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Will I ever be able to have a baby?

(13 Posts)
Abi0795 Wed 24-Jun-20 13:03:56

I'm so sorry if anyone finds themselves here if you've suffered a loss or if your struggling to convince.

I suffered my first miscarriage this month, this was also my first pregnancy. For as long as I can remember I've always had a fear of not being able to have children, and when I got pregnant my first month TTC I felt like my dreams have come true.

Now that has ended in heartbreak, I feel like all my fears have been justified. 😔

Is it normal to have these thoughts after a loss? xx

OP’s posts: |
whatwouldjohnmclanedo Wed 24-Jun-20 13:07:47

Your feelings are completely normal and it’s good that you are talking about them. You are highly likely to have a child in the future x

whatwouldjohnmclanedo Wed 24-Jun-20 13:09:24

I say that while watching my 3 year old and having felt just like you. I had a 4 year journey to get my baby. Have faith xxxx

0MrsT Wed 24-Jun-20 13:11:06

Of course it's normal.
You've been through a horrible experience and it's made you fear the future.. that's pretty standard!!
But unfortunately, miscarriage is so common and happens much more than people often think.. it doesn't usually mean there will be problems in the future but it's impossible to be rational while your grieving for that loss.
Be sad, angry, scared.. whatever you need to be it's all normal x

whatwouldjohnmclanedo Wed 24-Jun-20 13:11:25

I would suggest getting in touch with someone to talk to about this. I wish I had at the time. Or find a group of ladies who have been in a similar situation

GuiltyBark Wed 24-Jun-20 13:20:36

I'm sorry for your loss, it's normal to have all sorts of upsetting thoughts at this time. Miscarriages are so common - they're certainly not proof that you can't have a baby. You've been able to get pregnant - that's amazing and there's every chance you can get pregnant again. I had a miscarriage in my first pregnancy and then went on to have two more children with no problems. After a while hanging out with mums to be and mums you'll find that loads of people had miscarriages. Keep talking and take time to heal. Wishing you lots of luck x

ivfgottostaypositive Wed 24-Jun-20 13:28:56

I lost my first pregnancy at 12 weeks but I then did go on to have a DD but the fear never leaves you. I thought we'd broken our bad luck but trying to conceive baby nr 2 we've lost another 6 pregnancies

Don't give up and keep trying - you'll get there in the end xx

Abi0795 Wed 24-Jun-20 13:35:46

Thank you so much ladies. I have such an amazing OH who has been so positive and supportive. My friends and family have also been there for me, and I've been very open and honest about my experience because I really wish I'd known more about it before getting pregnant, as you say it's so so common.

I do suffer from anxiety so I do tend to always think on the negative side of things anyway. I'm just so sad this had to be my first experience of pregnancy.

Thank you so much for your kind words all of you ❤️

OP’s posts: |
Chicken123 Thu 25-Jun-20 11:11:31

@Abi0795
It’s almost as if I’d written this post.
I experienced my first pregnancy end of May which sadly ended in a MC.
I always knew it was common especially when so early, but never EVER thought it would happen to me.
What you’re feeling is normal because I felt and still do feel the same and although we’re not trying right now, I’m already so anxious that it could happen again to me in the future.
Keep your chin up and go with the flow of your emotions.
We only told our parents when we found out about the pregnancy, but now I’ve been finding it so helpful to talk about my experience as I feel I’m ready to share my experience x

Abi0795 Thu 25-Jun-20 12:07:53

@Chicken123 I'm so sorry your feeling these emotions too.
I was also the same, I kind of knew something wasn't right but I didn't ever really think it would end this way.
I keep googling and thinking what if I'm that rare person who can't carry a child successfully. I've even started looking at options if that was the case which I know seems very dramatic!
I wish you all the best and I'm sorry for your loss xxx

OP’s posts: |
Chanel05 Thu 25-Jun-20 20:06:27

So sorry for your loss, it is totally crap and the despair is awful after a mc. It took me 8 months to conceive and then I had a mmc. It took me another 8 months to conceive and I'm now 28+2 with my rainbow baby. Your happy ending is out there thanks.

Abi0795 Thu 25-Jun-20 21:11:19

@Chanel05 Thank you so much! I've spent so much time reading success stories after miscarriages to try and give myself some hope. It's just such an horrific thing to happen and I don't think I'll ever be the same again xxx

OP’s posts: |
whatwouldjohnmclanedo Sun 13-Sep-20 14:17:47

OP how are you doing?

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