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Sex after miscarriage - when is too early?

(9 Posts)
nizo1245 Fri 24-Apr-20 15:10:28

I miscarried on 13th April at 12 weeks, though the baby had stopped developing around a month before.
I wasn't given any advice on when to start trying again, but from everything I've read online 2 weeks/when you've stopped bleeding seems to be consistent.

I had completely stopped bleeding 8 days later - hadn't bled for 3 days. I took a pregnancy test which came back negative.

Quite hastily my partner and I had sex.
The first time was fine, but the second time it caused me to start bleeding afterwards and I've been spotting ever since.

Has anyone experienced anything similar?

OP’s posts: |
emvy Fri 24-Apr-20 19:09:10

I think probably you should be fine. Following two previous mcs (one mmc and one mc), I was told the same thing as you and we continued trying as soon as able both times. I only ever experienced bleeding after sex when I was pregnant. How heavy was the bleeding and has it completely stopped now? Have you had sex again?

SunnySideUp2020 Fri 24-Apr-20 19:18:43

I would be cautious.
We resumed trying around same as you a week after as bleeding had stopped but ended up having light bleeds and then came the horrible pain that took me back to hospital with a uterus infection... and two weeks of antibiotics.
Wait another week is my advice!!!

nizo1245 Fri 24-Apr-20 20:58:27

Thanks both for your replies. I'm still bleeding a little bit. We haven't had sex again since as I'm a bit worried it might lead to infection.

Sometimes when I go to the toilet it's completely fine and others there's a small amount of fresh blood. It's been 2 days now since the time we had sex that caused the bleeding.
I feel fine other than the blood so trying not to worry.
Obviously with lockdown etc I don't want to book a doctors appointment if I don't really need it.

Just a bit frustrating, 3 days of not bleeding and a negative test so we thought we were in the clear.

Thanks for your advice.
Planning to wait for the bleeding to completely stop again and take it from there.

OP’s posts: |
emvy Fri 24-Apr-20 22:21:32

If you’re still bleeding I’d second waiting another week. Annoying but better safe than sorry!

Best of luck to you going forward and I’m really sorry for your loss xx

nizo1245 Sat 25-Apr-20 05:24:39

Thanks @emvy, sorry for yours too.
Didn't expect to end up in this club on my first attempt but here we are.
Here's to waiting patiently for the next little while!

OP’s posts: |
emvy Sat 25-Apr-20 18:38:33

It certainly isn’t something you ever think will happen to you.. until it does 😔 was it a mmc confirmed at your 12 week scan?

Definitely. You’ve got this!

nizo1245 Sat 25-Apr-20 18:51:01

@emvy not quite. I'd actually passed the fetus a few hours before the 12 week scan. I'm almost glad it happened that way as I hadn't noticed any symptoms right up until I started bleeding a couple of days before.
As soon as I saw the blood I knew.

If I'd gone to the 12 week scan thinking everything was ok to be told the baby had stopped developing I'd be devastated. Especially since my partner couldn't come due to the lockdown.

Now that I think back I did have lower back pain on and off from about week 7. I put it down to something else at the time but now it makes a lot of sense.

My sister had a lot of miscarriages in her journey to 2 kids so I always knew it was a possibility. I think in a way that made it a bit easier.

Happy thoughts though, emotionally I'm doing way better than I thought, just focusing on the future and trying again.

Thanks so much for your support!!

OP’s posts: |
emvy Sat 25-Apr-20 21:35:24

Whatever the circumstances, it’s a difficult situation. I’m sorry. Happy thoughts indeed, best of luck to you for the future x

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