Talk

Advanced search

TTC after pregnancy loss - Thread 33- huddle up and bring on the BFP's

(912 Posts)
Mumlili8 Sun 17-Nov-19 00:01:26

Welcome to the 🐧 huddle. This a safe place to get and give support for everyone who has experienced the loss(es) of a pregnancy and baby. Pregnancy and child loss is the most awful thing anyone can experience and it can also be the most lonely time too. I hope you find this thread to be of some comfort.

Mumlili8 Sun 17-Nov-19 00:15:47

🐧 🐧 🐧 🐧 🐧 🐧 🐧 🐧 🐧 🐧 🐧 🐧 🐧

Welcome to the 🐧 huddle. This is a wonderful supportive group for anyone TTC after the loss of a pregnancy or baby. Together we can get through he rollercoaster of TTC and get our baby penguins xx

Roll call, I will start

Mumlili4
Age 38
8 miscarriages to date mc, mmc, cp, cp, mmc, mmc, cp and cp. Not hopeful this cycle. Waiting to ovulate but usually do cd10 or cd11 I'm now cd12 with not a shadow on opks and cbfm says low still. So possibly an anovulation cycle.

Baby dust to everyone xx

@VenusStarr
@strawberrye
@Avocuddles
@Marmite83
@TwinkleStars15
@MrsMGE
@Russkispy
@JuniperAndRose
@Mistymeow

Started to tag if someone else can continue x

Mumlili8 Sun 17-Nov-19 00:21:22

@ReeRi hi hun this the new thread. As to your question about spotting, I have had this before hun. As long as it doesn't last too long, get worse or is painful I'd say your ok. Some time you can get spotting when you ovulate, when the egg breaks through the folic wall. If your worried though check on with the doc. Otherwise it could also be abit of old blood dislodged by dtd. Hope your OK and good luck and fingers crossed 🤞 for that bfp this cycle x

Mumlili8 Sun 17-Nov-19 00:28:07

Correction to my roll call post I'm currently cd9 not 12.

Im currently going though Rmc clinics, I'm waiting on results from a cervical biopsy and have an appointment with gynaecology for suspected Asherman's syndrome.
Most recent blood work suggested that I'm approaching menopause, so I'm feeling rather nervous about how long I've got left and how long all the investigations are taking. Hoping I will get my rainbow 🌈 baby xxx

Mumlili8 Sun 17-Nov-19 00:36:29

@Sunflower1608
@Mystie
@Murree @ChangeyMcChangeChange
@LASandOtto

If I've forgotten anyone please tag them x

Sunflower1608 Sun 17-Nov-19 01:04:23

Sunflower1608
Age 31
Blessed with 3 children.
In a new relationship been trying to conceive for 7months, 1 MC in September at 6weeks.
Currently on CD7

MrsMGE Sun 17-Nov-19 07:06:32

Hello everyone!

Age: 33
MMC June 2019
TTC since March 2019
Currently TTCing for my rainbow baby 🌈 - firsr one to take home.

TwinkleStars15 Sun 17-Nov-19 07:42:44

Thanks @Mumlili8 flowers

Age 31
TTC #2
One missed miscarriage at 11 weeks and one natural miscarriage at 5-6 weeks.
Cycle #6 CD20 AF/BFP due 27th
Have Factor V Leiden blood clotting disorder so have to be on Clexane throughout pregnant and for a year or more after.

I struggle to keep up with thread as it’s so fast paced, but I do read the updates daily. Good lock to you all for your rainbow babies flowers

JimSlim Sun 17-Nov-19 09:28:52

Hello. Wanted to join if that’s ok -

I’m early 30s. Have one healthy child, and since having her I have suffered a mmc at 20 weeks, cp, then mmc at 12 weeks.

I have an appointment with miscarriage clinic this week and am just desperate to be pregnant again but also terrified of the idea. Not officially ‘trying’ until next cycle, but I was convinced that I may have been pregnant this week. Got a negative on a Sainsbury’s early test yesterday though so looks like it’s not my month. sad

Murree Sun 17-Nov-19 10:26:49

Hello on the new thread!
I'm 34
TTC #1 for 2 and a half years
Just miscarried at 5 weeks, was the first time pregnant x

ChangeyMcChangeChange Sun 17-Nov-19 10:59:05

Hello on new thread

39, a year TTC this time
Two years to conceive my first daughter who has just turned two
Treatment for endometriosis in August
MC/cp at five weeks earlier this week

strawberrye Sun 17-Nov-19 11:18:05

Hi @Mumlili8 thanks for the tag, I'm often popping in to read how you all are, sorry to see so many new faces. How are you doing? I'm thinking of you a lot and sending you all my baby wishes.

For those that don't know me I'm currently over on the grads thread as I'm 24 weeks pregnant. I was on this thread for around 18 months TTC #1 and had 3 early losses before 6 weeks. Diagnosed hypothyroidism and seen at Tommy's in Coventry after a horrible appointment at my local recurrent miscarriage clinic, saw the lovely Professor Quenby and was given progesterone pessaries to use from 7dpo and continue if BFP at 14dpo. I fell pregnant on that and used the pessaries until about 14-15 weeks in this pregnancy. Apologies if this post upsets anyone but I felt so despondent that there were very few people like me with recurrent chemicals that I would have appreciated hearing about someone's story which was similar to mine.

Try to keep strong ladies, and on the days when you feel like you can't keep strong, remember you are a superhero just for keeping going from one day to the next. Sending you all loss of hugs and rainbow baby wishes 🌈

SunStruck Sun 17-Nov-19 13:55:21

Hi ladies,

I must admit I've been stalking your previous thread for a while, but didn't join just yet only because the thread was so long and it felt a bit daunting! 😄 I've been active on another thread with some lovely ladies, two of them actually here: @MrsMGE and *@LASandOtto*, you know me. Most of the ladies on that thread have already graduated quite a while ago though, and I'm a bit behind!

This is me:

36 years old
First child, TTC since February
MMC at 10 weeks in May
MC at 4-5 weeks in October
Currently 7 or 8 DPO

I've been lucky to catch on the second cycle each time, but it did take ages between the mmc and the cycles to go back to normal. I needed a 2nd d&c due to retained products. This second time which was natural, I've gone back pretty quickly (for me. My cycles are long), so let's see.

I also have polycystic ovaries (not the syndrome), I don't know if this might make my cycles longer.

@MrsMGE and @LASandOtto missed you guys! 🥰🤗

Avocuddles Sun 17-Nov-19 14:45:51

Thanks @Mumlili8 for setting up the new thread!

About me....
@Avocuddles (naff username inspired by a pair of pyjamas that has stuck for a while now!)
Age 36
TTC #1 since June 2018
2 MCs in May and September this year, both at 7-8 weeks but pregnancies had stopped developing at c5-6 weeks. Saw a heartbeat second time round but was measuring behind so knew then that it was unlikely to work out.
Under the Leeds fertility clinic due to long and irregular cycles, though haven't had any medical help yet, just numerous tests.
When pregnant I take Enoxaprin injections and aspirin due to history of deep vein thrombosis which makes my pregnancies high risk.
Have had a couple of months off TTC for the sake of my mental health and relationship, and feeling in a far better place now than I did after the first MC. Ready to start actively trying again and not sure which I'm more scared of, not conceiving or falling pregnant..... confused

MrsMGE Sun 17-Nov-19 15:07:45

Heeey @SunStruck, sista ❤️ Good to see you here. Glad you've had a good holiday, fingers crossed for this month.

I've taken a month off much like @Avocuddles for the sake of my mental health, and it was the right thing to do. Currently getting into the Christmas spirit and stocking up on Baileys and mince pies. This is a lovely group, similar to the one we've been on before, lots of awesome, strong, interesting and like-minded ladies. Our other thread went quiet because everyone is now far along in their pregnancies, I half expected that it might naturally fizzle out as a result. But, great company here, welcome back ❤️ xxx

Avocuddles Sun 17-Nov-19 15:15:44

@SunStruck welcome! Seems like our circumstance are quite similar. How long are your cycles normally? When I first came off the mini pill mine were ridiculously long, 60+ days, though think they've averaged out more like 35 days over the past few months. It's so frustrating!

MrsMGE Sun 17-Nov-19 15:31:08

Also... re the name of the thread, does anyone know the background story? I'm really curious. We're all like penguin-mums, huddled together for comfort and support, and hopefully soon with our baby penguins on the way. Is this the idea behind? Who was the original author? It's a lovely name🐧🐧🐧 xxx

SunStruck Sun 17-Nov-19 15:48:46

@Avocuddles oh yeah very similar! And age too 😄 my app (Naturalcycles) say 39 +- 6 days which is a huge variation. It's not completely accurate as the cycles have been messed up after my first mmc, so I think it is around 35-37 days normally probably. I ovulate very late in my cycle and have a short luteal phase, maybe 8-9 days. I'm sorry to hear about your miscarriages 😔 so are you under investigation now because you're over 35? Or won't they do it until you've had 3 miscarriages (I've heard that's the case wiTH NHS - I live abroad so I'm not sure).

@MrsMGE yes I thought you looked like a great group, just like our other one! But since everyone's so far along in their pregnancies I also don't want to keep talking about temping and ovulation, I'm sure it gets boring 😆oh you're Christmas planning sound amazing. I'm being healthy during the weeks, gym 5 days during the week and eating clean, but I'm not giving up my wine or treats on the weekends 😄 not going to restrict myself now until I get the BFP! I really think it just stresses you out. I'm trying not to think too much about it (obviously still trying to dtd around ovulation, but I'm not thinking about a BFP day and night). It's nice to have other things to look forward to! This trip was good for my mind and soul!

Mumlili8 Sun 17-Nov-19 16:12:15

Hi ladies. Great to see some of you made it over here.
I had a little surprise this afternoon. I use the clearblue fertility monitor in the morning and easy@home opks and clearblue digital ovulation tests in the afternoon. This morning I got a high fertility, (I don't normally mention this to DH as it builds to much pressure and we then run into performance issues. I only ever tell him when it's a peak and hope for the best) luckily DH woke up this morning in a very good mood wink wink and to my surprise I got a peak opk x 2 about 30mins ago. This is unusual for me as I usually get 2 or 3 days high before peak. DH is also away for the next 2 days so this mornings dtd couldn't have been more luckily timed lol. I just hope I actually ovulate with in 36 hours this cycle as it took 4 days from peak to ovulation last cycle, by which time we had stopped dtding because I thought it was an anovulation cycle. So fingers crossed lol

@strawberrye lovely to hear from you and congrats on the healthy pregnancy hun x please keep us updated.

Welcome to the new ladies and sorry you find your self part of a club no one ever wants to join. I do hope that this thread is of some comfort at such a horrible and lonely time.

Baby dust to you all xx

Mumlili8 Sun 17-Nov-19 16:13:52

Oh my last blood results showed that my estrogen and tsh were up a bit. Do any of you ladies know how to bring these down naturally?

Mumlili8 Sun 17-Nov-19 16:18:55

@MrsMGE hi hun. Yes that is exactly the idea behind the 🐧 huddle. I don't know who originally started the first thread but I've been here since thread 14 and it's always been the penguin 🐧 huddle. I love the idea and often refer to this as my penguin family lol I think I'm the longest standing member of the penguins and I guess that makes me the mother penguin and feel it's my duty to keep it going lol (that's really sad isn't it)

MrsMGE Sun 17-Nov-19 16:27:52

@Mumlili8 No, it isn't sad. There will always be that one mother-penguin, it so happens it's you at the moment, but it won't be this way forever ❤️ Very grateful you've started the new thread to keep the huddle together - together stronger! Good luck this month Xxx

@SunStruck I'm glad you're feeling better. You're so on it, I'm very impresse, especially considering your second MC is still so recent. I've kind of let go now, allowed myself to feel sad or rubbish at times, and just doing my best. That's enough. Since I've let go, things have become so much better as well, I haven't got a military routine of exercising etc., but I try to do something every day too. Also prepping healthy meals for the week, meditating etc. I found not planning things also helps, I go with the flow now and remind myself to do what's good for me every day, this attitude helps me with actually doing something. Xxx

ReeRi Sun 17-Nov-19 16:30:14

Hi @Mumlili8 Thank you for the new thread and for responding to my concern about spotting. Hopefully it is nothing to worry about.

Fingers crossed for you this cycle with your peak and timely BD!

Me:
Age 35
DD1 was born sleeping at 40 weeks in February 2019
TTC#2 since April 2019
MC at 4.5 weeks in August 2019

DD will always be our #1 so while TTC#2 the next baby would (hopefully) be the first child we bring home 🌈

Pleased you are doing well @strawberrye

MissSparkles81 Sun 17-Nov-19 17:14:48

Hi Ladies .. Ive just came across this thread. Ive been hanging around the miscarriage thread the past week but looking for some support in trying to move forward I guess.

Im 38 and have been with my partner for 4 years. He has a 5year old from a previous relationship and up until this time last week I was 9 weeks pregnant with our 1st baby.

I found out after a scan that our baby stopped growing at 8.5 weeks and I didnt want to have surgical or medical management. I ended up in A+E anyway which was horrific.

Anyway I guess I am hoping to hang around and get some tips on TTC after a loss from people who so sadly understand.

MissSparkles81 Sun 17-Nov-19 17:15:51

Meant to say we have been trying since March 2019 with one possible chemical or a dodgy test (who knows) hmm

Avocuddles Sun 17-Nov-19 17:31:49

@SunStruck I'm not eligible for miscarriage investigations having 'only' had two, however I've had most of the clotting tests due to my medical history and had been referred to the fertility clinic just before my first BFP due to age / irregular cycles. Thankfully even though I have conceived twice they have still been willing to keep performing the fertility tests, many of which overlap with MC tests. Assuming from the username that you live somewhere sunny? I'm on holiday in the Canary Islands at the moment and loving the sunshine, its good for the soul I feel....
I am also having plenty of wine and chorizo this week, I feel a bit of a blow out is well earned before we get back to the business of TTC....

@Mumlili8 great news on the timing! Hope this is your month.... I for one am so grateful for you and the entire penguin crew. This group has been so helpful for me over the six months I've been here so far (bar my brief trip to the graduates thread )

@MissSparkles81 sorry that you've found yourself here and hope you are doing as well as you can do after such a traumatic and sad experience. This thread is a fantastic place where you can ask any question or share any emotion without judgement and with guaranteed support from a group of strong warrior ladies who understand what so many others don't. I hope you're not on here for long but whilst you are we'll all be here to listen

tmc14 Sun 17-Nov-19 18:01:12

Hello all, I completely lost the previous thread... I also found it hard to keep up!
I’m 39
ttc #2, have a DS who is 2 this month.
Miscarriage at 10.5 weeks in October this year, after seeing a heartbeat at 8 weeks. Just finishing my first AF since. Was diagnosed with very low iron levels last week so now taking extra supplements & starting to feel like I have a little energy again.
Hoping to try from this month, although we struggle with dtd anywhere near enough, my last pregnancy felt like a miracle! Took 6/7 months to catch last time, so not too bad.

Sending love to everyone, I’ll try and keep up better as I really value everyone’s messages on here xx

MissSparkles81 Sun 17-Nov-19 18:22:33

Thank you for the welcome @Avocuddles xx

VenusStarr Sun 17-Nov-19 18:24:40

Hi all, just marking my place. I've been trying to take some time out before my operation (less than 3 weeks now!) thank you for the tag @Mumlili8

I'm 36
Ttc 2 years
Mmc April 2019
Mmc September 2019
Under fertility clinic and having a hysteroscopy and fibroid resection in December.
Had some rmc blood tests, just waiting for my results (think my age plus it taking so long to eventually concieve entitled us to more investigation)

👋 @SunStruck good to see you here

@Mumlili8 really hoping your biopsy results come back all clear and you get some positive news 🌈

I'll still be reading but might just lay low for a while, really struggling with my mental health at the moment. Our due date passing was not good and I've been a lot worse since. I'm starting counselling on Thursday.

Best wishes xx

Mumlili8 Sun 17-Nov-19 18:29:08

Hello @VenusStarr and @tmc14 nice to hear from you lovely ladies x

Rubbish23456 Sun 17-Nov-19 21:21:35

Hi ladies,

Can I join you, i had a mmc in September after ttc for 2 years. Now waiting for results as they suspect a partial molar pregnancy. We have 1 DD who has just turned 4 and dying to give her a brother or sister

turquoisebaby Sun 17-Nov-19 22:05:16

Evening Ladies,

Hopping aboad if i may.

I'm 26,
I have 1 DD who is nearly 3 and TTC#2
MMC our dear Alexandra at 16 weeks in August she took 12 months to conceive
Struggle with a short luteal phase of around 5-8 days. Although yesterday I have just ovulated on CD12 or a usual 30 days cycle and am in utter shock so my fingers, legs, arms and every possible body part is crossed for good luck.

SunStruck Mon 18-Nov-19 01:30:15

@MrsMGE thanks, you actually have a lot to do with my positive attitude 😄 after our chat about women at work, promotions etc I've put my energy into that bit and I feel satisfied and proud of that this is a bit I can control and an area where I am moving forward! Much unlike ttc 🤣🤣 And since then I've also traveled as you know, seen a new place, new culture, eaten some good food... TTC is not the be all and end all, it's a bonus but I've decided to not start freaking out just yet. I will still track and time dtd to feel like I've done all I can each month, and if it works it works, if not then I'll try again next month. Until it happens, I'm a proud mum of two fur babies! They give me so much joy and comfort! My due date is coming up (16 December), but I'm surprisingly calm. I'm positive it will happen for both of us in 2020 ❤️ How are you getting on with your promotion? 😄

@Avocuddles you guessed right, I live in the Middle East! I don't think I could go back to the UK anytime soon due to Brexit and everything that's going on over there politically (I am not British, but from an EU country). We have been here for more than 4 years now and are happy here (for now). Will eventually move back for sure, probably when kids (if we're that lucky!) are at school age. It's good you're getting some tests at least, I've heard a lot of ladies don't even get that after 2 miscarriages. Luckily we have good private healthcare here (through work), so I've had testing done (more bloods, hormones etc) and everything is normal although I have polycystic ovaries. I still ovulate every month (albeit late), got a good lining etc. I'm guessing my eggs is the problem as I'm 36, we seem to catch quickly so everything else SHOULD be fine, but it might be egg quality? In this case it's just a roulette to see when a good egg will be released! Not done any testing on my first mmc though (and 2nd was an early mc), but if I have another mmc I will probably look into it.

I think the difference between TTC at 36 and TTC at say 30-32 is that I feel like we don't have much time to waste. I already have less cycles per year than someone whom has regular 28 day cycles for instance, which means less chances per year. I'm trying my best to catch the ovulation day (and the days before) every month to give us the best chance. Are you using OPK or temping? I'm using Clearblue advanced digital as well as temping, and it works. CB is not very accurate after mc though as I'm guessing hormones are all over the place - I had 10 days of flashing smileys and no solid this cycle but ovulated anyway confirmed by temping.

I also take supplements - Mayo-inisotol to improve egg quality and ubiquinol. And obviously all the usual suspects like Pregnacare and omega 3.

Your holiday sounds amazing, I went away last week for a long weekend to Kuala Lumpur and also ate and drank everything in sight, it's needed!!! I'm usually living a pretty healthy lifestyle at home with gym and eating clean during the weeks, and sometimes you have to let go and do what's best for your soul 😄

SunStruck Mon 18-Nov-19 01:49:58

@VenusStarr hey, I've missed you! I'm so sorry your MH has been suffering, I saw in our other thread. Is it any better? My due date is also coming up. We need to stay strong and support each other! Good that your surgery is in 3 weeks, and come the New Year you'll be all good to go 😄

ChangeyMcChangeChange Mon 18-Nov-19 14:14:20

I wondered if I could ask some advice. I've had the results of my second blood test and it was 78 on Thursday and 15 today and so a 'failed pregnancy' as the hospital described. They have said I need to take a pregnancy test in three weeks and need to wait until my cycle returns to try again. Do I need to do that? I have read you don't really need to wait they just don't like it because should you get pregnant it's difficult for them to date it.

It's not that I immediately want to start trying again as such but I don't really want to be taking a pregnancy test in three weeks time.

MrsG3 Mon 18-Nov-19 14:33:48

Hi ladies, trying to catch up on the new thread. My phone doesn't send me notifications so I'm getting behind constantly playing catch up 😖

Just quickly @ReeRi I have ovulation spotting since I stopped taking the mini pill back in January, it's sometimes quite heavy. Mentioned it at my gp appointment this morning and she didn't seem too worried, just said that some women do. Obviously if you're concerned get it checked but just to say you're not alone!

Avocuddles Mon 18-Nov-19 15:08:26

@ChangeyMcChangeChange I would personally just take one in a week's time and if that is negative don't worry about doing another if you don't want to. After my second MC I tested negative after two weeks and didn't bother testing again. I didn't TTC for a couple of cycles but that was for the sake of my mental health more than anything....

ChangeyMcChangeChange Mon 18-Nov-19 15:18:58

Thank you @Avocuddles I can't think that if my levels are 15 today it's going to take three weeks for them to drop. I'm 40 in January so I don't really feel like i have the luxury of taking off too many cycles, but also if we feel up to it before my period comes back then it would be nice to do what we want. So much of the last year has been controlled by the 'right time'

Avocuddles Mon 18-Nov-19 17:05:48

@ChangeyMcChangeChange it's hard isn't it. We've been TTC #1 for over 18 months now and it's impossible to not feel drained. I hope that you get that BFN soon so that you can restart your journey towards a BFP....

ceebee21 Mon 18-Nov-19 17:22:53

Hi All,

TTC #1
MMC September 2019 - ERPC 1st October 2019

Currently 2DPO and hoping for a BFP... although can't say I am very Optimistic at the moment.

Hope you are all doing ok

x

tmc14 Mon 18-Nov-19 19:13:55

Thanks @Mumlili8
@ChangeyMcChangeChange I’m also 40 in January so feel your pain re timings! We did actually manage to dtd at the right time before my first period, but it arrived with no luck. I got my negative at 2.5 weeks after miscarrying, ovulated after 3 weeks. As @Avocuddles said, no need to wait three weeks if there’s a chance things are happening sooner. Good luck xxx

Seahawk80 Mon 18-Nov-19 19:29:11

Hi everyone. Sorry I dropped off the last thread. Just been so busy at work and then on my days off DS is such a handful. I ended up getting so behind that I knew catching up would take forever and kept never having time to catch up! So I'm afraid I haven't caught up but I will try to be better! Hi to everyone and welcome to everyone new, sorry you've found yourselves here. I had a TMFR in July and have one DS who is 2.5.

Not much to report here, I've been a bit down, feel like I'm constantly juggling work / childcare / life admin / money and don't have any time for me. I'm in the TWW now and have had really vivid dreams and am always cold which have both been early signs for me before but I'm scared as if I am pregnant I feel like it's not exciting and I'm just scared of another loss. Feeling very sorry for myself today! Sorry I haven't come back with something more uplifting!

Mumlili8 Mon 18-Nov-19 21:53:51

Hi ladies not sure where I am I might be just about to ovulate or have just ovulated fingers crossed 🤞.

How are you ladies today?

Is there anyone else that crochets or is into crafts if any sort. Just thought we could talk about other things too.

tmc14 Mon 18-Nov-19 22:14:25

Hi @Seahawk80 I’m the same, find it very hard to keep up! Have also been feeling sorry for myself this week. Fingers crossed that the signs are good for you. I imagine we’d all be very cautious if we got bfps, I know I would.

@mumlili8 I attempt to knit a bit, but am very slow! Was going to knit my toddler a hat for winter but might have to start one for next winter at this rate! My main hobby at the moment is gardening. I’m redoing ours after the builders destroys it and have been helping my friend in her allotment which I’ve been getting huge satisfaction from. Do you crochet? What sort of things do you make?

Mumlili8 Mon 18-Nov-19 22:25:37

@tmc14 yeah I like to have a go. I love making baby blankets mostly and little toys. I too love to garden and we grow our own vegetables in our back garden.

Winkat Tue 19-Nov-19 12:17:13

@ReeRi So sorry- you've been through a lot. 2020 will be your year - don't lose hope! xx

LASandOtto Tue 19-Nov-19 14:13:46

Hola chicas!

Wow ladies I've totally not kept up on the new thread!

@SunStruck ohhhhh oh of course I remember you! How are you doing? You were so brave throughout your MC, I remember thinking you're one strong lady going to the gym and all to keep yourself going! How are you now?

@MrsMGE how are you doing?? Been thinking of you!

@Avocuddles @ReeRi @Mumlili8 and everyone else it's nice to be back on here!

Had a few days off as was in Munich for business; now at the airport just waiting for my flight.

To all the ladies I hadn't met before or who are new, welcome to the thread!!

Only a few weeks left for Xmas!!!!

I've got my appointment on Friday at the private clinic for some tests and an initial chat, now getting nervous about it. Aside from the obvious blood tests for thyroid, antibodies, etc does anyone else have any other recommendations what else to have tested? My DH is there as well and getting a sperm test and we both have to do all the STD tests etc too.

Just a quick post ladies sorry, now running to the plane. Will read property later. X

LASandOtto Tue 19-Nov-19 14:15:24

Oh and forgot my stats:

33 (34 in Feb)
TTC for a year
MC in Feb 2019 at 8 weeks
MC in Oct 2019 at 11 weeks
DH is 41 :-)
No children yet sadly but...

Hoping for our 2020 babies and a lot of positivity and love for you all! Xx

Anny27 Tue 19-Nov-19 19:26:12

Hi ladies, dropped off the old thread whilst i was going through the miscarriage but ready to chat ttc again smile

Age:27
Ttc #1 since june 2019
MMC November 2019 (11 +5)

I had medical management for the MMC which worked but ended up losing too much blood so had to have emergency erpc and now taking antibiotics for infection and iron tablets. So i am waitinf untill my next period before ttc as i want to be well in myselfsmile

tmc14 Tue 19-Nov-19 20:13:30

@Mumlili8 ah I love little crocheted/knitted figures. I’m nowhere near good enough for those yet! I’m doing a hat at the moment but I’m very very slow. My garden is sadly too small for veggies, it’s a decent size for some flowers & somewhere to sit, and I managed a few tomato plants this year. I’m on the waiting list for an allotment plot so fingers crossed next season I can grow loads more!

@LASandOtto good luck for the appointment on Friday, I’ve no experience of fertility tests so can’t advise.

@anny27 hope you’re feeling better soon, my iron tablets kicked in after only a few days thankfully, I’m amazed by the extra energy!

Today I found out a second person is due the same week I should have been, and the midwife called asking why I didn’t attend my 16 week appointment. So not a great day here. But dinner is on, DH is nearly home from work and I’m playing with the cats, so concentrating on the positives. Trying to drink less so resisting the temptation of a glass of wine!

Hope everyone is having a nice evening xx

Anny27 Tue 19-Nov-19 20:19:41

@tmc14 yes hopefully i get some more energy soon! And i want mt appetite to come back 🤞 oh that reminds me i should cancel by 16 week appointment.....you would thinj the EPU and the midwives would be linked somehow as i didnt enjoy cancelling my 12 week scan either :S

tmc14 Tue 19-Nov-19 20:35:46

@anny27 see, I was so proud of myself for remembering to ask in EPU if I needed to cancel things & they said they sorted it all. And this is the second time they’ve contacted me, & the second time I’ve had to explain. I’m expecting a call at 42 weeks to ask why I haven’t given birth yet...

Anny27 Tue 19-Nov-19 20:40:41

@tmc14 that made me laugh the expecting a phone call at 42 weeks asking why you havent given birth 😂 i needed a laugh today haha!

tmc14 Tue 19-Nov-19 21:21:48

@anny27 happy to help with a laugh. I’ve got a bit of a dark sense of humour. I kind of found it funny in EPU, I was strongly telling the nurses I was fine to go home and felt ok, just as I passed out at the nurses station from not being ok... goes into my ‘if I was a comedian I’d tell that story’ pile.

MrsMGE Tue 19-Nov-19 22:17:56

Hello everyone,

Sorry I'm not quite with it right now, work is extremely busy, I leave just before 8pm every day...just a hot period which will end soon, so no complaints. It's hard to keep up with the thread atm though!

@SunStruck Thanks, lovely, and glad I could help. It's good to be able to concentrate on something else than TTC, and even better if it's all positive. I have my interview in the end of this month, spoke to some of my colleagues and apparently it's a horror, but I'm not particularly nervous. I'll just be myself and if that's not enough then I'll say yes to a competitor sooner than later 😉 Very jealous of your KL trip! I so want to go there and New Zealand, but I need/want to prioritise buying a second car first, I've avoided it for a long time, but I have to face the reality now, DHs car is way too big and complicated for me and as I'm sadly not a female version of Lewis Hamilton, I need something small, nippy and user-friendly 😂

@LASandOtto I've been thinking about you too! How was Munich? I've been there before, Oktoberfest in fact, so a slightly blurred memory, but the Old Town was a delight.

Good luck for Friday, I'm sure some of the better versed ladies on here will give you some useful tips.

Btw, how is the house purchase going?

@Venusstarr I'm sorry you've been feeling down. I'm sending you huge, huge hugs, it can't be easy, especially not around your due date. Just do whatever feels right and don't push yourself. Thinking about you ❤️

I'm in bed already, early for me, but I'm physically and mentally tired. I've been feeling a bit rough this week, it's not a cold, but I'm feeling a bit weak and bloated and generally meh, probably it's too much work. Can't wait to get back to my exercising this weekend, survival mode for now! Xxx

MrsMGE Tue 19-Nov-19 22:26:44

@Anny27 This sounds pretty horrible, I'm sorry things went that way for you. I too lost my appetite (for 2 weeks in fact) after medical management, found that very odd. Not sure if this was psychological or hormonal maybe. Take it really easy now.

On a separate and final note for tonight, it's so nice to know so many of you are talented in knitting and gardening, these are two things that I am truly terrible at! Wish I had the patience and talent to get better! Xxx

SunStruck Wed 20-Nov-19 01:21:06

@LASandOtto haha thanks, I think I'm
Just getting on with everything to be honest, can't control it so won't stress over it just yet! I wasn't always in this mindset though, but I think with Xmas and nye coming up and lots of people visiting/fun planned, TTC is just taking a backseat in my mind. Still trying just not obsessing! How are you getting in, are you in 2ww?

@MrsMGE I'm sure the interview will go super well, you come across like such a confident, impressive and professional individual here and if you can do that on a forum I am sure you have that in spades IRL! Do you know what, we have friends getting married in NZ in April next year, DH definitely going as they are close friends to him but I'm on the fence. It's so far and expensive, and I still hope I will be pregnant by then. I want to save money and nest, and take it very easy if I'm in the first trimester because of everything that happened in the past. So we'll see, I'm a TBC for now 😄

How are all you ladies getting on?

So I'm certain AF is due today or latest tomorrow, I can feel it. My temp dropped yesterday (but went up slightly today). I'm not upset because I think one cycle inbetween mc and pregnant again is probably good for the lining, and quite frankly I'll enjoy being able to eat and drink in December blush it's that kind of season with work Xmas parties, mini Xmas days with friends, we Xmas dinners out at pubs etc... we also have 3 sets of friends/family coming out here staying with us every weekend. I'm sick of pretending to drink vodka soda lime (I never usually say no to a drink at events/parties, and I don't want people to know this early). January - March is easy, nothing on, so will be an ideal time if we're so lucky to catch then 😁😁😁

SunStruck Wed 20-Nov-19 01:28:25

Oh by the way - I'm also really impressed you ladies are good at knitting/gardening etc! I'm not, but then again I don't have a garden 😁😁😁 I hope to have a little herb garden in the future when we buy a house back in the UK, so I can cook with fresh herbs!

I'm really sorry to hear about your traumatic experience @Anny27 😔 hope you feel better soon and can get back to TTC again ASAP if that's what you want 😊

LASandOtto Wed 20-Nov-19 08:12:10

@SunStruck your next few weeks sound just like mine. My best friend lands here Saturday and she's here 3 weekends staying with us, she lives in New York now but she's over in Europe for business so she won't be with us all the time but on the weekends. Also have our other best friend joining as the 3 of us used to live together.

Not in the TWW as such yet as not ovulated after AF yet and tbh I doubt we will get much time for TTC due to aforementioned plans and Xmas is approaching and also, got these tests ahead now, so let's see.

I'm also not any good at crafts, but gardening I do love. Not saying I'm good but I quite like growing some herbs. 😊

Back to the gym today for me after 2 weeks off due to work travels and meetings, looking forward to getting a sweat on and burning off the many carbs from my Germany trip, bread upon bread! 😂

@MrsMGE agree completely with *@SunStruck*, you sound so self confident and capable, I'm usually a nervous wreck before interviews, I think next year I need to have a peruse of the market and see what's available as I quite fancy a change but this year what with hoping TTC might have a positive outcome, I didn't want to rock the boat. Good luck for the interview at the end of the month and let us know how it goes! Will be wonderful to celebrate some happy news on this thread, also not BFP related.

Munich was really nice, thanks for asking. Lovely to see my friend and her little boy is now one and he is a delight. We had so much fun cuddling and playing with him and my friend is totally happy to have him spend time with us so she could put her feet up a bit and relax whilst we did the feeds and got him dressed etc.

I just love Munich anyway, I lived there for a short year about 10 years ago and I fondly remember the time, not just because I really enjoyed the city itself, but also because of how I was at that time, how I felt, etc. I remember it as a truly happy time of my life and so, always associated a lot of good with that city. I was there with a colleague of mine who is a maternity cover, lovely lady, but oh my she talks non stop about herself. We went for dinner and she was just telling me one story of her life after another without any punctuation or breaks. I don't know if it's just me but when people speak 'at me' like that for a long time, it zaps all my energy. I want to be a good listener but when it's a monologue and no dialogue, I just feel drained after 2-3 hours.

Happy to be home now!!! No more overseas trips now until next year, everything now will be domestic!

What car are you thinking of getting for yourself?

How is all else with you?

@Anny27 I am very sorry to hear of your experience and hope you feel better very soon! Xxx

Avocuddles Wed 20-Nov-19 08:58:17

Hi ladies quick question - how long are your luteal phases? I've been expecting AF to arrive for a few day now. My strongest cheapie opk was on November 3rd so assume I ovulated a day or two after that, if at all. We didn't have unprotected sex until a week after the strong opk as we didn't want to try this month so that we could relax and enjoy our holiday (which we are very much doing... 🍷 🍸 🍹) without being in the 2WW / early pregnancy. I also had completely blank opks throughout last week so I'm not pregnant unless it's an immaculate conception, just wondering where AF is! I must be c16DPO now.....

Mumlili8 Wed 20-Nov-19 16:09:13

Hello ladies how are you all.
I'm OK think I did ovulate this cycle yay either yesterday or the day before. Temp did rise today but not a lot only to 36.37 from 36.27 so I'll have to wait and see what tomorrow brings.
I love me crochet. I have so many baby blankets now. Everytime I fall pregnant I start a new one, I think next time I'll break that routine lol
If it's a bfn this cycle I've got one more left before the new year which marks 3 years of trying. Fingers crossed 🤞 this is the one ladies

turquoisebaby Wed 20-Nov-19 16:11:05

@Avocuddles My LP is always 5-7 days, hence why I take forever to get pregnant. Although I have just ovulated on CD 12 randomly and im so excited, but trying not to get my hopes up. Do you usually get long cycles or are you fairly regular?

Mumlili8 Wed 20-Nov-19 16:11:22

@Avocuddles just a thought you said you haven't dtd since the positive opk but did you happen to dtd in the 3 days leading upto the positive opk

Anny27 Wed 20-Nov-19 16:19:03

@MrsMGE i think the appetite loss might be emotionally based but i hope that it comes back soon as i am quite slim so cant afford the weight loss haha!

@SunStruck thank you ❤ slowly but surely getting there. Did AF arrive?

@LASandOtto thanks lovely! Are you activitley ttc atm or just seeing how things go?

@Avocuddles my LP is usually 14 days (only 3 months of tracking though)

@Mumlili8 i tracked with temp last time we wetr ttc and i love it andhate it. Love it because i knoe exactly when i ovulated but also hate it as i stress about my temps every morning haha. I always hsve dreams about taking my temperature, its sad haah

Mumlili8 Wed 20-Nov-19 17:08:34

@Anny27 I know exactly what you mean about the stress of temping. I've looked into the progesterone pee sticks but I'm not paying £60 for one test. So temping I'm my case isn't always a confirmation certainty either. Sometimes my temp doesn't rise until 2 days after ovulation and sometimes it's a slow rise. I never seem to get this magical temp jump of . 5 that the net bangs on about. It totally stresses me out but I tried not doing it for a cycle and I ended up more stressed wondering if I ovulated and if we timed bding right. TTC is trying to destroy me I sure of it lol

ReeRi Wed 20-Nov-19 17:30:55

Hi all can you see my post from about ten mins ago? I definitely posted it but now can’t see it 🤔

ReeRi Wed 20-Nov-19 17:41:37

@MissSparkles81 Sorry you find yourself here. My DH has children and I lost our first child together (my first baby) in February and then had a mc in August.

@tmc14 I find it hard to keep up sometimes too but it’s good in a way that this in a active thread and very supportive. It is tough when other people are due when you should have been.

@VenusStarr Hope you’re ok and the counselling helps.

Thanks @Winkat

@LASandOtto hope the tests go well and give you some answers

Hello @Anny27 Hope you are recovering

@Avocuddles my LP is usually about 14 day’s

BUT I am having a strange cycle as I usually ov around day 14-15 but this weekend at aliens day 14 I had spotting (could have been something superficial like a cut but not sure) and then had lots of CM since yesterday as if i am fertile. Typical that things are unusual the cycle I am not tracking

Murree Wed 20-Nov-19 18:59:08

Hello everyone, hope you're all well!
Back to work this week after the CP last week, my boss was lovely and said I didn't have to be back yet (was so tempted to bugger off home haha) but i need to get back to normal.
I bought a little peg doll to go on my memorial shelf and I really think that helped me get my head around what was happening and start to move on.

Bleeding has just about stopped now thank goddness, hoping to DTD this weekend - more because I'm horny than TTC blush
Tomorrow I have to do my test to confirm that the pregnancy has finished although I am pretty sure it would be a miracle if it hadn't.

@Avocuddles my LP is about 12 days normally.

MrsMGE Wed 20-Nov-19 19:30:42

@Avocuddles My LP after the MMC was short, around 9 days. Then it got longer, luckily, and it seems to be 12-13 days now. I've been taking B complex and put myself on a fertility friendly diet and it seems to have helped (but maybe things have just got better naturally over time?).

Did you DTD in the run up to O at all?

And are you sure you ovulated then, were you temping to confirm that you have? It definitely wasn't an anovulatory cycle?

I'm having a bit of a temping nightmare, like I said earlier I've been feeling a bit yuck few times recently, my nosecwas blocked and I was breathing through my mouth in the night. I can tell the temps were not right as a result, and annoyingly, it's happened just before and just after the time when I suspect I ovulated. OPKs seem to suggest one thing, FF has gone crazy now and changed my O date to a later one, then today it gave me a warning that O pattern may not have been detected, urgh. I temped this morning and it first showed 36.10C when my mouth was really cold, and then within a minute or so I took another reading and it was 36.75C. Crazy stuff, girls. I think I'm going to have to temp again next month to have a better idea of my O date these days xxx

MrsMGE Wed 20-Nov-19 19:34:34

@Mumlili8 I felt quite emotional reading your post, I think it's a lovely idea and every single one of your blankets is a beautiful keepsake. So special. Xxx

Avocuddles Wed 20-Nov-19 19:47:34

@ReeRi can't see your earlier post....but assume that's it's one that came after? If you've got lots of CM have you managed to DTD over the past few days?

@Murree the peg doll memorial sounds like a lovely idea.

@anny27 @Mumlili8 I completely agree re the stress of temping interrupting your sleep! I don't think it is accurate for me either - I was trying it the second time I conceived and all it did was convince me that I was 'out' for the month when actually I was pregnant!

@Mumlili8 the first time we DTD without protection was a week after what I believed was a positive opk. Although I'm now suspecting that I haven't actually ovulated this cycle which is frustrating given that the doctor performing my HyCoSy 3 weeks ago could see a ripe follicle waiting to be released....
I really hope this is the one for you!!!! Three years is such a long time. 19 months for me now and that feels like a lifetime. I just wish I knew where our journey will take us. The not knowing is the hardest part of the TTC experience in my opinion.

@turquoisebaby my cycles are unfortunately long and irregular. I'd been referred for fertility treatment before I conceived for the first time as my cycle were always 35+ days, and am fortunate enough to still be seeing them under the NHS. I was optimistic that my cycles had improved when I had my first AF just 30 days after my second miscarriage but I'm now on CD34 so that hasn't turned out to be true sad
On the plus side have my next fertility appointment on December 12th and am assuming the next step will be to try clomid....has anyone on here been down that route?

On a completely unrelated note, I know we've had a few conversations on here about books recently and have a recommendation to share....
I raced through 'Expectation' by Anna Hope this morning (can't beat holiday reading) and really enjoyed it. It follows the lives of four fictional women in their mid-late thirties and examines a number of issues and experiences with which many of us are familiar. It does include infertility and miscarriage so if you find that triggering be warned, but I would definitely recommend it to fans of contemporary fiction, Sally Rooney etc....

Avocuddles Wed 20-Nov-19 20:08:59

@MrsMGE can you share details of the vitamin b you are taking?

I'm suspecting this cycle is anovulatory. On the plus side this means that my fertility referral may prove to be worthwhile....

MrsMGE Wed 20-Nov-19 20:25:57

@SunStruck I'd TOTALLY go to NZ if I were you! You'll have major regrets if you don't go. I see what you mean, but you remember all the conversations we've had about not planning our next pregnancies because it doesn't work like that and not putting our lives on hold because of the "what ifs"? Honestly, I'd be booking those flights and investing in good, comprehensive insurance, both travel and health. Obviously it's totally up to you, but truthfully, in the first trimester you'd be fine to fly anyway, even long haul. I personally would 100% book NZ for March 2020 if it wasn't for the fact that I need to save up 6k in cash for my little runner and I don't want a second loan before our remortgage. And of course end of the year is always expensive with Christmas etc.

I'm also looking forward to enjoying all the nice food and drinks around Christmas! Xxx

@LASandOtto I know what you mean. It's a shame you went with someone like this, it can be draining. But at least you have lots to look forward to before Christmas! How are you feeling before your appointment on Friday?

Like I said above, SunStruck and I had chats before about taking opportunities during TTC. In reality, things may take time for all of us, as we now know. So the conclusion was, there's no point in postponing things because who knows what's going to happen and when. Focusing our minds on something else is good for us now too. Obviously if you're happy where you are, there's no point in changing for the sake of it (and I take the point re having enhanced maternity etc), but if, for instance, you are not happy or you've had it on your mind for a while, then I'd say don't hold back. Men never do...and they'll need to look after the kids in the future too.

I'm debating between a Toyota Aygo and Peugeot 108, I only need it for short local drives so nothing over the top!

I'm doing OK, thanks, still meditate regularly, definitely going back to my gym & exercise after a 3 day break cause work has been so busy.

Thank you to you & @SunStruck for your kind words. It hasn't always been this way, but I've always been blunt and outspoken. Some don't take it well 😂 Confidence came after too many people tried to put me down, including an emotionally abusive ex-partner, after years of being underpaid, after working with several male bosses who were sexist and spoke to people like shit. I've had it, I'm done, I'm not taking this anymore - but I used to in my 20s. Now I know I'm better than the lot of them, I've worked harder, I know my stuff, and I'm not afraid to own it. We're in our 30s, we're obviously very switched on women, it's finally time to shake off the imposter syndrome, right? If not now, then when? Xxx

MrsMGE Wed 20-Nov-19 20:46:22

@Avocuddles This is the one I've got - I looked at the dose in the usual preconception supplements and this one was the closest. I don't recommend Holland & Barrett ones cause they have something crazy, like 5000+% recommended daily dose. I chose a safe bet not to go over the top before conceiving, too much is not good either.

34 days is still a fine cycle, and keep in mind you may have Od later, OPKs don't work for everyone. It's tricky with temps too, isn't it. I have a friend with PCOS and she had to buy Ovusense to work it all out as standard methods didn't work for her. Turns out she is ovulating. Don't worry just yet, you may well have Od but it may not have been picked up. Every woman has anovulatory cycles and even if this has happened to you, it might not happen again. Finally, you're right, if there's an issue, they'll likely give you Clomid to kick-start things. It will be OK. Xxx

Avocuddles Wed 20-Nov-19 21:56:20

Thanks @MrsMGE! I'm taking Pregnacare Max which looks like it contains the same but I'll look at the box properly once I'm back home at the weekend.

It looked like I wasn't ovulating at all but I (and my doctors) were proved wrong when I fell pregnant not once but twice. There is still likely to be an underlying issue however. If AF starts tomorrow that will be day 35 but any longer than that and it creeps into 'abnormal' territory. As I wasn't trying to conceive this cycle I'm not concerned about not ovulating from that point of view, but I just wish that things could be normal and regular so I could have the confidence that there was at least some possibility of a positive outcome.....

Littlegoth Wed 20-Nov-19 22:04:03

Please can I join?

Age: 38
3 mc in June and December 2018 and July 2019
TTC since June 2017

We’ve put TTC on hold as we were referred to the local recurrent miscarriage clinic. Waiting is really really hard, but I tested positive for APS following my first recurrent miscarriage clinic appointment and I’m due the second set of blood tests next month which will confirm whether I definitely do have APS - ovulation is the week after that and will be doing my best for 4th time lucky x

MrsMGE Wed 20-Nov-19 22:36:30

@Avocuddles My cycles go funny every time I travel abroad, I have no idea whether it's related to flying, but every single time I go away abroad, they are longer. Could this have an impact on your cycles too? Xxx

Seahawk80 Thu 21-Nov-19 08:21:27

Just having a catch up while watching lion king with DS for the 8 thousandth time, part of my problem is my brain is like a sieve these days so I catch up and then start to write a reply and can't remember what I wanted to say to people 😂 anyway here goes!

@tmc14 thank you this thread does race along doesn't it! I'd like to try to get into knitting etc. Problem is my mum is super good at that kind of thing so she knits hats / makes clothes / quilts for DS and mends / alters my clothes. I'm ashamed to admit I even give her tough stains to get out! I'm hoping to grow some more veg next year as last year I managed 10 potatoes.

@Avocuddles hope you had a lovely trip. My cycles are often random, AF was 5 days late last month. I now only test a day or 2 after I'm due so that I can't convince myself it's too early. I know what you mean about not knowing what will happen. I'm a planner and if someone could tell me when I'd have another child I'd be fine, even if it was a few years away. But that limbo feeling is tough, especially for your first. I do feel so lucky to have DS and one positive from all this is it does help me to be more patient on the challenging days with a toddler. Having fertility issues has made me feel like this from day 1, so a silver lining is that I do think it makes you a better parent when you finally get there.

@SunStruck I'd be the same this month, it will be nice to relax over Xmas and my birthdays the week before.

I'm going out with one of my nct friends tonight who had an mmc recently so we can have a good old moan about how unfair it all is.

Seahawk80 Thu 21-Nov-19 08:23:33

Oh and @tmc14 sorry the hospital called you about your appointment. It really is ridiculous that things aren't linked. I had that about an appointment and then my 20 week scan. It's the last thing you need.

Seahawk80 Thu 21-Nov-19 08:40:57

Oh and nothing to do with TTC but @Avocuddles I'd love to know what Mamma Mia the party is like. Thinking of it with my mum and sisters for my 40th next year!

turquoisebaby Thu 21-Nov-19 13:50:29

Hi all, I'm mostly a watcher but I I'm so confused and was wondering if anyone had any insight.

So on cd12 I had a positive opk, I'm currently CD17 and 5DPO on a whim I decided to do another OPK and it came back positive, so I did a cheapie pregnancy test, blazing positive. Ran to Asda and got a CB Digital and it's saying 2-3 weeks. I had a MMC at the end of August and I have had a negative result since then to comfirm end of miscarriage. How can I possible be pregnant? Any idea whats happening to me? I'm a bit sceptical of it and don't want to trust the pregnanct test. Is it possible to have periods whilst pregnant?

Winkat Thu 21-Nov-19 17:03:15

Someone mentioned something about getting a little keepsake to commemorate a loss (sorry I've lost track of who it was!), just want to say I totally get that. I have been considering getting a tiny tattoo but haven't got round to it yet! BUT I have just received a little fertility bracelet (from Etsy) with crystals that are meant to support fertility etc. I don't even know if I believe in crystals but I was drawn to getting something that 'helps'.
xxxx

Winkat Thu 21-Nov-19 17:09:59

@turquoisebaby sounds like you need to get yourself to the GP! Fingers crossed for you smile

Avocuddles Thu 21-Nov-19 17:27:17

@turquoisebaby what was your period like? I guess based on the dates it would suggest that it might have been an implantation bleed (I thought they were a myth but heard from plenty of others that it sometimes does happen....)? Though if it was heavy that doesn't really make sense?

@Seahawk80 we go between Christmas and new year, will let you know what it's like! Enjoy your night out with your friend tonight.
I am definitely with you regarding being a planner - I like to always be thinking ten steps ahead and the inability to do that is a disconcerting part of the TTC journey.....

@MrsMGE travelling can definitely wreck havoc on cycles / the body in general - I've worked in China in the past and that would always make me feel out of balance, though I'm in the same time zone as the UK at the moment so probably not too much impact. Still no sign of AF but I am feeling a bit crampy so hope it might be coming soon. Just want to have a fresh new cycle!
I empathise completely with your comments around confidence and shaking off imposter syndrome. I've told younger colleagues a number of times that your 30s are so much better than your 20s and they shake their heads at me in disbelief, but I'd like to think that in ten years time they'll have the same perspective. Life has been tough over the past decade, but I'm also wiser, in a fantastic relationship (my 1st marriage having not been good....), I have a close circle of friends that I can really rely on and a job that I enjoy. I don't have a baby yet but all of those other pieces of the jigsaw are solid and that's hell of a lot better than when I was 20, 25 or 30.....

Avocuddles Thu 21-Nov-19 17:29:45

@Winkat I also have a similar bracelet. I like wearing it because it reminds me of what I have experienced in a subtle way.
I've also considered a tattoo. Someone I know has three tiny hearts on her wrist to represent her her stilllbirth and two subsequent miscarriages, I think it's lovely to have a permanent memorial to her daughter and other losses.

turquoisebaby Thu 21-Nov-19 19:08:53

@Winkat I have called the GP this afternoon x

@Avocuddles My period came on the day it was due and was my regular flow and lasted the full 5 days as usual. It's all a bit messed up.

MrsMGE Thu 21-Nov-19 19:16:37

@Avocuddles I so agree with you. I may have been fitter, hotter and more of a party animal (these days it's very rare I'm out, out...and never out, out, out 😂), but my life and mindset are so much better in my 30s.

Re travelling, I had two cycles in the past, one 46 days after travelling to Italy and one 57 days after my trip to Australia. Normally they're off by about 5 days whenever I go abroad, no matter how far xxx

MrsMGE Thu 21-Nov-19 19:19:46

@Winkat I have a keepsake bracelet from Etsy and a keepsake box which I ordered from Amazon and decorated myself. @Avocuddles I am thinking about a tattoo too, although I haven't got any and I don't think tattoos suit me, but I would be fine with a discreet one. Xxx

MummaShu Thu 21-Nov-19 19:29:59

Hello all.... just saw this thread, thought I'd say hi smile

I'm 30yrs old. Had my first daughter 2 years ago now, and on 6th TTC cycle for baby number 2.... had 2 cp, including last month. Finding it a bit difficult to get excited again but going to keep trying. Wishing you all the best!

Samk79 Thu 21-Nov-19 21:55:18

Hello ladies

I hope you don't mind me joining. I have two older children from a previous marriage but started ttc with my new husband last year. I fell pg in jan but it sadly ended in mmc which I had to have surgery for.

I'm 40 and my husband is 46, although we aren't taking any precautions, my husband now thinks we are too old ☹️

Mumlili8 Thu 21-Nov-19 22:38:21

@MrsMGE @Winkat @Avocuddles

I make and sell these bracelets on ebay. I've always believed in the power of healing crystals. I send each one out with a healing wish and a prayer. It's really nice when people message me to say they have fallen pregnant.

MrsMGE Thu 21-Nov-19 23:38:56

@Mumlili8 What crystals do you use and what's the theory behind them? I am quite interested in this, my beautician who suffered MCs mentioned therapy with crystals to me. I was not a believer, but having tried acupuncture and reflexology, I found that they had a very positive effect on me and I'd happily try any treatments that improve my energy flow xxx

Avocuddles Thu 21-Nov-19 23:58:03

@turquoisebaby good luck to you, let us know how you get on....

@Mumlili8 I second @MrsMGE 's question re which crystals you use and what they are supposed to do. My fertility crystals bracelet is attached, this is from a local independent business and came with a leaflet explaining what each of them was supposed to do though can't for the life of me remember now.....

@Samk79 @MummaShu welcome to you both and thanks for sharing your stories. I hope you both get your rainbow BFPs soon r🌈

Mumlili8 Fri 22-Nov-19 00:55:01

@Avocuddles @MrsMGE

All beads have been selected due to their association with fertility. Many cultures around the world believe that gem stones / crystals may have an effect on the human body and may boost fertility. Also if you bath the beads periodically in moon light it charges them abit like a battery. The stones vibrate at a certain frequency that is supposed to interact with your body. They use quartz in clocks for that very reason.

Moonstone( white) - is thought to boost fertility, balance emotions, help to regulate menstrual cycle and boost female energy.

RoseQuartz ( pink) - is thought to boost overall fertility, be beneficial when trying to become pregnant, while pregnant and during childbirth.

Aventurine(Light Green) – is thought to boost fertility, encourage pregnancy, promote optimism and self confidence, also increase luck.

Red Carnelian (Red / orange) - is thought to boost fertility , energy, sexuality and planned reproduction, help to balance the energy of the female reproductive system. May help to ease PMS and reduce the discomfort of menstrual cramps.

Aquamarine( pale blue) – is thought to be beneficial during pregnancy, believed to be a protective stone.

Unakite(dark green/ brown/ orange mixed) – is thought to help to cleanse and balance, boost fertility and be beneficial during pregnancy and childbirth.

Amethyst(purple) – is thought to help reduce stress and anxiety, fear and wards off negative energies.

Green Jade( medium green) – is thought to have protective properties and boosts fertility, spiritually it may help to support happiness, harmony and relationships. Is also thought to bring good luck.

Haematite(black / dark grey) – is thought to be helpful in relaxing, grounding and circulation. May bolster courage and energies in challenging situations. Is also thought to help to counter negative energies in your environment.

Mumlili8 Fri 22-Nov-19 01:00:50

@MrsMGE crystal therapy is slightly different that involves placing crystals on different areas of the body very much like Reiki healing which I also go too

tmc14 Fri 22-Nov-19 06:27:15

@ReeRi thank you, yes even when just lurking this thread has been so helpful over the last 6 weeks. I hope your cycle settles down.

@LASandOtto glad you enjoyed Munich, I used to visit when I had a friend there. She sadly moved to quite a dull German town! Ha. My old boss used to be like to travel with, I’d fake some urgent work to do in my hotel room just to get a little break. Good luck with the appointment today.

@Littlegoth I’m so sorry for your losses, I hope the tests show something you can work on.

@seahawk80 10 potatoes is good! My gardening is very hit and miss... but this week my friend made a massive batch of carrot soup with carrots we’d grown from seed at her allotment and I don’t think I’ve ever felt so satisfied! Haha. I’m a chuck it in & see what works gardener. As for knitting, my mum is also great at it, I’m very much an amateur but am slowly learning.

@MummaShu Sorry for your loss, I’m like you ttc #2. I think the early excitement will definitely be missing if I get pregnant again, I think that’s normal.

@Samk79 Welcome, sorry to hear your story. I’m a few weeks away from turning 40 & my DH is 44. I’m hoping we’re not too old!! I definitely feel the added pressure of age though.

The chat about travel & cycles is fascinating, I’ve never tracked while travelling before... really interesting stuff.

I’ve also been thinking about a small keepsake in some way to remember my tiny lost baby. Haven’t figured out what feels suitable yet though. Really liking reading the suggestions though.

I’ve been up half the night, DS1 has a fever/bad cold. Meeting a friend for lunch today who told me last night she’s pregnant, due a month after I should have been. Third in two weeks!! I’m super happy for her, especially as they’ve taken a while to get pregnant, but still, had a little cry for myself last night. Right, back to watching In the Night Garden... hope everyone is ok and has nice weekend plans. Quiet one for us as we keep getting ill, think we need some down time xx

tmc14 Fri 22-Nov-19 06:29:08

Oh, and good luck @turquoisebaby hope you get a good answer from the GP x

MrsMGE Fri 22-Nov-19 06:34:40

@Mumlili8 Oh wow, I didn't realise it's like reiki and that it's different to wearing crystals. Really interesting. So how do the crystals that you wear as jewellery interact with your body? Are you meant to take them off at certain times, touch them, like you say, bath them? Also, you should get your bracelets on Etsy and Notonthehighstreet if you're not on there yet! Xxx

VenusStarr Fri 22-Nov-19 07:09:34

Hi everyone, just popping in to say hello.

I had my first session yesterday, it's not counselling, turns out she's a clinical psychologist and we're looking at actual therapy. Yesterday was hard, she thinks I've got unresolved grief and trauma. I think I skipped the some of the first cycle after my first loss and everything is coming out now after my second. So that might explain why I've been feeling so awful.
Less than 2 weeks until my operation, I have so much anxiety attached to this but it's what's keeping me going, having that focus.

I have been trying to read everything, welcome to the new people, sorry you find yourself here, but these ladies are so supportive smile hi @Samk79 lovely to see you here xx

Mumlili8 Fri 22-Nov-19 08:14:24

@VenusStarr hi hun good to hear frome you. Sounds like your talking to the right person. I hope your op going well hun, keep us posted.
@MrsMGE it's all to do with the frequency at with each stone vibrates. All you have to do is keep them next to your skin like in a bracelet form. You can wear them all the time but water can damage the quality of the beads so I'd advise removing for shower/baths. If you Google moonstone for fertility it quite interesting.

Join the discussion

Registering is free, quick, and means you can join in the discussion, watch threads, get discounts, win prizes and lots more.

Get started »