2021 Wed 17-Feb-21 10:51:44

I know how you feel, it’s so hard to not test when the stick is basically staring you in the face (through the bathroom door).

I wasted tests at 8, 9, 10, 12 and today at 13DPO. All BFNs and running low on sticks now! but feeling fatigue, out of breath from the stairs and getting stomach aches after meals. It’s so confusing confused

tulips87 Wed 17-Feb-21 10:56:26

@heybabes it's so easy to convince ourselves. Especially when we have google to hand!
I have had 4 pregnancies and all of them I have conceived straight away. 3 ended in mmc all at 9 weeks but even still, I got pregnant right away which is why this is becoming more frustrating I'm now very impatient although only on 2nd cycle of TTC this time. But it feels like forever when you're in the TWW.

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bitheby Wed 17-Feb-21 10:56:59

Don't worry. I've used loads this month. Haven't bothered since about 12dpo but thought I saw a shadow on an internet cheapie this morning and my period is a day late so tested again with a FRER. BFN. I'm definitely not pregnant. I just want it so much and at least it gives you some information. It's not really wasting them. It's telling you something that you can then process emotionally.

Fingers crossed for a good result for you.

heybabes Wed 17-Feb-21 11:05:52

@tulips87 oh wow, I'm so sorry for your losses - that sucks. I know it doesn't seem like a positive and it must have been really hard to go through, but one good sign is that you are getting pregnant. Have you been able to find a reason for the MMCs?

I can see how it would be extra frustrating to look out for the BFP now! Have you had the same symptoms every time you've got a BFP? Did you find out on 9DPO before?

This is my second cycle. I'm trying to hold out hope that I got pregnant before that it's not a no-go (my SO has a kid from a previous relationship so hopefully things good his end too). I am much older than before but only 28 so FX!

mum2bin2021 Wed 17-Feb-21 11:38:52

Thank you OP! I tested about 3 days before I was due, so around 10 dpo (I wasn't tracking ovulation though so can't be sure)- I did a first response test that was supposed to let you know up to 6 days before your due date and it was negative so I thought no more of it. I'm now 35 weeks so it was a healthy, viable pregnancy too - I ovulated late as confirmed by my due dates by being due 6 days later than I thought.

Good luck everyone, I only conceived after 'giving up' tracking etc after getting fed up after 8 months of TTC and not dealing with the disappointment well. It's so hard but keep the faith! Good luck everyone x

mum2bin2021 Wed 17-Feb-21 11:47:04

Just saw your post about your miscarriages OP - I'm so sorry for your losses. Sending you lots of positivity, baby dust and luck thanks

tulips87 Wed 17-Feb-21 11:47:23

@heybabes thank you. Yes it wasn't easy at all, the hospitals just want to get you out and don't give you much information, they just say it happens to a lot of women and expect you to accept it. It can make you feel like you're all alone though.
But since TTC this time and being on this forum, you see that it really does happen to a lot of women so it helps personally.
It wasn't investigated as they weren't consecutive.
Now I'm nearly 34 so age isn't exactly on my side like it was before!

At least you know you can get pregnant and that's a really good sign! 🤞🏼🤞🏼
When is AF due for you?

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heybabes Wed 17-Feb-21 16:10:02

@tulips87 that sounds so awful! I would want to know everything. But like you said, after reading through a lot of TTC forums, it is pretty common. Still absolutely sucks though.

Also, 34 is still pretty young!

My AF is due on Tuesday (23rd) so still have a while, I just think when I see all these people posting BFPs at 8/9DPO then it must mean I'm out. I'm going to try and wait until at least the weekend now though, so I will be 12 DPO and then I know it will be pretty definitive then.

What about you?

missrose0110 Wed 17-Feb-21 16:35:25

@tulips87 I've just wasted a FRER too 😭

They just got delivered and I couldn't resist the urge to test. I'm 10dpo, it's the afternoon and I went to the toilet an hour ago. I don't know what I was expecting.

Even if I am, it probably wouldn't come up right? Now I'm feeling disheartened, I don't know why I did it! When are you retesting? Xx

tulips87 Wed 17-Feb-21 17:37:37

@heybabes yes you do want to know everything, you go crazy googling and the answer you always get is "this is very common and most of the time there is no reason or nothing you can do about it", which really doesn't help and is annoying!
AF is due Wednesday for me, and you're right, I also see everyone posting BFP's on 8/9dpo and I'm like...how?!? Why can't that be us!!?

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tulips87 Wed 17-Feb-21 17:41:56

@missrose0110 sometimes you just have to get the POAS out of your system, which I guess is what we have all done here! We expect it to be a BFP every time.
Seriously though please don't feel disheartened, it's still very early to test and it was probably a very diluted sample too. Maybe wait a couple of days?
I don't think I will test again till after Wednesday if AF is late. I'm now planning my SMEP plan for next month because I've convinced myself I'm out this month.

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missrose0110 Wed 17-Feb-21 18:53:37

@tulips87 @tulips87 you're so right! I've got the poas urge out of my system now. I literally thought to myself as I was doing it "there's no way this will be positive" but I was hoping all the same. Yes, I'm going to wait a few more days and test, thinking maybe Saturday morning.

That's a good plan, waiting until AF is late, but I'm far too impatient for that haha xx

heybabes Thu 18-Feb-21 09:16:34

@tulips87 Exactly, so frustrating!

How you holding up today - 10 DPO! I resisted the urge to test this morning. Decided just to do it on an OPK for some weird reason - it helped. I'm going to try and wait as long as I can this time and like you trying to plan what I'm going to do next time!

I took Soy Isoflavones this month but at the latest you possibly can which can delay ovulation (I'm already on CD42 now...) so I'm going to take them again but earlier. I'm also going to try Pre-seed or Conceive Plus as I don't notice any EWCM so hopefully that might help!

tulips87 Thu 18-Feb-21 10:32:16

@missrose0110 have you resisted this morning? I've convinced myself I'm out so just waiting for AF to arrive next week. I haven't thought about it again after testing yesterday, and funnily my off feeling has disappeared 🤣
I'm so sure now that it was just all in my head!

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tulips87 Thu 18-Feb-21 10:36:19

@heybabes I'm feeling okay today how are you?ive not thought about testing again which is good for my mental health!
I'm glad it helped, I'm guessing there was no line on the OPK?
Has the soy made your cycle long? I'd be going crazy is my cycle was more than 30 days, how are you coping??
I used conceive plus this cycle, obviously didn't help! But I will continue to use it. I'm rubbish with the EWCM and trying to figure out what type it is, I wish I knew how though!

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