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I cannot imagine getting a BFP? > 6 month success stories plz!

(14 Posts)
CycleGirl20 Fri 04-Sep-20 10:36:28

I'm 6/7 months in, 34. For some reason I cannot imagine ever getting a BFP. I got some lines on 3 tests 2 cycles ago, which were either evap or chemical. In some ways I'd be happy if they were a chemical because it means at least we can conceive! At the time I was super happy and relieved but then the line was gone 2 days later.

Currently 10dpo and a negative on a frer so probably not going to happen this month. How do people keep a level head? The last week of each cycle is hard right! I'm constantly wondering if I could have some underlying issue and expecting we'll need IVF.

blush

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PlanBea Fri 04-Sep-20 10:44:20

I know it's hard to be told to take a deep breath and relax, but 6/7 months is still really early. 84% of couples conceive within the first year, 92% within the second. At 34 your GP won't refer until.youve been trying for a year because in most cases you'll achieve naturally by then.

I'm 33 and got my BFP 20 months after starting. It's hard! The easier months were the ones where I focused on enjoying it more and less on the "chore" if you know what I mean - the months we were doing SMEP or something particular were more draining.

CycleGirl20 Fri 04-Sep-20 11:11:29

Thanks @PlanBea. Congratulations! How far along are you?

I've read somewhere that being in your 30s means the average time to conception is more like 6-10 months. It's unfortunate that the days just before your period are usually when you're feeling the most emotional/hormonal and then that's also when you have to deal with BFN (or periods!). I explained that to my other half this morning whilst having a bit of a blub in bed hmm

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PlanBea Fri 04-Sep-20 11:40:16

Oh I had my fair share of tears! It's natural when you want something so badly and it's happening for everyone else who got pregnant "just from being looked at by their partner" but it's not happening for you yet. It feels so unfair! Do you do cycle tracking/temping? I generally knew my period was about to arrive so I kind of had a few days to process it before being confronted with definitely not being pregnant.

I'm currently 5 weeks so it's still early days for us. I'm terrified in case something goes wrong, but months of training that there's nothing you can do but your best has helped that feeling a bit!

CycleGirl20 Fri 04-Sep-20 12:42:05

I've been using ovulation sticks. I have a 2 day peak but I believe ovulation happens the day after the peak drops. I have quite a long follicular phase with ovulation on day 16 or 17 and then a 10 or 11 day luteal. I'm regular as clockwork cycle wise so don't think I have PCOS but have been wondering about low progesterone. I have actually convinced my doctor to check my day 2 and 21 blood so waiting for that.

That's lovely, 5 weeks, congrats! I'm glad you're managing to find ways to relax a little as best you can.

I never thought TTC would take so much time. You don't factor in it taking 6/12/18 months, plus 9 months pregnancy, plus double that of you want 2! I think I'd be doing something like looking for a new job or we'd move to another city if I didn't need the maternity leave! It has such a big impact on your life.

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Whilstwewait Fri 04-Sep-20 22:20:21

@CycleGirl20 Im 34 and just had my positive after 14 cycles. I never expected it to take this long and its been so stressful.

I never could imagine seeing the positive. I went for basic tests after 6 months (said it had been a year) they came back fine as did my husbands SA but still couldn't relax. I actually got my positive the month that I was ridiculously stressed in work. I had 4 sessions of acupuncture as well which may have helped or may have just been a coincidence and we were exploring private fertility treatment.

It will happen for you. Unfortunately for some it just does take longer which is so frustrating x

Chanel05 Sat 05-Sep-20 02:49:42

8 months first time, had a mmc then 8 months again. I'm now 38+4.

MaryShelley1818 Sat 05-Sep-20 08:23:46

I'm 42, currently 17wks pregnant with a little girl.
It took us 18mths, we'd completely given up! Had all the fertility tests and told we had unexplained secondary Infertility and there was nothing we could do.
The month I got pregnant we had sex once....before the fertile week (according to the app!)

CycleGirl20 Sat 05-Sep-20 08:25:53

@Whilstwewait and @Chanel05 congratulations! It is a pretty hard slog right! We had a "scare" the month before we started trying. We had planned to try from summer, but I forgot my pill and we both realised we'd be quite happy if I was pregnant, so we started the next month. I can't believe I even worried I might be pregnant at that point. I think it was like the second day pill from the packet hmm smile

Fingers crossed for me. My 21 day bloods came back "ovulating cycle". Need my day 2 and to speak to a doctor but sounds promising!

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CycleGirl20 Sat 05-Sep-20 08:37:17

@MaryShelley1818 congratulations! I do wonder if the time window is always accurate. Were you using any ovulation prediction tests?

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MaryShelley1818 Sat 05-Sep-20 08:43:33

CycleGirl20

*@MaryShelley1818* congratulations! I do wonder if the time window is always accurate. Were you using any ovulation prediction tests?

I had been previously (just cheapy ovulation sticks from Amazon - had always been accurate 2 years before when I had our little boy) but we had genuinely completely given up and moved on.

grandmasterstitch Sat 05-Sep-20 11:46:30

My DS took 18 months and it was so so hard. It's such a cliche but try to relax. I got so caught up with charting and temping and testing early on that after a year I was burnt out. The month I got pregnant I couldn't even tell you when I ovulated or anything, all the energy and enthusiasm had just been sapped at that point.

If it helps, I'm currently pregnant with number 2 and I conceived the first month trying. So just because it's a hard slog this time doesn't mean it'll be awful again if you decided to have another. I was dreading TTC because it was so awful last time

CycleGirl20 Sat 05-Sep-20 14:34:05

@grandmasterstitch congrats! Glad to hear your second was a lot easier. Do you think it was just luck or did you do anything else (I wondered if coming off the pill and intermittent fasting cost me a few months so far).

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grandmasterstitch Sat 05-Sep-20 14:59:36

@CycleGirl20 nothing different at all. I have a theory that I had an undiagnosed under active thyroid last time which is now under control and that can affect fertility but I'll never know if that was the reason. Last time the doctor said often it's like your body just knows what to do second time round

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