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Should we be worried?

(3 Posts)
KeepSmiling89 Mon 20-Jul-20 13:44:54

Hi all. Just looking for a bit of advice/support.
I'm 31, DH is 49. We've been TTC baby #1 since end of March (roughly). I came off the pill end of January (I think that's when it was). This is my 2nd cycle of using ovulation tests. Flo app says today is ovulation day but my test this morning was negative. Negative Tues-Thurs last week and negative yesterday. Didn't test Fri-Saturday.
My last 2 periods have also only been 1 day long whereas I'm used to them being about 2-3 days (very light flow on day 3).
I know it's still early days yet but DH mentioned today he thought it was worth getting things checked because of his age.
I'm concerned as he's been saying "it'll happen when it happens" but his concerns got me worried again too. I did what I shouldn't do and looked up male fertility o online and it wasn't very reassuring. Do we have a rough road ahead of us?
It took me a really long time to get ready to try as I was working on my career. Now I'm comfortable work wise I'm really worried I've waited too late and thinking it might not happen for us.

OP’s posts: |
Juno231 Mon 20-Jul-20 14:21:56

Hello! It's still very early days I'd say - the average time to conceive for your age is 6 months, and coming off the pill so recently might even prolong that a little bit. (I'm 32 on cycle 7 and came off the pill in Oct and have periods similar to yours)

The ovulation tests don't sound worrisome in the slightest - the apps merely guess at when you ovulate and most women find when they start testing that they actually ovulate way before/later than they thought. What CD are you now and how long are your cycles normally? Carry on testing with the OPKs and if you feel you're not getting anywhere with them then maybe try temping next cycle alongside it? Temping will also help you confirm whether you're ovulating or not.

What is your OH doing to improve his odds btw? He's the limiting factor in this equation so it's a bit unfair for him to put it on you to have things checked out I think. Has he stopped drinking/smoking/is he fit? Is he taking omega 3 and wellman to improve his chances? Does he always have a laptop on his lap cooking his goods etc smile

I say give it a few more months and then perhaps use letsgetchecked or something similar to do the day 3 and day 21 tests privately. I don't think the NHS will start looking into things unless you've got other symptoms or have been trying for closer to a year. Saying that - there's nothing stopping you from saying you've been trying for longer than you have!

Meme69 Mon 20-Jul-20 14:50:58

I agree with Juno, ovulation apps are not particularly accurate and go by an average woman. Lots of people I know have found they are ovulating much later than they thought once they start using opks.

Are you doing more than one opk a day? I do 2-3 as sometimes it changes completely in the space of a few hours.

KeepSmiling89 Mon 20-Jul-20 23:19:34

Thanks for the replies 🙂
DH is considering whether his age might be a factor so he's not putting thus all on me. He meant that we could both get ourselves checked out at some point. He's never smoked (hates it and it's put him off girls in the past) and only drinks occasionally (not regularly enough to even say weekly). We are both overweight...I'm constantly in the process of trying to lose weight and this is another BIG incentive to do so. We are both fairly healthy though.
He fathered a child before we met after a one night stand with a friend so I thought his fertility must be fine. But now, after googling male fertility, I'm beginning to wonder. As he got someone pregnant after one night, he was getting worried why we'd had no success after trying for a few months.
I did 2 OPK tests today. 1 at 11.30am and another at 2.30pm...both were negative.

I just felt really upset today and started worrying about the worst case scenario...which is what I always do. It took me ages to get to the point of being ready to try and it would just break both of our hearts if the decision was taken away from us due to infertility.
I work in a health centre right beside midwives so I always hear scans and baby heartbeats and appointments about pregnancy and it just hurts wishing so much for it to be my appointment.
NHS is our only option due to finances unfortunately. Going to give it a year before seeking help though. Fingers crossed for now 🤞

OP’s posts: |

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