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TTC after pregnancy loss - Thread 33- huddle up and bring on the BFP's

(917 Posts)
Mumlili8 Sun 17-Nov-19 00:01:26

Welcome to the 🐧 huddle. This a safe place to get and give support for everyone who has experienced the loss(es) of a pregnancy and baby. Pregnancy and child loss is the most awful thing anyone can experience and it can also be the most lonely time too. I hope you find this thread to be of some comfort.

Avocuddles Sun 17-Nov-19 17:31:49

@SunStruck I'm not eligible for miscarriage investigations having 'only' had two, however I've had most of the clotting tests due to my medical history and had been referred to the fertility clinic just before my first BFP due to age / irregular cycles. Thankfully even though I have conceived twice they have still been willing to keep performing the fertility tests, many of which overlap with MC tests. Assuming from the username that you live somewhere sunny? I'm on holiday in the Canary Islands at the moment and loving the sunshine, its good for the soul I feel....
I am also having plenty of wine and chorizo this week, I feel a bit of a blow out is well earned before we get back to the business of TTC....

@Mumlili8 great news on the timing! Hope this is your month.... I for one am so grateful for you and the entire penguin crew. This group has been so helpful for me over the six months I've been here so far (bar my brief trip to the graduates thread )

@MissSparkles81 sorry that you've found yourself here and hope you are doing as well as you can do after such a traumatic and sad experience. This thread is a fantastic place where you can ask any question or share any emotion without judgement and with guaranteed support from a group of strong warrior ladies who understand what so many others don't. I hope you're not on here for long but whilst you are we'll all be here to listen

tmc14 Sun 17-Nov-19 18:01:12

Hello all, I completely lost the previous thread... I also found it hard to keep up!
I’m 39
ttc #2, have a DS who is 2 this month.
Miscarriage at 10.5 weeks in October this year, after seeing a heartbeat at 8 weeks. Just finishing my first AF since. Was diagnosed with very low iron levels last week so now taking extra supplements & starting to feel like I have a little energy again.
Hoping to try from this month, although we struggle with dtd anywhere near enough, my last pregnancy felt like a miracle! Took 6/7 months to catch last time, so not too bad.

Sending love to everyone, I’ll try and keep up better as I really value everyone’s messages on here xx

MissSparkles81 Sun 17-Nov-19 18:22:33

Thank you for the welcome @Avocuddles xx

VenusStarr Sun 17-Nov-19 18:24:40

Hi all, just marking my place. I've been trying to take some time out before my operation (less than 3 weeks now!) thank you for the tag @Mumlili8

I'm 36
Ttc 2 years
Mmc April 2019
Mmc September 2019
Under fertility clinic and having a hysteroscopy and fibroid resection in December.
Had some rmc blood tests, just waiting for my results (think my age plus it taking so long to eventually concieve entitled us to more investigation)

👋 @SunStruck good to see you here

@Mumlili8 really hoping your biopsy results come back all clear and you get some positive news 🌈

I'll still be reading but might just lay low for a while, really struggling with my mental health at the moment. Our due date passing was not good and I've been a lot worse since. I'm starting counselling on Thursday.

Best wishes xx

Mumlili8 Sun 17-Nov-19 18:29:08

Hello @VenusStarr and @tmc14 nice to hear from you lovely ladies x

Rubbish23456 Sun 17-Nov-19 21:21:35

Hi ladies,

Can I join you, i had a mmc in September after ttc for 2 years. Now waiting for results as they suspect a partial molar pregnancy. We have 1 DD who has just turned 4 and dying to give her a brother or sister

turquoisebaby Sun 17-Nov-19 22:05:16

Evening Ladies,

Hopping aboad if i may.

I'm 26,
I have 1 DD who is nearly 3 and TTC#2
MMC our dear Alexandra at 16 weeks in August she took 12 months to conceive
Struggle with a short luteal phase of around 5-8 days. Although yesterday I have just ovulated on CD12 or a usual 30 days cycle and am in utter shock so my fingers, legs, arms and every possible body part is crossed for good luck.

SunStruck Mon 18-Nov-19 01:30:15

@MrsMGE thanks, you actually have a lot to do with my positive attitude 😄 after our chat about women at work, promotions etc I've put my energy into that bit and I feel satisfied and proud of that this is a bit I can control and an area where I am moving forward! Much unlike ttc 🤣🤣 And since then I've also traveled as you know, seen a new place, new culture, eaten some good food... TTC is not the be all and end all, it's a bonus but I've decided to not start freaking out just yet. I will still track and time dtd to feel like I've done all I can each month, and if it works it works, if not then I'll try again next month. Until it happens, I'm a proud mum of two fur babies! They give me so much joy and comfort! My due date is coming up (16 December), but I'm surprisingly calm. I'm positive it will happen for both of us in 2020 ❤️ How are you getting on with your promotion? 😄

@Avocuddles you guessed right, I live in the Middle East! I don't think I could go back to the UK anytime soon due to Brexit and everything that's going on over there politically (I am not British, but from an EU country). We have been here for more than 4 years now and are happy here (for now). Will eventually move back for sure, probably when kids (if we're that lucky!) are at school age. It's good you're getting some tests at least, I've heard a lot of ladies don't even get that after 2 miscarriages. Luckily we have good private healthcare here (through work), so I've had testing done (more bloods, hormones etc) and everything is normal although I have polycystic ovaries. I still ovulate every month (albeit late), got a good lining etc. I'm guessing my eggs is the problem as I'm 36, we seem to catch quickly so everything else SHOULD be fine, but it might be egg quality? In this case it's just a roulette to see when a good egg will be released! Not done any testing on my first mmc though (and 2nd was an early mc), but if I have another mmc I will probably look into it.

I think the difference between TTC at 36 and TTC at say 30-32 is that I feel like we don't have much time to waste. I already have less cycles per year than someone whom has regular 28 day cycles for instance, which means less chances per year. I'm trying my best to catch the ovulation day (and the days before) every month to give us the best chance. Are you using OPK or temping? I'm using Clearblue advanced digital as well as temping, and it works. CB is not very accurate after mc though as I'm guessing hormones are all over the place - I had 10 days of flashing smileys and no solid this cycle but ovulated anyway confirmed by temping.

I also take supplements - Mayo-inisotol to improve egg quality and ubiquinol. And obviously all the usual suspects like Pregnacare and omega 3.

Your holiday sounds amazing, I went away last week for a long weekend to Kuala Lumpur and also ate and drank everything in sight, it's needed!!! I'm usually living a pretty healthy lifestyle at home with gym and eating clean during the weeks, and sometimes you have to let go and do what's best for your soul 😄

SunStruck Mon 18-Nov-19 01:49:58

@VenusStarr hey, I've missed you! I'm so sorry your MH has been suffering, I saw in our other thread. Is it any better? My due date is also coming up. We need to stay strong and support each other! Good that your surgery is in 3 weeks, and come the New Year you'll be all good to go 😄

ChangeyMcChangeChange Mon 18-Nov-19 14:14:20

I wondered if I could ask some advice. I've had the results of my second blood test and it was 78 on Thursday and 15 today and so a 'failed pregnancy' as the hospital described. They have said I need to take a pregnancy test in three weeks and need to wait until my cycle returns to try again. Do I need to do that? I have read you don't really need to wait they just don't like it because should you get pregnant it's difficult for them to date it.

It's not that I immediately want to start trying again as such but I don't really want to be taking a pregnancy test in three weeks time.

MrsG3 Mon 18-Nov-19 14:33:48

Hi ladies, trying to catch up on the new thread. My phone doesn't send me notifications so I'm getting behind constantly playing catch up 😖

Just quickly @ReeRi I have ovulation spotting since I stopped taking the mini pill back in January, it's sometimes quite heavy. Mentioned it at my gp appointment this morning and she didn't seem too worried, just said that some women do. Obviously if you're concerned get it checked but just to say you're not alone!

Avocuddles Mon 18-Nov-19 15:08:26

@ChangeyMcChangeChange I would personally just take one in a week's time and if that is negative don't worry about doing another if you don't want to. After my second MC I tested negative after two weeks and didn't bother testing again. I didn't TTC for a couple of cycles but that was for the sake of my mental health more than anything....

ChangeyMcChangeChange Mon 18-Nov-19 15:18:58

Thank you @Avocuddles I can't think that if my levels are 15 today it's going to take three weeks for them to drop. I'm 40 in January so I don't really feel like i have the luxury of taking off too many cycles, but also if we feel up to it before my period comes back then it would be nice to do what we want. So much of the last year has been controlled by the 'right time'

Avocuddles Mon 18-Nov-19 17:05:48

@ChangeyMcChangeChange it's hard isn't it. We've been TTC #1 for over 18 months now and it's impossible to not feel drained. I hope that you get that BFN soon so that you can restart your journey towards a BFP....

ceebee21 Mon 18-Nov-19 17:22:53

Hi All,

TTC #1
MMC September 2019 - ERPC 1st October 2019

Currently 2DPO and hoping for a BFP... although can't say I am very Optimistic at the moment.

Hope you are all doing ok

x

tmc14 Mon 18-Nov-19 19:13:55

Thanks @Mumlili8
@ChangeyMcChangeChange I’m also 40 in January so feel your pain re timings! We did actually manage to dtd at the right time before my first period, but it arrived with no luck. I got my negative at 2.5 weeks after miscarrying, ovulated after 3 weeks. As @Avocuddles said, no need to wait three weeks if there’s a chance things are happening sooner. Good luck xxx

Seahawk80 Mon 18-Nov-19 19:29:11

Hi everyone. Sorry I dropped off the last thread. Just been so busy at work and then on my days off DS is such a handful. I ended up getting so behind that I knew catching up would take forever and kept never having time to catch up! So I'm afraid I haven't caught up but I will try to be better! Hi to everyone and welcome to everyone new, sorry you've found yourselves here. I had a TMFR in July and have one DS who is 2.5.

Not much to report here, I've been a bit down, feel like I'm constantly juggling work / childcare / life admin / money and don't have any time for me. I'm in the TWW now and have had really vivid dreams and am always cold which have both been early signs for me before but I'm scared as if I am pregnant I feel like it's not exciting and I'm just scared of another loss. Feeling very sorry for myself today! Sorry I haven't come back with something more uplifting!

Mumlili8 Mon 18-Nov-19 21:53:51

Hi ladies not sure where I am I might be just about to ovulate or have just ovulated fingers crossed 🤞.

How are you ladies today?

Is there anyone else that crochets or is into crafts if any sort. Just thought we could talk about other things too.

tmc14 Mon 18-Nov-19 22:14:25

Hi @Seahawk80 I’m the same, find it very hard to keep up! Have also been feeling sorry for myself this week. Fingers crossed that the signs are good for you. I imagine we’d all be very cautious if we got bfps, I know I would.

@mumlili8 I attempt to knit a bit, but am very slow! Was going to knit my toddler a hat for winter but might have to start one for next winter at this rate! My main hobby at the moment is gardening. I’m redoing ours after the builders destroys it and have been helping my friend in her allotment which I’ve been getting huge satisfaction from. Do you crochet? What sort of things do you make?

Mumlili8 Mon 18-Nov-19 22:25:37

@tmc14 yeah I like to have a go. I love making baby blankets mostly and little toys. I too love to garden and we grow our own vegetables in our back garden.

Winkat Tue 19-Nov-19 12:17:13

@ReeRi So sorry- you've been through a lot. 2020 will be your year - don't lose hope! xx

LASandOtto Tue 19-Nov-19 14:13:46

Hola chicas!

Wow ladies I've totally not kept up on the new thread!

@SunStruck ohhhhh oh of course I remember you! How are you doing? You were so brave throughout your MC, I remember thinking you're one strong lady going to the gym and all to keep yourself going! How are you now?

@MrsMGE how are you doing?? Been thinking of you!

@Avocuddles @ReeRi @Mumlili8 and everyone else it's nice to be back on here!

Had a few days off as was in Munich for business; now at the airport just waiting for my flight.

To all the ladies I hadn't met before or who are new, welcome to the thread!!

Only a few weeks left for Xmas!!!!

I've got my appointment on Friday at the private clinic for some tests and an initial chat, now getting nervous about it. Aside from the obvious blood tests for thyroid, antibodies, etc does anyone else have any other recommendations what else to have tested? My DH is there as well and getting a sperm test and we both have to do all the STD tests etc too.

Just a quick post ladies sorry, now running to the plane. Will read property later. X

LASandOtto Tue 19-Nov-19 14:15:24

Oh and forgot my stats:

33 (34 in Feb)
TTC for a year
MC in Feb 2019 at 8 weeks
MC in Oct 2019 at 11 weeks
DH is 41 :-)
No children yet sadly but...

Hoping for our 2020 babies and a lot of positivity and love for you all! Xx

Anny27 Tue 19-Nov-19 19:26:12

Hi ladies, dropped off the old thread whilst i was going through the miscarriage but ready to chat ttc again smile

Age:27
Ttc #1 since june 2019
MMC November 2019 (11 +5)

I had medical management for the MMC which worked but ended up losing too much blood so had to have emergency erpc and now taking antibiotics for infection and iron tablets. So i am waitinf untill my next period before ttc as i want to be well in myselfsmile

tmc14 Tue 19-Nov-19 20:13:30

@Mumlili8 ah I love little crocheted/knitted figures. I’m nowhere near good enough for those yet! I’m doing a hat at the moment but I’m very very slow. My garden is sadly too small for veggies, it’s a decent size for some flowers & somewhere to sit, and I managed a few tomato plants this year. I’m on the waiting list for an allotment plot so fingers crossed next season I can grow loads more!

@LASandOtto good luck for the appointment on Friday, I’ve no experience of fertility tests so can’t advise.

@anny27 hope you’re feeling better soon, my iron tablets kicked in after only a few days thankfully, I’m amazed by the extra energy!

Today I found out a second person is due the same week I should have been, and the midwife called asking why I didn’t attend my 16 week appointment. So not a great day here. But dinner is on, DH is nearly home from work and I’m playing with the cats, so concentrating on the positives. Trying to drink less so resisting the temptation of a glass of wine!

Hope everyone is having a nice evening xx

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