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Too scared to test

(22 Posts)
Maise24 Sat 11-Jan-20 08:59:56

Hi everyone,

This is my first post on mumsnet! So my partner and I have been TTC baby number 1 for 7 months now (I had my copper coil removed last may however we were long distance untill september). So far, we haven't had any success - I haven't been temping or charting etc as I found it far too stressful and anxiety provoking - plus the constant negative FRER's were becoming absolutely heart breaking!

My cycles are regular, usually 30-31 days, although very light periods since my coil removal. Today is CD 32 and no AF! I am too scared to test, I can't bear the thought of staring miserably at another negative FRER. I've felt sick yesterday morning and completely off the idea of having breakfast and the same this morning. A few days ago I had sharp twinges on my right side and a few on my left, with a sort of stabbing feeling through my back?? I don't want to grasp at straws and keep telling myself AF will arrive as I can't bear the disappointment. I haven't got any stomach or back cramps, however do have cramping in my legs, which I often get around AF time.

Is anyone else in the same boat, too scared to test?? I know 7 months is a short time in the TTC journey, I just find the crushing disappointment so hard and feel like there must be something wrong with me! I feel like I'm never going to see those 2 lines.

Would love to hear from anyone who is in or has been in this situation.

aNonnyMouse1511 Sat 11-Jan-20 21:12:31

Sorry darling but nobody can tell you if you’re pregnant or not except a HPT. You’re not alone though in your feelings. Good luck x

Maise24 Sun 12-Jan-20 18:42:08

Thank you for your response! I'm now 3 days late, 4 tomorrow. I think I'll do a FRER on tuesday or wednesday! I'm not sure what I'm really waiting for with testing, I think part of me is holding on to the idea I could be pregnant and dont want that to be shattered by another BFN. Fingers crossed though, unusual for af to be late.

Thanks for your good luck wishes! Xx

Sizeofalentil Sun 12-Jan-20 18:53:09

Do you have one to hand? I'd just test now to be honest. Just in case start bleeding (heaven forbid) then that way you can rule out chemical/ miscarriage

Maise24 Sun 12-Jan-20 18:57:30

I dont have one in the house no.... yes I should just be brave and go buy one tomorrow! It would be good to know I suppose either way. A friend of mine said she didnt get her BFP until her period was 6 days late which I think made me want to hang on

Maise24 Sun 12-Jan-20 18:58:14

Thanks for the advice smile its such a stressful time! X

Thefaceofboe Sun 12-Jan-20 19:15:47

Good luck flowers

Is it normal for your periods to be that late? If not it’s likely you are pregnant! I’m on the 14th month ttc, it’s so bloody draining x

summershine2204 Sun 12-Jan-20 19:23:16

I know it's hard to keep seeing just the one line but you're going to be going out of your mind waiting until the middle of the week. You're going to be symptom spotting and thinking about it constantly (I did), so just bite the bullet.

It's hard, but it's easier than making yourself wait.

Maise24 Sun 12-Jan-20 19:56:12

Hi lovelies!

No, my period has never been this late. My longest cycle in as long as I can remember was 33 days, usually 31 like clockwork. Tomorrow is day 34!!

Thank you for your advice! I'll get a FRER tomorrow morning and do with FMU.. fingers crossed.

Good luck with your journeys flowers it is draining, it feels like everyone around me is pregnant or announcing pregnancy... a woman at work who I was talking about TTC the other day said 'all I had to do was take my socks off!'.... amazing for people who it happens for that quickly but so painful when you are seeing BFN every month. Xx

Maise24 Sun 12-Jan-20 19:57:28

Wishing you lots of baby dust @thefaceofboe xx

peachypetite Sun 12-Jan-20 21:16:41

Good luck!!

darlingsweetpea Sun 12-Jan-20 21:58:04

Good luck

Maise24 Mon 13-Jan-20 12:37:25

Thanks everyone! I did a FRER and it was negative, although still no sign of AF. If I hold the test up at a certain angle I think I can see a very faint line but its probably just my eyes playing tricks on me hmm

Going to try again tomorrow with a clear blue and FMU. Honestly I dont feel like I'm ever going to see those 2 lines!!

summershine2204 Mon 13-Jan-20 13:56:24

Oh @Maise24 that's annoying! It's strange for you to randomly so late. I actually found my internet cheapies to be more sensitive than a FRER but I know it's Russian roulette with the cheapies as I've heard awful things about them too.

Fingers crossed for you though, you have no idea what's happening until AF is here

Maise24 Mon 13-Jan-20 14:12:40

Thank you @summershine2204 ... I thought a line was coming up at first but nothing. Under a certain light there is a faint faint line but could just be my eyes playing tricks on me. I'm going to try again tomorrow morning with FMU. I had been for a wee about 5 times this morning before I tested so that mignt have had an affect?? As we dont track, I've got no idea when (or if) I ovulated either.

I keep having waves of feeling sick, was almost sick when I bent down earlier and big waves of either back or stomach cramp which go away with a hot water bottle. The stabbing pains have stopped now too. Maybe its just a late period, would be very odd for me though. Fingers crossed.... my OH just said to keep testing, he is feeling positive about it which helps.

Are you TTC at the moment? Gosh I cant wait to see 2 lines, so longing for a little one xxx

Maise24 Mon 13-Jan-20 14:23:53

It sounds insane but I am starting to really hate FRER's! It feels like they give me nothing but bad news hmm ridiculous though I know!

EmbarrassingMama Mon 13-Jan-20 18:19:30

Try again with a FRER tomorrow, first wee of the day if you can. Good luck.

Maise24 Tue 14-Jan-20 06:14:03

Tested again with FMU and FRER this morning, negative sad I just dont understand! I cant stop myself feeling heart broken, there must be something wrong with me. My cycle has never been late. I wish my period would just come if it's going to come, I keep torturing myself thinking I'm going into early menopause or that my light periods meant something was wrong and now they've just stopped. OH patience is now wearing thin with me blubbing in bed at 6am!

This is so painful, my heart goes out to everyone who is having trouble TTC. I wish I had been prepared for how difficult this would be emotionally.

happysmiling Tue 14-Jan-20 18:54:41

I had something similar when I was trying. Longest cycle Iv even had 34 days then had a really heavy period so whether something had started to implant then came away I'll never know, but the next month there was a lovely cross so if this month isn't the month the maybe next one will be wink

Sizeofalentil Tue 14-Jan-20 20:12:22

I was 10 days late before I got a bfp with dd. So there's still hope.

Maise24 Wed 15-Jan-20 07:20:33

Thanks ladies flowers that gives me hope! Still no af... going to test again tomorrow. Booked a drs appt next Saturday for a blood test just incase AF hasn't arrived by then! Although last night had stomach cramps and swollen joints this morning so that is sometimes an indicator for me that af is on the way. CD 37!! I cant believe it, never been this late xx

Maise24 Wed 15-Jan-20 07:21:19

Lovely to hear about your BFP... Congratulations starflowers

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